Chapter 24
On Monday morning, I was racing to my locker after English and before Astronomy to switch my books. Getting rid of Moby Dick alone would improve my posture for the rest of the morning. I quickly dialed the combination and jerked the locker open, only to have it slam close again. Tommy Narburg was standing right next to me. The locker door had apparently banged off his forehead. Despite the dazed expression on his face, it didn't appear to have done any damage.
"Tommy?" I asked as I returned to the lock.
"Your sister asked me to the dance," he said in an odd monotone.
"Oh, yeah," I nodded, opening the door more slowly this time.
"Is she, um, okay?"
"Okay how?" I asked.
"Like, um..."
"Like is she firin' on all cylinders? Has she gone off the deep end? Is she serious about going to the Spring Formal with Tommy Narburg, or is this just some big practical joke?"
"Yeah. All that."
"Tommy, as far as I know, she's dead serious. She's been plannin' this since Saturday afternoon. I told her you might not be the one doing the asking."
"No kidding."
"You did say yes, didn't you?"
He just stared at me.
"Thought so," I smiled. "Got to go to class, man. Hey, I'm gonna go rent a tuxedo this afternoon after practice. You want to come?"
Tommy broke into a big grin. He ambled off down the hallway, banging into other kids' lockers in a sort of classical random Brownian motion. I watched him for a while, and then ran to class with a big smile on my face.
Tanya pulled me aside before lunch.
"I missed you this weekend," she said simply.
"I missed you, too," I said. "It was good to have a weekend apart, though, so I could learn just how much."
"So, um, you want to sneak out back and maybe get a...?"
"Hot dog?"
"Trick," she blushed.
"Seriously, I would love to get a hot dog with you," I said. "Any other day of the week. But if you miss lunch today, you'll never forgive me."
"Why?"
"Oh, let's not spoil the surprise. Coming?"
Tanya let me drag her to lunch, where I waited fifteen minutes to drop the news.
"Oh, Jeanne, I'm gonna need the car after school today," I said quietly. "Me and Tommy gotta pick out our tuxes."
It didn't matter how quietly I said it. Conversation stopped.
"Tommy?" Rabbit said. "Why do you need a tux, Tommy?"
Tommy had evidently taken a vow of silence. At the very least, he was having trouble getting any words out through the grin that was frozen onto his face. I gave him a minute or so, and then answered the question.
"The Spring Formal?" I suggested. "On Saturday? That's what formal means, Rabbit. What were you planning on wearing?
"What's Rabbit wearing?" I asked a grinning Cammie.
"Who's Tommy taking to the Spring Formal?" Rabbit interrupted me. We were cutting Tommy out of the conversation completely now.
"He decided to go with Jill," I said in a tone that suggested that Tommy had finished weighing his choices and come to a final decision.
"Jill Peterson?" Cammie asked doubtfully.
"Jill Peterson?" I scoffed. "As if."
Everyone laughed at my impersonation of the annoying Ms. Peterson. That girl's voice could peel the paint off a bridge. And what her voice didn't get, her cursing would finish.
I watched the gang look around the cafeteria. I watched as their eyes settled on Jill Fairchild, an attractive eleventh-grader who, to the dismay of any number of guys, had been in a steady relationship with Amy Constantine since the ninth grade. I watched them consider whether Tommy was going to serve as Jill's pretend date, which they correctly discarded as completely unnecessary. Gay and lesbian couples were perfectly welcome at school functions, and the Fairchilds and Constantines were well aware of their daughters' attachment.
It was Rabbit who caught on first.
"Sterling," he clutched at his chest, "tell me he's not going with your sister Jill."
"He's not going with my sister Jill."
"Yes I am!" Tommy found his voice and blurted out.
"I know," I turned to him. "But he asked me to tell him you weren't. I was afraid he was going to have a heart attack."
"Wait a minute," Rabbit held his hands to his head. "You mean to tell me that Tommy Narburg is going to the Spring Formal with the most b —"
"Rabbit," Cammie warned him.
"The most young sister you have?" Rabbit paused only a second.
Cammie turned to Jeanne and Tanya.
"See, girls. That's training," she pronounced with a satisfied smirk.
"That's all right," Jeanne smiled. "I know she's the most beautiful girl in the school."
"Present company excepted," Rabbit offered.
"Nice try, pal," I muttered. Jeanne, Cammie, and Tanya just threw potato chips at Rabbit.
"No, seriously," Rabbit turned back to the main issue. "Tommy's going to the Formal with your sister Jill?"
"You do know he's right here, don't you?" I asked.
"Yeah," Cammie smiled. "And now we understand that sappy look on his face. So I doubt we'll be able to get him to talk any more."
"True," I said. "But he can nod. Going to the Formal, Tommy?"
He smiled and nodded.
"Takin' my sister?"
He nodded some more, blushing to the roots of his hair.
"Jill, right? 'Cause you're goin' with Sammy, aren't ya, Jeanne?"
"I assume I'm going with Sammy," she said icily.
Tommy was off the hook for the moment. Now it was Sammy's turn. He actually looked a little pale.
"Yeah. You're coming with us to the tux place, aren't you, Sammy?" I asked.
"Um, yeah, sure. Thanks, Trick."
"Well, I guess Jill and I will see what's left in the bottom of the barrel at the department store," Jeanne huffed.
At dinner that evening, Tiffany asked me where Jeanne and Jill had run off to.
"In Jeanne's room," I said. "Doing something with some dresses they bought. For the spring Formal."
"Why are they so friendly now?" Dad asked.
"You mean since last Wednesday?" I asked, getting a glare from Tiffany for implying that Dad hadn't noticed for that long. Which he hadn't. "They traded parts in the school play."
"Why?" Tiffany asked.
"Jill remembered something that my mom said," I told her.
"What was it?" Tiffany looked genuinely interested, as if it were only now occurring to her that she was going to be a parent any minute, and had better start figuring out how to do it.
"'When it's your turn,'" I quoted.
"'You better be ready,'" my father finished with a smile.
I smiled back at him. I was inordinately pleased that he remembered. I turned back to Tiffany. She too was pleased, probably not with Dad remembering as much as with the way we were interacting.
"And its corollary," I added, "which was probably more important this week. 'If you're not ready, it's probably not your turn.'"
"I hadn't heard that one," Dad said, still with a big smile.
"It was at that amusement park we went to. You and Dave were trying to see who could ring the bell on the Strongman thing. Now, if you'll excuse me, I think I'll go check on the girls."
"When is the Formal?" Tiffany asked as I cleared my plate.
"Saturday night," I said. "Dave's visiting Liane so I guess you guys will have the place to yourselves."
I waggled my eyebrows at them. I wasn't sure how Dad would spend a free Saturday night with his own private five and a half foot tall bowling ball, but that was up to them, right?
"Actually," Tiffany smiled, "if I haven't given birth by then they're going to induce it on Saturday evening or Sunday morning."
"Neat," I returned her smile. "Well, gosh. We should be with you then."
"And take you away from your Senior Formal?" Tiffany laughed. "I'll be the evil stepmother for the rest of my life. If there's a problem, we'll call you. Otherwise, you can just come on Sunday afternoon."
"Okay," I agreed. "Say hi to little Brittany for us."
Jeanne had picked up a beautiful strapless dress. Jill, bless her heart, had decided on a more conservative look.
"Can you believe Sammy?" Jeanne said disgustedly. "Did he at least pick out a nice tux?"
"Yeah, but Jeanne..." I said.
Her attention caught by the tone in my voice, she stopped fidgeting with the dress and looked up.
"You want me to leave?" Jill asked.
"We're a family," I shook my head. "Secret, though, right?"
"Pinky swear," both girls said in unison as they held up their littlest fingers. I smiled. It felt really good to be the Sterlings again.
"Jeanne, I loaned him the money to rent the tux," I said. "And to pay for the tickets and a room. You've been to his house, right?"
"Oh, God," Jeanne had turned as white as a sheet.
"Yeah," I said. "That's why he hadn't asked you before."
She was beginning to tear up.