A Tale of Two Itties

"Where is it?" I grumbled, scanning the shelves. "Nope, nope, not that one...There! that one, finally." I gingerly pulled the dark, leather bound tome from its hiding place. I needed this book for one of my classes and not being available on-line, I had taken to hunting in used book stores and local libraries hoping to score a copy. My efforts had finally paid off. I was so jacked I didn't see her until I literally ran her down, knocking her rather unceremoniously on her ass.

"Oh Shit!." I sputtered. "I didn't...I wasn't..."

"Are you always this articulate?" She asked, smiling up at me and raising her hand.

I stood, still in shock, much longer than I had intended. Once I finally got a good look at her, my brain ceased to function. She was beautiful, stunning, angelic. No amount of adjectives would suffice to describe her. My mind reeled.

"You gonna help me up?" She giggled.

I continued babbling like a complete idiot, but I did manage enough brain function to offer my hand and pull her to her feet. "Are... are you OK?"

She did a quarter turn and rubbed her ass cheeks with both hands. "I think I'm OK, how do I look?" She grinned mischievously, wiggling her hips.

My mouth hung open, my eyes locked onto her back side and my pants suddenly became at least two sizes too small. "Y-you l-look fine to m-me."

She turned back to face me. "I'm Stephanie, I think I've seen you around campus, haven't I?"

The used bookstore was just off university property and catered to the students, so it wasn't terribly surprising that I'd run down a classmate.

"I-I'm D-Darrin." I stammered. "Darrin Newkirk. I j-just started classes. I'm so s-sorry. I wasn't p-paying attention. I feel l-like such an idiot."

"No harm done Darrin." She smiled. "Maybe you could buy me a coffee and explain to me why you're assaulting strangers."

All the color drained from my face, but before I could respond, Stephanie grinned and tittered. "Just kidding. You are just WAY too serious. But I would like a coffee and a chat."

I nodded. She was more right than she knew. "Why in the world would you want to talk to me?"

"Well, first, I've never seen anyone that excited about a book." She teased. "And second, I do think you're kinda cute."

I'm a lot of things. Smart, tall, nerdy, painfully shy, clumsy, fashion challenged, socially inept, but cute, no way. I have a face only a mother could love. Even my own mother would qualify that statement with a 'cute, in his own kind of way'. I make Steve Buscemi look like Brad Pitt. I need a pork chop vest to get dogs to play with me. If she thinks I'm cute, I fear I may have damaged her brain in the collision.

While my mind churned, she looped her arm through mine and towed me to the cashier, then out of the bookstore towards the coffee shop on the next block. I only vaguely registered the events as my personal operating system was attempting a forced reboot.

I was jolted back to reality when she plopped me into a chair, then bent down, whispered her coffee order into my ear and kissed me on the cheek and sat herself down next to me, smiling demurely.

I staggered to the counter and ordered her coffee, getting a water for myself, then returned.

We (mostly she) talked for the next hour or so, after I explained why I was so excited about the book I found anyway. After that, I barely got a word in edgeways which was OK with me. Conversation was another of my deficits.

"Darrin, this may be a little forward." She stated. "My sorority is having their first party of the year this Saturday. Would you come with me?"

"Like a date?" I questioned.

"Well yes." She humphed. "You don't like me?"

"I...you...FUCK!" I muttered, taking a deep breath and trying to calm myself. Panic attacks, another 'not cute' trait. Speaking so softly, I wasn't sure she'd hear me, I confessed. "I've never been on a date."

Something flashed in her eyes, then she spoke. "Surely you dated in High School."

I shook my head, but didn't elaborate any further.

"Well I think it's time you did." She smiled and patted my hands.

"If you really want me to go, I'll go." I answered, though I wasn't sure why I did. I hate crowds, loud music and I don't drink, but if she asked me to, I'd step in front of a speeding bus. I was powerless to resist her.

"Goody." She giggled, almost like a little girl. "It'll be sooo much fun, you'll see."

Deep down I hoped she was right.

Again, her arm hooked in mine, she had me escort her back to her sorority house.

"I'll see you here Saturday, eight-ish, OK?" She beamed.

"Alright." I said, trying to sound excited, but terrified would be a better description. It was Wednesday, I had three days to either get my shit together or run screaming into the night. Running seemed the better choice.

Three days later, I found myself standing in front of Stephanie's sorority in my only suit (I didn't think to ask about a dress code) trying very hard not to puke. I'd managed to push everything down while I was in classes, but the reality of the here and now was almost more than I could handle. I was on the verge of losing it when the door swung open and Stephanie appeared.

"You coming in?" She smiled.

I nodded feebly and stumbled through the door.

Stephanie kissed my cheek and took my hand leading me to a set of double doors. "Wait here until we're announced, then I'll introduce you to my sisters."

I had no idea how any of this worked, so I did as she requested.

We waited for several minutes while a rather raucous crowd on the other side of the doors made a great deal of noise. I couldn't make out any words, but there was a lot of laughing and cheering. Whatever was happening seemed to be popular.

Then the doors opened and we were ushered inside. The room was huge. Well over a hundred people were watching as we entered. One of, what I presumed to be, Stephanie's sisters was standing on a small stage at the front of the room and motioned for us to come forward. "Ladies and Gentlemen, Chapter President Stephanie Riddle and Darrin Newkirk."

We walked up onto the stage and Stephanie turned to face the crowd, taking the microphone from her sister. "Thank You Courtney. I'd like to introduce you to Darrin Newkirk, my candidate for biggest loser on campus. This pathetic specimen has all the charm of menstrual cramps, the fashion sense of a colorblind eight year old and not only is this loser a virgin, he's never even had a date. No big surprise why. I'm confident he'll win this year's competition for me..."

I fled before she could say any more. I was stunned to say the least. I was hoping this was some kind of good natured roast, you know, a college prank, but as Stephanie continued her tirade and the venom in her words increased, it was clear this was no prank. One quick look in her eyes confirmed the horrible truth, she was enjoying this. All she wanted to do was win some stupid, demeaning contest. As the reality of what she did to me set in, I panicked. Full blown, absolute, blind running panic. I know I ran down, over or through more than one person on my way out, and I didn't care. I needed to be as far away from there as I could get. Right. Fucking. NOW!!

Bolting through the front doors, the cruel laughter of that room still ringing in my ears, I ran into the darkness. I ran. No direction or purpose other than to escape. When I could run no more, I collapsed rolling onto my back in the damp grass, sucking air into lungs that felt they were about to burst from my chest, then I lost it. I screamed. I yelled. I wanted to break things. Had I been able to get my hands on that fucking bitch, I think I might have killed her. I had been humiliated, laughed at and derided. That had happened before and while painful, it was nothing compared to the betrayal I felt at being duped by Stephanie. Some part of me was stupid enough to believe she might care for me.

Once I had collected myself, I rose, shivered at the sudden chill of the night and made my way home. I spent most of Sunday in a funk, but Monday morning I returned to campus. I had classes to attend and a future to build. I was completely unprepared for the reception I got. Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE knew. Most didn't say anything, but I could see it in their eyes. Several of the jocks got their jollies clapping me on the back with a "Hey King Loser".

After that, if I wasn't in class, I wasn't on campus. Socializing had never been high on my list, but total avoidance seemed to be the only way to salvage what little self-esteem I had left. I was deeply depressed, but I only needed a few more semesters. I would endure, as I always had. I hoped.

A little over a week after my life had been nuked, I was trying to get off campus after a particularly difficult exam when a voice caught my attention.

"Darrin." It called. "Slow down."

Unfazed, I continued. I wasn't about to indulge some idiots idea of fun and allow myself to be the butt of any more jokes.

"DAR...! OOF!" I heard behind me. Turning, I saw a girl sprawled on the grass, her books and papers scattered around her. Turning back, I helped her up.

"Are you OK?" I asked.

"Embarrassed, clumsy, stupid for running in these shoes, but OK." She smiled as I pulled her up. "You move pretty fast."

"Yeah, well I don't have much reason to stick around." I sneered. "If you're here to continue the humiliation, piss off. I'm going home." I was angry, certain she was going to say something unpleasant.

"I'm sorry." She said, sincerely.

"Come again?" I asked, whipping my head around to look in her eyes.

"I'm sorry they did that to you." She almost whispered. "It was mean and you didn't deserve it. Hell, nobody deserves to be treated like that. I'm ashamed to admit I was there. I was going to pledge that sorority. After I saw your reaction, it was clear you didn't have a clue. I left. I tried to catch you, but damn you're fast. I'm not pledging there or anywhere else for that matter. Now that I've seen how cruel they were to you, the other houses aren't much better. I won't have anything to do with that. I've been trying to catch you since then, but I'll say it again, Damn you're fast."

"So why do you feel the need to apologize?" I questioned. "You were just as surprised as I was, it seems."

"Not really." She looked down, suddenly sad. "I knew what the event was, but I thought it was going to be fun, you know, have a few laughs, nobody gets hurt. I was wrong. It's cruel to laugh at the expense of another persons feelings. I grew up a lot in those moments and I didn't like the person I saw looking back at me in the mirror anymore. I know I can't change what happened, but I'm here to take responsibility for my part in it. I'm genuinely sorry. I, for one, will never take part in anything like that again as long as I live. I hope you believe me. If there's anything I can do to make up for what I've done, just ask."

"You were a victim just as much as I was." I assured her. "I'm sure they passed it off as 'good fun' and 'if they can't take a joke' that kind of thing. I admire your courage. Admitting a mistake is hard. Owning that mistake is even more so. If you need my forgiveness, you have it. Please don't lose any sleep over it."

"How can you be so...?" She struggled for words.

"What?" I smiled. "You want me to yell at you, call you names? You're WAY too old to spank, besides, I'd never hit a girl."

She blushed. "Spank?"

My turn to blush. "Shit!, I'm sorry. I am angry about this, obviously. I need to think a little more before I rant."

"Actually, I'm happy to see you angry." She giggled. "It's a very normal reaction to what happened."

"Thank you Dr...." I paused. "I don't even know your name."

"Shasta Coleman." She grinned. "And it will be doctor someday. I'm a psych major."

Looking over Shasta's shoulder, I saw about half the football team approaching. "Sorry to cut this short, but my adoring public nears. I need to go."

She shot a quick look over her shoulder. "Humph. Wait here." She stomped off, directly at the jocks, stopping a few feet in front of them. "That's far enough boys." She glared.

"Step aside Missy, we have an appointment with His Majesty." One of them sneered.

"Try and get around me and see how it goes." She challenged.

Todd, one of the running backs, attempted to dart around her and before I could register movement, he was face down in the grass with her left knee between his shoulder blades. She leaned down and growled in his ear. "Next time I won't be so nice." She stood, glared at the rest of the team. "Next?"

All of them held up their hands and backed away slowly. "Nope" While not hasty, retreat they did, grumbling.

"That was amazing." I stared in awe. "That guy is nearly twice your size. How'd you do that?"

"Judge me by my size, do you?" She scowled, mimicking that famous Jedi Master.

"I judge you not, Oh great Yoda." I snickered. "Seriously, how?"

"My Dad is a martial arts instructor. I've been taking lessons as long as I can remember." She smiled. "Always been his number one student."

"Remind me not to make you angry." I chuckled.

"Don't make me angry." She deadpanned, trying to look serious then broke out laughing. "That was your only warning."

"You are quite something Shasta Coleman, quite something indeed." I praised.

She smiled. The kind of smile someone gets when a great weight has been lifted from them. "So have I redeemed myself, even a little?"

"That you have." I stated.

"Good. You hungry?" She asked.

"Yeah, why?" I said.

"Let's go, I'm buying." She grinned.

"But..." I attempted.

"Angry." She reminded, waiving a finger at me.

I relented.

After walking to my car, we made our way to a little Mexican place NOT near campus and ate and talked.

"OK, I might be opening old wounds here." She said, attacking a taco. "But how, exactly did you fall for that bitch?"

"You want the long story or the Cliff Notes?" I inquired.

"I want the whole enchilada." She laughed at her own joke.

"That was pretty clever." I admitted.

I told her my story.

I was a child prodigy, the youngest child and an oops baby. My mother was in her early forties when I was born. My next oldest sibling is eleven years older than me. My parents had no idea what to do with me. The one good thing was money. We weren't loaded by any means, but they could afford good schools and tutors and such. I sailed through school, graduating at fourteen. As you can imagine, I had no friends in school, I was so much younger than my classmates. We just didn't have anything in common. College wasn't any better. Yes I already have a degree. Actually, two. All in the field of computers and robotics. I'm here finishing a few classes for my third in A.I. Artificial Intelligence. As well as starting my PhD. I'm barely twenty and everyone here thinks I'm a Freshman. Surprise!! I have the social skills of a... well I just don't have any social skills. Interacting with people my own age is painful at best. The opposite sex, zilch, nada. Never had a date, as the ENTIRE campus is aware of, so when this stunningly beautiful girl flirted with me, my hormones overrode my brain and the results were less than satisfactory. Though, I should admit, not unexpected. I may be inept, but I'm not stupid. I knew it was all too good to be true. Mostly, I blame lack of blood flow to my brain.

Shasta almost snorted part of her taco through her nose at that bombshell.

"Aaaaand I probably shouldn't have said that." I apologized. "My filters only work intermittently."

"No, that's alright" She spasmed, trying to regain control. "I appreciate the honesty."

"That's my biggest problem, honesty." I admitted. "I'm honest, completely. I don't know how to be any other way. I know that's not how the world works and I frequently get taken advantage of because I can't tell when someone is lying to me. If they sound sincere, I believe them. Guess maybe I am stupid after all."

"No, please don't think that way." Shasta admonished, again stroking the back of my hands. "You should be able to trust other people. It's their fault that trust is broken, not yours."

"I just figured they'd be more mature." I lamented.

Shasta laughed. "Have you looked around here? It's basically a drunken orgy with a few classes thrown in so their parents will pay for it. Half the students here won't make it two years before they wash out. They lack the basic maturity and discipline to succeed. Maturity is a rare commodity."

"I'm finding that out." I moaned.

"Don't let it get to you." She said. "Once you're out of here, you'll never see any of them again. I don't see you hanging with washed up jocks and wanna-be trophy wives."

"Probably not." I agreed. "I spend more time with computers than people."

"Just don't forget me, OK?" She beamed. "I still have some bad Karma to absolve."

I nodded, finishing the last of my meal. "This is really good, thanks."

"No problem." She smiled. "Let me see your phone."

I handed her my phone and she poked at it briefly. Her phone buzzed, then she handed it back. "I put my number in. I have yours as well. If you need anything, even if it's only a sympathetic ear, call or text me. I mean it. You are not alone here. If you want or need a friend, I'm applying for the position."

"I won't lie." I stated. "A friend would be nice. I want to believe you, but recent events make that difficult. I don't think I can take that kind of hurt again."

"I won't hurt you Darrin." She twined her fingers in mine, temporarily overwhelming my fears. "And I'll be damned if I let anyone else either."

She paid for our meal and I drove her back to her dorm. Later that evening, at home, I was studying. Eris, my cat, was curled up in my lap, purring softly as I absentmindedly stroked her soft fur. She was probably the only living thing that had never disappointed me. She was very uncatlike in her affection for me. If I was home, she was in my lap or next to me. I sighed. At least she loved me.

My phone pinged, jolting me from my dark musings. Strange, I almost never get texts. My parents loathe texting and my siblings only text me for special occasions. I wasn't expecting any from my profs, so curious, I tucked Eris under one arm, rose and retrieved my phone from the charging dock on the kitchen counter.

Shasta: Hey!

Me: Hey yourself, something wrong?

Shasta: Just checking up on you.

Me: I'm good. Just studying and hanging out with Eris.

Shasta: Eris? Replaced me already?

Me: Eris is my cat.

Shasta: I love cats, send pic NOW!

I quickly snapped a couple shots of Eris and sent them.

Shasta: She's adorable! 'Cat Planet Cuties', right?

Now just how did she know that I wondered? I had discovered Anime when I was at my first college. It was an escape mechanism when things got too intense. Some of them are rather suggestive if not outright lurid, but I did like the characters in this one and the story was interesting.

Shasta: Earth to Darrin, come in please.

Me: Sorry. You are correct. I'm glad you can't see me blushing right now.

Shasta: I'm sure that's adorable as well. I love Anime, we'll have to swap stories sometime.

She likes Anime. How is that possible? Girls don't like Anime, I mean some of it is, well, pornographic.

Shasta: You're really bad at this aren't you? It works better if you respond.

Me: Sorry, lost in thought.

Shasta: About?

Me: Never met a girl that liked Anime.

Shasta: Surprise!! Probably won't be the last one either. There's more to me than you know.

Me: I'm finding that out.

Shasta: I'll let you go, just wanted to make sure you were OK. Give Eris some love for me.

Me: Appreciated, I will. She is an attention hog, so she'll be happy.

Shasta: Night Darrin.

Me: Good night Shasta.