**So just exactly what is Kayla's problem?
Vote if you want to, and comments are always welcome. O_o
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Kayla was a bit slow getting up, and eventually Jillian wandered into her room to wake her. Kayla stretched as she sat up and hugged her niece.
"Good morning, Jilly. I love you, honey." She looked over at Jillian's constant companion. "And I don't want to forget Daisy," she said, running her hand over Daisy's head and chest. Daisy licked her forearm in reply.
Jillian kissed her, and said, "'Morning Kayla, I love you too." She looked at her aunt a little sideways.
"What?" asked Kayla.
"You don't usually hug me that tight every day. I like it, but you're acting weird." Jillian said.
"I was thinking that I don't show you that I love you often enough. I'm going to do that more from now on," said Kayla. "I'm pretty lucky to have you."
Jillian still looked at her aunt a little suspiciously.
"You kissed him, didn't you?"
Kayla nodded.
Jillian screwed up her face, "That's just icky. You probably got his germs or something."
Kayla chuckled, "Yes I did, honey, and it was pretty nice."
She smiled and then laughed. "I got in so late last night that I just went to sleep, and since kissing Joshua goodnight was the last thing that I did before I went to bed, now you've got them too since you just kissed me."
Kayla smirked with satisfaction. "So there."
"EWWWwww! Jillian cried, and ran out of the room to let Kayla get dressed. Daisy followed after with furrowed skin on her forehead. She didn't know what the noise had been for, but it was probably going to mean fun.
As she wandered to the house for breakfast, Kayla saw no sign of Joshua, and since he was missing from the table on the porch, she asked Rose where he was.
"He's gone, honey. He got up and made some phone calls, and then he went for his run. He likes to do that before it gets warm, although sometimes he times it so that he is running in the heat, I don't know why." Rose answered, "Oh, I just remembered that you won't need curtains. I've got some in the attic. I'll bring them down, and I ought to be able to get them to fit those windows without too much fuss."
Jillian finished her breakfast and wandered away to play with Daisy.
Kayla dug in to her breakfast while her aunt went to the kitchen to pour herself another cup of coffee. She overfilled it and walked back out carefully as she sipped to lower the level.
Rose sat down and looked at her niece, "So you and Joshua enjoyed yourselves?" she asked.
Kayla wondered slightly at the inflection that her aunt had used. It didn't seem like so much of a question as much as a statement of fact.
"Yes Aunt Rose, I had a wonderful time, once I got past my hair trigger. I don't know why I did it, but I hurt Josh with some things that I said."
She worked at cutting a piece of bacon. "I actually made him cry. I felt awful about that. Anyway, he calmed me down, and then I really cried a lot, it seemed like everything just sort of came out then."
Rose waited while her niece chewed and then Kayla continued. "I mean everything, and he just held me and cried with me, when he should have probably just taken the crazy lady back here and been done with me."
Rose nodded. She'd known that her niece had been carrying a bit of a load recently. She sighed, hoping that Kayla would feel better now. It sure looked that way to her as Kayla went on.
"He told me that he loves me, Aunt Rose. I guess I just couldn't accept that from anyone." She smiled, "I'm not sure why he would, but I know that he does, and ... I love him too," she said. "A lot."
"I know, I saw him this morning." said Rose, smiling, "But did he help you with your problems, dear?"
"Yes, and no." Kayla answered, "We made love and I never knew that anyone could do the things that he did to me. That was really wonderful, and the best part was that I actually wanted to."
She sat back as though something had just come to her. "I think for the first time in my life, I really meant it, because I knew that he loves me.
He loves me, Aunt Rose. No bullshit or deviousness. He makes me wonder how I ended up with the idiots that I've known until him. That's a strange thing to come to grips with, it's sure never happened to me before."
"Well that's wonderful," Rose said, "and I'm so happy for the two of you, you don't know how much, but what I meant was, did he help you with your OTHER problem?"
Kayla dipped a corner of her toast into an egg yolk. "He made me feel so much better, but even so, he didn't see anything. We were in his truck like a couple of teenagers, and that was fun, but the windows are dark, and I checked carefully first so that I knew that he couldn't see me." Kayla said.
"I could just barely make out his shape. I couldn't see my bracelet or any of his tattoos, so I knew I was safe, and then I guess I just let go on him." She smiled at the thought. "It felt great to be able to do that.
But it does leave me with a problem though. I love him and I trust him now, so I'm going to have to find a way to prepare him for what I look like in the light. And I've made the decision to do that."
Kayla looked off to the horizon on her right a little as she thought. "It's not going to be easy, but if he can get past it, then I guess we've got a real shot. If he can't, I won't blame him, and I guess I'll have a few good memories."
Kayla looked a bit wistful at the thought. "It will be his decision, and we'll both have to live with it, I guess."
Rose looked a little uncomfortable but went ahead with her thought. "Kayla honey, I've told you before, that you're making far too much of it. You're carrying it around like it was a heavy weight. It's not bad, believe me, but it's up to you to decide how to proceed from here, since you're this close. If I can offer you some advice, be a little mindful toward Joshua. He's built strong shields to protect his feelings, and now that he loves you as you say, he's as vulnerable as you, ok? I think you saw that last night from what you're telling me. If he didn't care, there's no way that he would ever cry. I've seen him when he was smarting because some fool woman had misjudged him, and all it did was piss him off."
Kayla nodded thoughtfully before sipping her coffee. "Ah, you mean me, right?"
Rose continued, "No, Kayla. I think that you'd admit that you've fallen in love with him. I'm talking about something else. It has happened that unlike you, there have been a couple that have fallen in love AT him, trying to sweep him off his feet, so to speak. You'd think that might be a little funny to watch, but it's not.
Some women like the bad boy type. A lot of women only think that they like bad boys and go after them." she said, her expression turning to a slight smirk. "And then they wonder why the bad boys that they wanted so badly just keep kicking them around.
Well Joshua isn't like that, as you know, but he looks like the type to some. When one of them figured out that he's not a hard case in the road house out on the highway, well, it got ugly. Josh hadn't dropped his guard like he has now, and he gave that girl both barrels in the same public place where she had tried to ridicule him for trying to politely disengage himself. Her brother, the bouncer, took offense at Joshua's treatment of his sister's honour, which along with her modesty she never seemed to have missed before by the way. Josh tried to get clear and even apologized, but by then, that wasn't really what either of them wanted to hear.
Anyway, the bouncer woke up at the opposite end of the bar. He hit Joshua only once, and Josh took it from there. It took Joshua two seconds to do that, too. Now they just leave him alone. I was very proud of him." she chuckled.
"Um, I'm just thinking, Kayla, was there ever a time last night when Joshua was behind you?"
"No, ... wait!" She thought about it. "Actually there was. Aunt Rose, I don't know if you can understand it, and I'm not sure that I can, but I kind of passed out. Josh said I was out for about three minutes. I remember that I was facing him, ...well sort of anyway, and then when I came to, I was on my front. I don't know how I got that way, but it doesn't matter. He couldn't see anything anyway."
Rose smiled and explained, "Sam could do that to me sometimes. He told me that he tried to tell Joshua how to do that once. I guess it was as close as those two ever came to a father-son talk. But he told me that when he tried to explain it, Joshua told him that he already knew about it. And in that case, you're very lucky. Most men don't put much into what I think you were doing. He obviously does, because it's a lot of work for the man with no physical gratification. He must have put his heart into it."
She smiled, "We must share more than a few genes, just as Joshua said on Friday, because it's a rare thing. The one thing that Sam taught Joshua was to make sure the woman could breathe. So Joshua must have turned you over as Sam told him to" she paused before she went on.
"Did Joshua tell you that he loved you AFTER that point, or before?" asked Rose.
"Both," answered Kayla, "Aunt Rose, what does that have to do with anything? I've told you I don't know how many times now that he couldn't see me!"
Rose looked out at the mountains in the distance. She smiled warmly, and looked back at Kayla with moistened eyes. "Oh, it has everything to do with it. What it means honey, is that Joshua is already farther past your problem than you are. He's seen you."