Alex and Lily

Lily couldn't believe how quickly her three years in Oxford had passed. Graduation was coming up, and she could still remember the first day she arrived in the ancient city and how overwhelming she had initially found it. She remembered how alone she had initially felt before finding her place and her struggles. If she was honest with herself, she knew that she only felt like she belonged after getting to know Alex and letting their relationship develop.

He was her daily reminder not to judge a book by its cover and that a person's past did not define their future. It was funny to think that, given that Alex's background defined so much of who he was, he had fought and rebelled against almost every expectation set for him. He had taught her to live on her terms.

The approach of graduation felt like the start of their real future. Lily had managed to turn the internship she'd done the summer before into a full-time job, which she'd start in September. The plan was to move in with Alex and his grandmother and spend the entire summer with him in Botswana before they began their careers. Mike and Sarah were hosting another braai to celebrate the two of them and their achievement. As she got ready, Lily remembered her conversation with Sarah over lunch a few days earlier when she invited them to attend her graduation ceremony, but Sarah refused.

"No," Sarah said simply. Lily, we love you, but this is a moment for you and your parents and grandparents. We get to see you and how you've grown in Oxford every day. Share this accomplishment with them. We'll host the after-party and celebrate with you then."

"It just feels weird not inviting you when you've been my Oxford family since the day we met," Lily replied.

"We are your Oxford family. We don't need to attend a ceremony to prove it. If it was a different ceremony and you and Alex were exchanging rings, then we'd be there in a heartbeat."

"Don't joke about that," Lily laughed. "We're too young, we don't have a house or a car, we need to get settled first."

"I didn't realise you needed any of those things to marry your partner of two years, who you tell me is the love of your life," Sarah teased back. "As for not having a house, I'm pretty sure my husband is helping you move in with Alex and Jean after you graduate."

"That's his grandma's house, not our place, you know," Lily replied defensively.

"I do know, but it's still the first home you're going to share with him and knowing Jean, she won't want you to think of it as her house. When you lived with us, we made it clear it was your home, too. Jean will want it to be the same when you move in with them."

"I know she's made that very clear. I just didn't expect my first home with my boyfriend to be living with his grandma."

"Poor Lily, getting to live rent-free in Oxford's most expensive suburb while working her dream job," Sarah teased again.

"I know what you're saying is true. It's just I never imagined getting to this point. I mean, coming here and graduating was a given, but meeting Alex and this journey with him was never part of the plan."

"You know the old saying, 'Man plans, and God laughs'," Sarah replied. "Life is weird that way. I didn't know Mike was the love of my life the day I met him. He was just the nice, withdrawn guy in the friend group at the pub I joined."

"Hey, I thought you said it was love at first sight," Lily teased as they stood in the hall.

"Lily, there is no such thing. Love takes time and work. It's like a delicate plant. If you nurture it, it grows and thrives. If you start neglecting it, it withers and begins to die. What I had with Mike was intrigue at first sight. I've told you before I was broken when I met him. I couldn't even conceive a relationship with anyone. I just knew from Mandy and the other girls that he was this kind, protective figure, and then I met him, and he felt like a safe haven in the storm, the love built from there."

"Why do you always make your story with Mike into a fairy tale?" Lily asked.

"Because it is a fairy tale, one that I get to live daily. And don't give me shit; your life is an actual fairy tale, little miss working-class girl from Redcar falling in love with an actual African prince."

Lily thought about Sarah's words as she packed up her things in preparation for her move. It was astonishing to see how much she had accumulated over the three short years she had been in Oxford. As she organised what she wanted to keep, donate or throw away, she kept being brought back to Sarah's idea that love had to be worked on. Thinking about Alex, she realised it made perfect sense. She thought about the way she had learned to prioritise and support him. How her initial disdain for him had turned into love as she worked to peel back the layers behind her first impressions to see him for who he really was. Finishing her junk pile, she sighed and took a shower before packing a bag to go to Alex's place.

The next few days passed in a blur; Lily and Alex were still incredibly busy despite university being over. There was so much to do with packing in anticipation of her move and the arrival of her parents and grandparents. Alex's dad arrived the weekend before the ceremony, which was the first time her parents had met him. Matthew turned out to be an incredible host for her grandparents. Since it was their first visit to Oxford, he took over, giving them tours of the city and occupying them, giving Alex and Lily time to themselves and to be with their friends as their Oxford journey together came to an end.

Meghan was moving to London to join the Foreign Office, and Jess had been accepted to do a master's degree at Cambridge. Lily knew it was a good move and was pleased for her friend despite accusing her of being a traitor and joining the enemy. Alex was busy saying goodbye to his rugby team and passing on his nomination of who should replace him as captain. Lily had little sympathy for him the morning after his final night out with the team when he complained of a massive hangover.

Finally, the day came, and after having breakfast with her family, Lily spent the morning getting ready with Meg and Jess. She was a little sad, thinking it was the last time they'd get ready together in their flat. Wanting to mark the moment, she insisted on a final picture of the three of them before they put on their gowns and headed to the Sheldonian Theatre.

Lily couldn't spot her family in the audience as she took her seat in the auditorium, waiting for her name to be called. Finally, her name was called, and she went up to be hooded by the vice-chancellor. The moment was bittersweet. She felt a great sense of achievement but also a little sadness that this part of her journey was over. As the ceremony was brought to a close and the new graduates filed out of the room, she finally caught up to Alex and hugged him.

"I'm so proud of you and what you've accomplished," He whispered as they waited for their families to find them.

After their parents had taken enough pictures to fill several albums and they'd made a polite stop at the mini drink reception the college was hosting, it was finally time for their party. Lily was a little sad that she'd barely gotten a moment with Alex in days, but she accepted that their families wanted to celebrate with them, and she'd have plenty of time with him once everyone had left.

Walking into Mike and Sarah's garden, Lily was surprised at how much had been done for them. There was a giant banner. And almost everybody that she'd gotten to know during her time in Oxford was there waiting for them. Naturally, the first people to run up and congratulate them were the children. As always, Alex received Will's first hug, but Lily didn't mind as Lettie and Kate ran up to her first. Kate had opened up so much over the year and was now free with her affections. Once the kids were settled, Lily let everyone else pass on the congratulations.

It was her favourite part of the day. The pomp and tradition of the graduation ceremony had been nice, but this was what she really wanted: the people she cared most about in the world coming together.

After her family returned to Redcar, her attention turned to their extended trip to Botswana. She'd been hesitant about going for nearly three months, but Alex had worn her down.

"It's my last chance to spend an extended time there before we start our jobs," Alex had told her when she had initially raised her concerns. "I don't want to go without you, but I don't know when or if we'll have the time to make another trip like this. It'll be fun; we can explore so much more than we did when we went last year, plus we have Don and Penny's wedding to attend."

"I understand all that. It just feels weird not having to do anything for months. I've worked every summer since I was 16," Lily replied.

"Sounds like you need this as much as I do. Let's just enjoy the summer, well, winter in Botswana and see what happens."

"Winter in July and August is so weird to me," Lily sighed.

"Come on, you understand how hemispheres work. The days are mild, but the nights and early mornings are colder than you'd expect."

Unlike the year before, they weren't met by a large welcoming committee when they arrived in Botswana. It was just a driver that Matthew had arranged to take them to the house. Lily smiled as she watched Alex ignore his unpacking and go to explore the property and his childhood home. Leaving him alone to enjoy being home, Lily reacquainted herself with the house and put the kettle on for coffee.

"Hey," Alex said, finding her in the kitchen. "We've got dinner with Don, Penny and the others tonight. Penny wants to tell us how we can help with their wedding prep until Mike and Sarah get here."

"Is there anything special we have to do," Lily asked.

"If it was a traditional wedding then yes, but since neither of them are Motswana, it'll just be a normal wedding. Ceremony, reception, dancing, loads of food and booze."

"So if we get married, we'd have a traditional wedding?" Lily asked.

"Yes. Most people have multiple ceremonies, a party to celebrate the legal wedding. Then there's the ceremony at the bride's family home to prepare their daughter to leave their home before the final ceremony with the groom's family."

Lily really enjoyed catching up with the people she had met a year previously. Candice still took great pleasure in bullying Alex, particularly in Mike's absence, but she was no longer treated like the newcomer. She found out there wasn't much in the way of wedding planning to do. The wedding was being held at the clubhouse of the Golf Estate where Mike and Sarah owned their Botswana home. What did surprise her was that she was being treated as a bridesmaid.

"You're part of the family now, so you're a bridesmaid. Only Mandy and Sarah are standing up with me, but I want all the girls to wear the same dress," Penny told her when she'd expressed her surprise. It'd be great if we could arrange a fitting for you soon. My seamstress is already annoyed Mandy, Sarah, and Beth are only coming a week before the wedding. You're also invited to my hen weekend; we're going to Sun City."

"Thanks, Penny, just say when, and I'll be at the fitting. What are the boys doing for Don's stag do?"

"We're going camping," Don answered.

"Typical," Lily said, rolling her eyes.

"They aren't going real camping," Candice explained. "It's a secret spot we know with no animals. They're just going to drink in the bush and pretend to fish for a couple of days."

In the days that followed, Lily readjusted to the Botswana pace of life. It was much slower and less urgent than she was used to, and she enjoyed the change. Alex's friends were still at university in South Africa, so they didn't have a lot of daytime company. She really enjoyed the lazy mornings alone with him, having carefree sex and getting to explore the city as a local rather than a tourist. With more time on their hands, Alex showed her some of the places they'd skipped on their previous visit.

A simple pattern emerged, they'd enjoy their mornings together before Alex went to his old school to help Don coach the rugby team while Lily found herself with Penny and the other girls going over wedding plans. At the weekends, they'd go and visit Alex's grandparents before Sunday dinners with Auntie Sharon and the others.

Lily enjoyed those visits. The hospitality was still there, but Alex's family treated her more like another daughter than a guest or his girlfriend. She was included in all the activities as the older women taught her some of the expectations of being a woman in Botswana culture.

"We don't expect you to live like this all the time. Most of us don't," One of the aunts told her while they washed up the dishes from lunch. "But it's nice when we come home to keep the traditions of our ancestors alive. Sometimes, when foreign women come into our world, they think they're above such tasks or believe we're backwards for upholding these gender roles, but I'd rather be doing this than chopping firewood or cleaning out a goat."

"I don't mind," Lily said honestly. "I don't even really see it as gender-based; it's just putting people into roles that best match their skills. Alex is much better with an axe than I will ever be, so it makes sense for him to chop the wood."

They'd been in Botswana for nearly three weeks when Alex brought up the idea of taking a weekend away.

"I've been thinking. Everyone is going to be here this time next week, and then the wedding will take over everything; this weekend is probably our last chance for it to be just us for a while."

"I'd love that. Where would we go?"

"We could do the Salt pans; there's this cool campsite in the middle called Kubu Island; the night sky out there will take your breath away."

"That sounds amazing, but how will we get there? Your dad doesn't have a camping 4x4."

"I'll talk to Don. He has the keys for Mike and Sarah's, or we can borrow his."

Lily quickly agreed and, after googling the campsite, got incredibly excited. She was especially appreciative that they could leave at a relatively reasonable time instead of 4 am like they had before.

Lily enjoyed the drive to the Salt Pans; it was through a completely different part of the country from what she had previously experienced. Lily enjoyed the commentary as Alex pointed out different places to her. Finally, they made it to the edge of the Salt Pans, and she was shocked. She had never seen a more flat desolate place in her life. No matter where she looked, it all appeared the same to her.

After driving slowly across the pan for an hour, a large rock formation appeared on the horizon. Alex finally started explaining.

"That's our home for the next two nights. There's almost no wildlife out here, so we don't have to worry about visitors. The only rule is we leave with everything we've brought."

Lily nodded, still awestruck by the expanse of the world's largest salt flats and the terrain. As Alex set up their campsite, Lily helped where she could but mostly left him to it, realising he was quicker without her assistance. When he was done with the campsite and set up the fire to light later, he took her on a tour of the 'island'.

They took a break at the top of the rock outcrop, where he sat next to her.

"This is the first place Mike took me after Mum died," he started slowly. "I was so angry about everything, and one day, Dad came home and said that he'd found someone for me to talk to. I was dismissive at first, you know. I was a typical teenager, thinking no one understood what I was going through. Then Mike turned up at the house at the crack of dawn and told me I had half an hour to get a shower and pack for a couple of days. I told him to fuck off, but he just laughed and told me 'he wasn't asking' in that voice he uses when he takes charge."

Lily smiled, knowing the voice he was talking about, but didn't interrupt.

"I looked to Dad for support, but he shrugged and told me that I needed to talk to someone and take a chance. The entire way here, I didn't talk; I was angry at Dad for making me deal with this stranger; I was angry at Mike for just assuming he knew what I was going through. So I just looked out the window, making it clear I wanted nothing to do with him. Realising I wasn't going to talk, Mike took the lead. He explained his life to me and how he'd lost his mum at a similar age, but then he started telling me how lucky I was."

"Mike told you that you were lucky your mum died?" Lily asked incredulously.

"I'm getting there. But no, he didn't. He told me how lucky I was to have a mum who loved me and never let me doubt it and a dad who was willing to do anything to help me heal. He'd had neither; as much as he wanted to believe his mum loved him, she died without him knowing if she had. When his mum died, his dad was already getting ready to marry his stepmum, and within a month, he was forgotten as the wedding took over. He told me I had a right to my grief and anger, but if I stopped living my life, I'd be disrespecting Mum's memory. He pointed out that everyone dies eventually, and I had a choice. I could celebrate her memory by living the life she would want for me, or I could close myself off and turn bitter and resentful. He said he didn't care what I chose because I was the one who'd have to look in the mirror and tell myself I was living the life Mum wanted for me. When we got here, he didn't bother unpacking or setting up camp; he just stood in front of me and pointed out we were the only people out here, and it was my chance to let go of all my anger in whatever way I chose. I could scream if I wanted, I could hit him if I wanted, and while he wouldn't let me beat him up, he wouldn't stop me if I tried. I swung at him carelessly at him until I got tired. I never touched him. He stopped all my punches easily until I tired and broke down. I just started crying and screaming out all the pain and anger, and he hugged me. I tried to push him away, but he just held me tighter and told me he wasn't going anywhere and that he'd hold me for as long as I needed. It was okay for me to let go because he'd hold me up. For the rest of that night and the next day, we just talked. We laughed, we cried and got drunk together. When we were done, he didn't take me home; he took me to Auntie Sharon's, where I met Don and all the others. They didn't ask me about Mum or anything; they just hugged me and told me I was family now, and whenever I needed someone, they'd be there for me. Mike saved my life. I'm not saying I was suicidal, but the path I could've gone down at that moment would never have led me to you."

Lily didn't know how to react to Alex's confession. She sort of understood him, but she couldn't imagine the pain of losing a parent. Not knowing what to say, she tried to make a joke.

"Two years together, and you've never made me cry, and you chose this beautiful place to start."

"That wasn't the idea. This is my favourite place in Botswana because of that weekend. It was my rebirth and put me onto the path to becoming who I am now. I wanted to share this place with you."

"In that case, I'll make sure to thank Mike when he gets here," Lily said softly before kissing him.

That evening, Lily was treated to the best show of her life. So far removed from any form of civilisation, when the stars came out, it was like nothing she had ever seen before. The stars were so bright that the night didn't feel fully dark. She could see the Milky Way and other things without a telescope, and Alex used the spotlight to point out constellations she'd never heard of. It was so relaxing just being out in the middle of nowhere with him and appreciating his company.

As they drove back to town, Lily never felt closer to Alex. Seeing a road sign that would take them to Alex's village, Lily asked for a detour.