Let me tell you a tale about an octopus, otherwise known as a professor, and a mermaid, otherwise known as a student.
The mermaid had taken two classes from this professor. It had gone well enough during the first class. She got to know him by the end of the first quarter. Well, she thought she got to know him.
By the second class, she thought to herself, "AHA! How nice that he is such a kind person. Gee, maybe he can help me navigate my way through the maze otherwise known as the world of law. PERFECT!! After all he is my professor. He even seems to want to guide me through the murky waters ahead. How nice of him...."
Well, it turns out this nice professor was an octopus who's tentacles had a way of wandering where they shouldn't.
When it first happened the mermaid thought to herself, "HHMMM, that's most peculiar, must have been a mistake. There is no possible way my favorite octopus, otherwise known as my professor, could have meant to brush his hands against my ass. And I know he definitely didn't mean to brush his crotch so closely to my ass that I could feel the fishing pole that he keeps in his pocket."
When it happened a second time, well, she quickly cut off access to said octopus. Why upset the Marine Conservation Society by making calamari out of said octopus? She decided to just stay away and leave well enough alone.
It was tough for the mermaid. Law is a funny thing. It's hard, confusing and difficult, especially if you don't often swim in those murky waters. Dangerous waters, the law is, full of sharks, and octopus and other creepy crawly sea creatures.
The mermaid had just one other friend who was knee deep in the waters known as the law. Well, he wasn't just knee deep in it. He was actually also trying to keep his own head above water most of the time. He really couldn't help the mermaid much (no fault of his own), so this pretty much left her swimming on her own, and feeling as if she wasn't going to make it to the other side of the vast ocean.
Well, feeling as if one is all alone is difficult. It's hard to navigate blindly. It's probably what caused this mermaid to take the octopus' next hook line and sinker. Or was it his whopper of a whale tale? No matter. It seems as if this octopus had an affinity for lunch. One day he invited the mermaid to lunch.
"HHHMMM" thought the mermaid, "Should I trust him? Can I trust him? What if his tentacles go astray?"
She continued to debate, to wonder all on her own. As I mentioned, she really didn't have too many other sailors she could ask for navigation advice.
She continued to tread the dangerous waters all on her own. She soon grew tired and decided she ought to take the risk of going to lunch with the octopus, otherwise known as her professor. If it worked out she wouldn't have to carry such a big burden all on her own. If she was wrong she figured she could handle the tentacles on her own. She did it once before she could do it again and come out unscathed. Or so she thought. You could say our mermaid was a bit of an optimist. HA! She would learn soon enough....
It seems as if the octopus was a vegetarian. He told her about this lovely little restaurant that had a great vegetarian burger.
"Why, as a matter of fact it's even located right across the street from the beautiful aquarium in which I swim." he said.
Imagine that! How fortunate for our octopus and mermaid. He told her to meet him at the restaurant. It made her feel a bit better. I mean, what could go wrong in such a public and crowded location?
Turns out this restaurant was truly charming, but very dimly lit. They sat at a small little booth way in the corner. She really should have known where this was headed when he sat on her side of the booth.
As you can probably imagine (since I am the one telling this tale) our little excursion into the murky waters also known as lunch didn't go as well as our mermaid had hoped it would. It actually ended quite miserably.
