A Love Lost Found

Well, that was that. The last log- the huge campfire seemed to rise to the sky, or at least to the Zip-line, our goal. We had toiled for ages, it seemed, over those logs. We were both misfits in a summer camp full of Jocks- twelve year old theater kids who loved the outdoors. It seemed that everyone else in that place thought that I was a dyke because of my love for camping, and everyone thought Stevie was "gay", put into nicer terms then they did back then, because he loved acting and singing. It wasn't a big deal that I liked to sing, because that made me like Britney Spears, and Stevie could love roughing it without say because it was "manly." Well, we knew better, ourselves.

Stevie and I wouldn't have ever let ourselves onto the fact that this campfire was started to find something to do during free play. You see, everywhere else were the kids who spent summer after summer delighting in making us feel like shit. So, we found a place where no one would be, and made it our own.

My bunkmates had "Set me up with Stevie," as far as that could go with two twelve year olds. They did it mainly because it would be funny to watch the two weirdos hanging out, but we didn't care. Their heartless banter, this time, gave birth to something special.

I looked into Stevie's eyes, then, and I could see his heart, and mine, in that gaze. I knew, in that moment, that this would be one of our last moments together. He lived 8 hours away from me, and he was not returning to camp the following year. The bullies had gotten to be too much for him. I had decided to tough it out, and return for another summer.

Not knowing what to say, I put into the words the only thing I could at the moment- the campfire. "It seems to go on forever, doesn't it?" I said, smiling warmly at the boy I was technically dating, but was really only very, very close friends with.

Stevie, though, knew exactly what to say, he always did. To that simple line, he said simply, "Like our friendship." At the simple beauty of that line, a tear rolled slowly down my cheek, and forever understanding, Stevie pulled me into a tight hug.

"Sam, this will never be over." He whispered, "Never. We will go on forever. As long as I can breathe, I will be there for you. I'm just a phone call, a plane flight away." I squeezed him tighter, never wanting this moment to end, for him to leave my side. But in my heart I knew I had to let him go.

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Memories of the past hit my mind like a shock, hurling it backwards, delving into memories longed for but long buried. Stevie, my mind wondered as I stared at the newspaper clipping. A list of names was all it was, with the title "Long Island Music Students Honored in All-State Groups" glaring across it. My name and school district were there- Sam Schwartz (Plainview) - right in alphabetical order, where they should be. What caused the shock was another name on the page- Steven Cohen (Long Beach). Sure, Steven Cohen is a relatively popular name, Long Island having such a high Jewish population and all. But could 'Steven Cohen (Long Beach)'... be Stevie? My Stevie?

Stevie had stopped responding to my calls after a year or so. I got back from camp one year, and suddenly all contact broke. Could he have moved to the Island? Is that why he never returned my calls for all these years?

"Don't be stupid," I told myself, shaking my head. What are the chances? You're seventeen, for god's sake. He was from five years ago, the past. That didn't stop the tear that dropped down my face though, and I wiped it off, chuckling at my stupidity.

My little terrier cocked her head at me, wondering who I was talking to, and I rubbed her head, scratching her behind the years. Wagging her tail and jumping onto my lap, Bailey kissed my nose and let out a tiny bark. For some reason, she had an odd sense at knowing when I was upset. "Love ya, Bailey." I said, as, seeing I was in a better mood, she jumped down on the floor and promptly asked for a tummy rub. I happily obliged, then went upstairs to practice my music again. The trip to New York City for All-State was after all, tomorrow.