A Lesson Learned

She is sitting at the computer and wondering what it is that her husband does so late every night. She doesn't know where to begin but she knows she has to find out. She is a little afraid, as the questions roll in her mind. The thoughts are making her tremble, "what if I find something I don't want to find?" she says aloud into the silence of the empty room. She knows he goes into the chat rooms but what is it that he does there?

The chat icon is calling to her 'click here' it says in her mind so she does.

At first, the rolling lines of the room do not make sense to her, so she just watches. She realizes that the "asl" that people keep typing in the room means age, sex, location, so she types hers into the room. At first, she doesn't see a response, then someone types "hi" and ask her about her profile. She explains that it is her husbands name and that she doesn't have a name of her own. She isn't even sure if she knows how to make one.

He tells her it's ok and that he has a picture if she wants to see what he looks like. She thinks about it a minute and types into the room "sure why not." When the email arrives, she is a little afraid to open it. As she watches the picture open onto the screen, she sees a rather heavy man with no shirt; she laughs to herself and wonders what she is supposed to say. When he sends her and instant message, she just types in "nice."

He types, "Do you have a pic?"

She answers back "I am new to this. This is my first time in a chat room and you are the first person I have talked to online. I am sorry I don't have a picture."

He is very sweet and she doesn't have the heart to tell him that she really isn't attracted to him, so she keeps typing in the little box. It is just everyday chitchat really "how are you?," "are you married?," "do you have kids?," and "where are you from?"

They talk for about 10 minutes when he finally gets around to what's on his mind. The ding of the incoming message has become familiar to her and when the ding comes, again it is an unfamiliar question. "So... what do you have on?" he has typed into the little box.

She laughs to herself and looks down at her comfortable sweats and favorite tee, but types into the little box "jean skirt and a red tank."

When the ding comes, again the words in the box are just "mmmmm."

She laughs again and watches as the words pop into her box "how short is the skirt?"

She lies once again and types, "Mini."

Again, the ding brings words that make her smile, "what's under the skirt?"

She types back another lie, "nothing."

She thinks to herself that this is kind of fun and wonders if this is what her husband does online almost every night. Is there more or is this it?

The man on the other side of this cyber conversation types back, "take your top off."

She types back, "ok."

He types back, "I am naked and playing with myself."

She types back, "Really?"

When the box dings again, it says, "Really do you want to see?"

She is somewhat shocked and again she lets out a giggle. She types, "Sure why not."

"K brb" appears in the box, she is confused but types back, "ok." She has no idea what k brb means and she doesn't want to sound stupid so she doesn't ask. When he comes back he types, "Ygm." Now she is really confused and has to ask, "YGM? What does that mean?" He answers, "You've got mail (YGM)."

She tells him thank you and opens the email. She closes her eyes to keep from looking and waits a few minutes before she is brave enough to reopen them. When she does, she pushes her chair back and covers her mouth to keep from laughing aloud. The picture is of a completely nude man. He is holding his hard on in one big meaty hand and grinning at her. She has no idea what she is supposed to say now. "Oh my God" she whispers into her hand as it continues to cover her mouth.

He tells her that he is so hard and he needs to cum. She has never been exposed to anything like this before and doesn't think today is the day for her to start. She types into her box, "I don't think I want to do this" and clicks the box closed.

The box pops up and in it he has typed, "But baby I need you!"

She clicks the box closed again and laughs, thinking "how can he possibly need me, he doesn't even know me." The idea is ridiculous, needing someone that you have never met. When he doesn't IM her again she sighs with relief and leaves that chat room.

She continues her search for what it is that her husband finds so interesting about this cyber life. When she stumbles across a room called Cyber Openly. She realizes immediately that this room is different. This was the room she was going to learn what it is that her husband did every night.

She enters and types into the room, "35/f/MS" and waits to see if anyone answers.

The first answer is from a man that called himself Rampage, "hello WolfsNight." The next was from a person named JazminT, "Hi Wolf, why do you have a male s/n and you say you are female?"

She types back, "It is my husband's computer and his s/n. I guess I need my own name."

Jazmin types back a child like, "uh huh."

She explains that she doesn't know how to do that and ask if someone could possible explain to me what it is that she has to do. The lol's flow through out the room and she blushes.

She types, "I am new to all of this; tonight's my first time online in a chat room." Someone types, "aol virgin, lol," and she turns bright red, glad that no one can see her.

When the IM box pops up, she braces herself for another sexually starved man. The IM only says, "Are you really a woman on your husband's name?" The IM is from Rampage.

She smiles to herself, sensing the difference in this man. He asked her for nothing, just explaining to her how to make her name and how to make her profile. He helped her choose her name. When it was done, she smiled to herself again.

When the familiar ding came, again it was Rampage or Ramp, as he liked to be called. He had typed into the box, "may I add you to my buddy list?"

She typed back, "Yes please do and thank you so very much for all your help."

He types, "Yw" and goes back to the room.

Now armed with a screen name of her own and an unfinished profile, she rejoins the room and its light banter and easy conversation. She feels more confident because she now has a name of her own to hide behind. She has become KandiKan2...

Kandi's profile only says: blonde w/green eyes ~~ 5'5" 125lbs ~~ married ~~ new to cyber land...

Kandi returns to the room and types "35 f Mississippi... Hello room" and receives five IM's but she does not answer any of them because she knows she shouldn't feel bad if she doesn't.

Ramp is in a conversation with Jazmin, so Kandi just reads the room with a small comment every occasionally. The conversation turns to sex and Kandi types "is this how it always is here?"

Ramp types, "Here yes usually, in other rooms no."

This is what she was looking for she thought to herself, the reason her husband is so fascinated with cyber life.

Everyday she goes to this room and she meets new people but always she thinks of Rampage. Every time he comes to the room, her heart skips a beat. Every time he speaks to her, she wants him more. She lies to her husband so he won't know about her fascination with this man. They have become very close and now he wants to see her on cam. She has a cam but she is scared. She has his picture and he isn't super handsome but he is very sexy. The cam thing is scary because you can't hide things on cam like you can in a still picture. He might not like her.

They have cybered many times but now he wants to see her. Ramp has asked her everyday for a week and Kandi has denied him, she is out of excuses and it is hard to say no to him. Finally, one morning she gives into him and turns her camera on. To her surprise, he tells her how beautiful and sexy she is and that he just wants to see her, nothing more. Before she knows it, she is naked, standing in front of the camera in her den. Scared that he will see something he doesn't like about her, she blushes from head to toe.

Ramp turns his mic on and his voice is like liquid heat melting Kandi. She can't help herself; she is blinded to all when he speaks. He says in a soft voice heavy with what she reads as desire, "Baby, let me see all of you."

Kandi does as he wants and moves the camera so he can see everything. She watches herself on the computer screen, the scene playing out there seems far away and she blushes as she watches herself. He tells her what he wants and she does it. His voice has her mesmerized, controlling her with the powers of seduction. He could tell her anything and she would believe him. While she does what he asks of her, she is enthralled in the passion he brings to her, she can hear his passion over the speakers, and then he says only one word "Kandi." With that sound, he pushes her over the edge and she sinks in her own passion that leaves her drained.

She hears him say, "What's your name?"

In a voice heavy with passion, she whispers, "Nicole."

"Randy" he tells her.

"What?" she asks him.

"My name, its Randy." he says his voice calm.

"Oh," she says as she tries to stop trembling.

She starts to get dressed, her hands still trembling. Her mind racing wildly, she goes over everything that has just happened. "Oh my God, I can't believe I did that!" she thinks to herself. She buttons her blouse and wonders why he is so quiet. "Ramp, did you leave?" she says into the mic. When she gets no answer, a single tear falls silently down her cheek. She turns the cam off and clicks the box closed.