CHAPTER 1
Just before midnight six male businessmen and a young presenter attending a three-day conference on (big breath)'Empowering Executives to Accept Their Role in Collective Responsibility' decided to have one last drink before heading to their hotel.
With wait staff assisting cleaning behind the bar the oldest man in the group, Perry Taylor, went to the bar to order. He asked Bernie Bader, the presenter who'd that day had spoken about ten dynamic ways to consolidate the team, to help carry back used glasses and empty beer bottles.
Curly blond Bernie collected the six bottles and two of the glasses and grinned, weaving slightly, "Can you managed the reminder Perry?"
"Fine, follow me slave," Perry slurred.
Bernie had placed the six bottles held against his chest by one arm and the glasses from his other hand on the bar when balding Perry, rarely anything but charming, attempted to slip in the gap but bumped a guy standing with two others at the bar.
"Watch it you jerk."
"Sorry but I doubt I'm the jerk."
"Calling me a jerk are you," snarled the guy and threw a punch that Bernie he anticipated. He stepped between the two men and jolted the blow off-course with a forearm.
"You hurt my arm punk."
"My apologies," Bernie smiled. "The contact with you was unintentional and the slight was rather provoked."
"What's a slight?" bellowed the aggressor.
"Jake it will be what you feel if I hit you with this," said the woman behind the bar, holding up a baseball bat.
Jake reached over and grabbed the bat from her.
"Welcome to the world of sore heads you jerks," he said, drawing back the bat to swing at Perry who stood frozen, mouth open in shock.
Bernie, in suit and jacket, leapt and kicked under the descending bat into the belly of the guy, knocking the assailant into his friends who caught him and restrained him, not that restraint was necessary because the guy was sucking in air as if on his last gasp.
"Our apologies for being involved in disturbing the peace," Bernie soothed handing the bat back to the barmaid. "Nothing broken and here's a hundred for you guys not to take this incident any further. We're off now, thanks for your service."
Jake hurried back to the table and said, "Come on guys, let's go. We must give Bernie twenty each and I owe him greater thanks. My head, it could have been cracked."
* * *
Three months later Dyan Taylor was in the elevator glaring at a guy and a woman staring at her breasts. What kind of weirdoes where they? Why couldn't they be like the blond guy looking up at the ceiling? She looked up and saw a spider and closed her eyes shuddering.
The duo who she thought had been thinking about asking her to join her for night-play left at the next floor, both grinning at her like apes.
Now the good looking guy was looking at her breasts. God, other women had breasts. Why didn't he look at them? Well she had to concede she and the guy were alone in the elevator. Perhaps she should ask what he thought of them?
The elevator stopped at the reception floor to her office and he moved to exit but held the hold door open button.
"Good morning ma'am?"
"It's miss," Dyan all but snarled.
"Miss you have dripped toothpaste between your... your ums."
The guy smiled apologetically and left.
Dyan was aghast, looking down the front of her black shirt. It was true. Toothpaste was splattered between her, er, 'ums'. Her what? She giggled as held her handbag against her chest at the next floor and hurried to the bathroom.
Almost an hour later her father appeared with the blond guy in toe. He looked at her 'ums' and winked approvingly, presumably because the toothpaste had disappeared and the material had dried. But one can never tell with men. Perhaps he just approved.
"Hi darling, this is Mr Bader who will be with us for three months to examine our entire operation and to recommend practical ways to streamline and improve productivity. Bernie this is my daughter Dyan."
"Um, um. How lovely to meet you Dyan."
Dyan's face flamed and her father asked was she okay.
"Yes perfectly," the 30-year-old brunette said icily.
"Well I'm placing another desk in this office for Bernie. I should have said something but it didn't come up."
"It didn't come up because you forgot to discuss it with me."
"Other matters are more important around here darling than who sits where."
Dyan felt ready to hunt, hit and destroy but before she could fire the newcomer said smoothly, "Perry name me one thing more important than your daughter?"
Perry stood scratching his head instead of telling the guy to get lost. Her father then grinned and said, "My wife?"
The three of them laughed and Dyan realized she'd been expertly defused. Oh wasn't he just adorable?
Perry looked at his watch and asked, "What do you think about office-sharing with Dyan not you have met my fiery daughter?"
The cur smiled and said, "Dyan is production manager. I was wondering why her office is not down in the plant, ideally being elevated so she can see and be seen?"
"Well whatever," Perry said. "You sort that out with Dyan but don't ruffled her. I have a meeting. I'll leave you in her capable hands Bernie."
Dyan stood glaring at Bernie who appeared mystified and asked what?
"If you don't know already you'll never know," she snorted knowing he never would.
"Fetch us coffee please Dyan and let's talk about it. My turn to get coffee next time we have it together."
God he was smooth. Before she'd had time to thunder and tell him to get his own fucking coffee he was declaring he'd get the next one, signaling he didn't expect her to be a mule. She handed him coffee and didn't invite him to sit and she stood, two arm lengths clear of him.
"May I say something personal?"
She nodded knowing he was about to apologize for attempting to relocate her in the plant.
"You are very beautiful."
Dyan felt her chest begin to tighten and her stomach pulled in involuntarily. God, her body was preparing to have sex with him! The jerk had nailed her: how the hell could she reject being called beautiful and now he was staring at her breasts. Where they really swelling that much? No that was impossible.
"I don't want you touching me," she shrilled.
"What?"
"Never touch me."
"Do you mean never touch your hand or does your thinking go much deeper and are you thinking groping?"
She gurgled, "P-please tell my about yourself."
The résumé was over in four minutes and then he said, "Now tell me about yourself including why you are paranoid about being touched."
"Paranoid? I like being touched... oh god. I'm so... oh fuck, saved by the bell. Here comes your desk."
"Is the f-word allowable around here?"
"No but tolerance is given to hot-headed women with visitations of paranoia."
"Good heavens, what a wonderful combination for a woman who yearns for release."
Her brain almost disabled by his intensity, Dyan yelled to the two men, "The desk, over here!" At that moment Christy from HR arriving to induct the newcomer. Dyan managed to kick back into gear and thought Christy was practically devoid of breast development... the guy was forced to appraise her by her legs.
She heard the smooth-ass reply to the introduction, "Christy? Was your father a count?"
"That was Monte Christo, not Monte Christy," the head of HR giggled.
Dyan closed her eyes momentarily and groaned as if about to vomit.
"Are you okay Dyan?"
"Never better thank you Christy. Have Bernie all day or all week if you wish... er... if you need him then longer."
"Why thank you."
Dyan saw Christy looking at Bernie's wide chest and wondered what Christy was thinking. There were rumors that at times Christy suspended her marriage vows.
When they'd disappeared and the men had placed the second desk where she wanted it and added two filing cabinets and they'd left, Dyan called Leigh.
"Mom, I have a man in my office."
"Oh lucky you. May I have him as a discard?"
"Mom, stop being silly. Dad has brought in this work efficiency and management consultant to run through our operation with a fine tooth comb."
"I would have thought that was both sensible and desirable."
"Perhaps, but daddy has placed the jerk with me in my office and the jerk has already said why isn't my office above the floor of the plant."
"Oooh, that appears good thinking. Get a male production manager and find yourself a role in planning and debit control if you wish to justify remaining in the office suite."
"Mom, that's a great idea. Not debtors though because that is soul-destroying work."
"Go for the position of general manager then. You think that woman's a jerk."
"Yes mom but unfortunately it's likely where this guy Bernie is heading if he wants permanent employment."
"Well fight him for it; you always have loved to scrap."
"Mom that's brilliant. I must buy you a present."
"Thank you dear. Bring the jerk home for dinner tonight to allow me to make my assessment."
"Er mom, he'll only stare at your boobs."
"Oh great, I need someone who does that."
Dyan groaned. "Mom, I don't wish to mislead you. He is handsome and could be brilliant."
"Oh god, that's why you are behaving erratically like this? You know he's the one."
"Mom, don't be so fucking ridiculous."
When her mom stopped laughing she said, "Ah, that foul mouthing tells me I'm right. Wheel him in tonight darling."
Dyan threw down her phone and kicked her trash bin across the room, hurting her toe.
She mouthed obscenities and was surprised she knew so many of them.
* * *
Leigh called down the passage to the bedrooms, "He's arriving darling."
"Please get the door mom; I'm still dressing."
Perry was glued to a sports report on TV.
Leigh checked her hair in the hallway mirror and opened the door to be greeted by Mr Flowers.
"These are for you ma'am."
"Oh, thank you. These are out of season... there was no need."