Part One - The Ensemble
āAre the socks ready?ā
āOui Monsieur.ā
āPut them on the tray in the Hall.ā
I watched the maid leave the room. By heaven even I was turned on, that tiny skirt and those fishnet tights tottering into the Hall on stiletto heels. Two days getting ready, two days! Still, itās what he wanted. No one could ādressā the French Maid like Paul, others had tried and not even come close to his ability to transform himself. Of course it helped if you had legs like a ballet dancer ā actually he is a fucking ballet dancer ā his āboureeā is going to take on a whole new meaning tonight.
āAdele, where are you?ā
āIn the Library darling.ā
I walked across the Dining Room and into the Library. Adele, naked as usual, was perched on the arm of the leather sofa toasting the fanny in front of the fire pretending to read a book. The lengths this girl goes to for effect. I had to agree she looked stunning, golden hair fluffed around her shoulders, firelight dancing across her thighs, glinting off her bouffant pubes, what does she do, backcomb them?
āWhy arenāt you dressed, we donāt have much time?ā
āThat costume is so hot darling.ā
āWell youāre not going to get any cooler standing there, pretending to read.ā
āIām not pretending.ā She pouted.
āAdele, itās a picture book, itās upside down.ā
āOh. Is it? I cannot see anything without my glasses. Ok, you caught me. Canāt we just play āhide the sausageā one more time before the Gentlemen arrive, itās been nearly an hour since my last snack.ā
āAdele!ā
āYes Michael?ā
āGo and get dressed, if you are a good girl tonight we can play āhide the sausageā and ātoad in the holeā all day tomorrow. Have you seen Grand Mama?ā
āMichael.ā She mewed, āI donāt have to go with that horrible Mr Gibbs if I donāt want to, do I? He smells so awful, heās always blowing stinky poos and blames my sweet Muffin, and you know as well as me, my Muffin is never stinky poos.ā
āAdele, are we talking about the cat?ā
āMichael, you are silly sometimes. My Muffin, my sweet little pussy, Muffin. Not my muffin, that so badly wants a nice hot sausage between its lips. Canāt we just⦠quickly now, look its all nice warm and toasty for you.ā
āAdele, thatās enough. The Gentlemen pay very handsomely for the entertainment we provide for them. God knows we need the money after Grand Papa lost the family fortune on that ridiculous wager, Grand Mama has always been very adept but any fool would see that even she could not take on the entire Caerphilly Cheese Rolling Consortium single handed. Well not in the one hour time limit.ā
āI thought she did very well Michael, you must not blame Grand Mama, she managed forty two and another six would have seen her home and dry. Well not dry exactly. She said it was the dreadful smell of the cheese, she just couldnāt concentrate.ā
āAnd what did Grand Papa do in his shame? Threw himself off the tower; he couldnāt even do that right, crashed straight through glass roof of the Billiard Room and impaled himself on Paulās billiard cue.ā
āYes, but at least he died with a smile on his face.ā
āAdele, go and get dressed, put your costume on and check to make sure the village girls are ready. And Adele, keep your legs off the Butler. I do not want a repeat of last monthās shameful episode with the champagne bottle. Iām going to find Grand Mama.ā
Adele slid out of the room; she doesnāt walk exactly, but moves like she is grinding a sausage in her muffin, her pert derriere rising and falling first one side then the other. I think she does it on purpose it canāt be natural.
I found Grand Mama in the Gentlemanās Cloakroom. She turned away as I entered.
āWhat are you doing Grand Mama.ā