In the beginning was Man and Woman, and they both lived in the Garden of Eden. But what really happened was never accurately documented as thus:
It was the eight day after Creation. God summoned his two most perfect creations that morning. Adam and Eve stood before the Lord naked, looking up at him in awe.
God said to Adam and Eve, his lovely red-haired wife of pristine beauty: "You both may eat from all living thing, animal or plant, I don't give a damn. Just note this: neither of you should take a bite from that apple tree I planted in the centre of the garden."
Adam and Eve exchanged glances. Eve prodded her husband to ask the question. "Pardon us Lord, but whatever happens if we do?"
"I told you not to bother your head about it. Ain't for you to know, just abide by my words and leave well enough alone. Eve, knock some sense into your man for me, will you?"
"As you wish, my Lord," Eve answered. "We won't ask, and neither will we bother to taste from the tree you advise us not to."
Adam concurred with her.
"Very well," the Lord said before turning away from their sight. "I leave you two now to be alone with each other."
And such was how the day came to be. Adam and his wife revelled in their love for each other, and for the multitude of diverse animals that flocked all around them. The Lions came to be petted, and Adam ran his hand through the male's lush mane, whilst Eve led the Gazelles towards a stream and made way from amongst a pack of Hippo to take in water.
They stood on top of a knoll holding hands, their faces mystified in awe as they watched the giant orange-yellow ball of the sun dipped down into the edge of the earth, making way for the moon. When dusk eventually arrived they found themselves a quiet, secluded spot near a water fountain away from the pestering eyes of the other animals.
Adam came to his wife this first night but held himself in check as he watched her fall asleep. He was confused about what he should do. Earlier in the day he had watched a couple of animals perform a mating ritual near a riverside. He felt a hand for his tool, surprised to see it standing erect, but still not knowing what to make of it or even what it was meant to be done with. But as he watched the animals mate he gradually had an idea of what his tool was meant for. He approached his wife, saw her picking through some wild flowers, noticing the roundness of her backside, the fullness of her breasts ... her lips ... of the way her hips tended to sway whenever she walked ... it brought crazy, weird images flooding his mind. Images of the animals matting, but then he superimposed that of himself and his wife to take the place of the animals and he wondered how he could talk his wife into undergoing the same mating ritual with him.
He felt his hand gently over his wife's smooth, unblemished skin, and brought it forward to cup one of her breasts. Immediately the images came to his head and he felt his tool between his legs slowly kicking itself to life. But just then Eve swathed his hand away and turned to her other side. Adam disappointed got up and went and sat outside; his tool returned to its erstwhile flaccid state.
Still for the next couple of days he couldn't rid himself of the salacious images he'd had, though he didn't know how to bring it up and explain them to Eve. One day he pretended that he was going fishing and instead called up the Lord, wanting to speak with him about it.
"What is it, Adam?" the Lord asked.
Adam's face flushed with embarrassment as he searched for how to explain his predicament to his creator. "Err ... Lord, I was wondering ... ah, the other day, I saw a couple of animals doing a ... ahh ... mating, I think they were ..."
"You mean they were fucking? Come on Adam, I don't have all day."
"Yes ... yes, Lord. The animals ... they were fucking. I was wondering if ... or rather how--"
"Don't even think about it," the Lord interrupted him.
"But Lord ... you've never even heard me out--"
"I know what you're asking of me -- I'm God, remember? And the answer is no. That's N, and O, which spells NO."
"Lord, may I ask--"
"No, you may not. I'm not going to be the one who'll show you what to do with your wife. There's a reason why you're the first man ... but if you're unsatisfied, then I can always make amendments."
Adam returned home from his fishing with a worried, sad look on his face. Eve noticed the look and asked him if anything was alright; Adam replied that everything was just as fine.
And so life went on in Eden like it always did.
But that changed in one fateful day when Adam and his lovely wife one sunny afternoon decided to take a further tour of the land. They stumbled upon the centre of the garden and their eyes took in the mythical apple tree the Lord had advised them against eating from.
The tree stood enchanting and mysterious in the middle of a fallow; from its sturdy branches hung sight of bountiful red apples that gleamed as the sun's rays fell on them.
Eve was so taken by it she couldn't help herself. While Adam went about exploring the rest of the area, she approached the tree and came and stood under its shade. She didn't notice the black snake crawling along its tree branch hidden in the thickness of the tree's leaves above her head. Neither was she aware of when the snake underwent a shape-shifting change and suddenly transformed itself into the likeness of a male human being as like her Adam, except unlike her Adam, this male was the colour of midnight. His body was chiselled and perfect, and gleamed with a sweaty sheen that showcased his abs and musculature. His head was neatly shaved and his eyes, sharp brown eyes, observed the white woman with a hunger. And when this black male opened his mouth to speak, his voice sounded superior different from that of the white male -- deep and commanding.
"Do you wish to eat from the tree?" the black male said.
Eve took a hesitant step backwards, afraid that it was the Lord who had just spoken to her. Then she heard a rustling coming from up the tree branches and then followed by the sound of something heavy landing on the ground. From the other side of the tree emerged the black male. He too like them was naked; Eve gasped at the sight of his tool which stood erect before him. Except for Adam's, she'd never set eyes on another tool before ... and none so big and thick and black as this that she was seeing. The black male knew he'd got her attention and edged closer towards her.
"Who ... who are you?" Eve asked him.
"Who am I? I am the keeper and giver of secrets," the black male said. "The Lord kept me here as watch over his lovely tree. Tell me do you like what you see?"
