No Nut November - Xmas Edition

No Nut November - Christmas Edition

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Halloween was over and the next morning there was going to be a sugar high fest as we all scarfed down the excess treats that weren't handed out.

Walking into work, I bumped into one of my younger coworkers near the coffee machine, bags and bags of extra candy on display. He asked me if I was taking part in No Nut November. I thought about it for a moment, staring at all the nutty treats on display. Just looking at it made me gain five pounds. Damn, if I ate any of it, by the end of the week, I'll likely have gained TEN!

"Yeah...I am, are you?" I replied.

Laughing, he said "No!" before wandering off laughing, but only after grabbing several mini-candy bars that I enviously saw him start to consume.

Rifling through the mix of leftover treats, I couldn't find anything that I liked that didn't have nuts. Worse, a couple of packages said the contents were made on machines that nuts were processed on. Damn!

Back at my desk, I checked my snacks. As expected, they all have nuts, were made on machines that process nuts, or had oils extracted from nuts. Fuck! How do people get through a whole month and NOT eat any nuts? I understand if you have nut allergies, like by sister-in-law and her kids, but for the rest of the world?

The Halloween candy disappeared, replaced by homemade snacks. None of which I could eat. First there was the banana bread, with nuts. Next was the brownies, with nuts. Not to be left out was the peanut butter cookies! Worst of all was the homemade baklava made by my boss's grandmother. I hated not having even one, but explained to him that I couldn't eat nuts right now due to No Nut November. He looked at me with first confusion, then laughed his ass off. He wouldn't explain why.

Every day there was something, and everything had nuts. It's amazing that I made it to the weekend before Thanksgiving without giving in. Heading home, I started my vacation. On Monday, I hopped on a plane to visit my family. I left town four years ago after my divorce. Everyone still lived there, even my god-damned ex-wife and our devil-spawn kids.

The flight went well, but I had to pass on the peanuts that were being handed out. I checked into the hotel late in the evening. I called my sister and mom to let them know I'd arrived safely. Everyone was gathering at my sister's house to start all the preparations for the big feed on Thursday. I agreed to show up late in the morning. I know how crazy things get. Most families start the cooking and preparing the day before Thanksgiving, but not my family. With twenty odd people showing up, the ladies start two days before. I have to admit, everything they do must work out right, since Thanksgiving dinner is always spectacular.

Tuesday and Wednesday went fine. The guys all talked about guy stuff as we stayed away from where the ladies were working. Unfortunately, there was a BIG bowl of candied nuts calling out to me. My sister reminded me that they were my favorites, urging me multiple times to eat as many as I wanted. Damn, that temptation was almost too great, but I held strong. I'm going to make it through No Nut November!

Thanksgiving Day arrived and meals started at breakfast. I had to avoid all the sticky buns and other pastries, they all had nuts. I kept myself to the french toast, eggs, and bacon. I would have rather had the waffles, but someone, probably my mom, put pecans in them. Damn! I love her pecan waffles!

Around Noon, my brother-in-law's sister and her family showed up. By then all the nuts had been put away and hidden. No one wanted an allergic reaction on Thanksgiving. Food was great. Desert was even better. I ended up having three plates of turkey and all the trimmings. Then I had to sample the two pumpkin pies, one made by mom and one by my sister. Just to spin up my sister, I said mom's was best. After getting a dishrag thrown at me, I ate a piece of cherry pie and one of apple, both ala mode.

Just as I was getting comfortable after eating such an excellent meal, there was a knock on the front door. I didn't think anything of it. Several neighbors had come by to say hello. Turning towards the open door, I saw a sight I never wanted to see again, my harpy ex-wife. Worse, she'd brought doofus and the two evil spawn, both of whom were busy staring at their phones. The true horror was Denise, that's the wicked witch I married, had in her hands one of the most delectable and hard to get holiday treats. A fruitcake from Pierson's Bakery.

Yes, she was holding a fruitcake. But not just ANY fruitcake, but a Pierson's fruitcake. It's about 50% candied fruit, 50% nuts, 150% amazing goodness, and soaked for a month in 100 proof top shelf bourbon. It's limited edition. They only make fifty each year, selling ten each week from Thanksgiving week up to Christmas week. They go for $250 at the Bakery, the proceeds going to the local churches for Christmas dinners. How the hell did she get her hands on one?

I looked at Denise. I looked at the fruitcake, smelling the bourbon and other wonderful odors emanating from that round masterpiece. Denise looked hopeful. Clearly the fruitcake was some type of peace offering. I stayed resolute. I'd make it through No Nut November! AND FUCK HER! Trying to get back into my good graces with a Pierson's fruitcake. That was most unfair! She almost succeeded!

Quickly and politely, I said my goodbyes, whispering to my mother that I wouldn't be visiting for Christmas. I had seen the look in her eye when Denise showed up. This was fucking set up! As quickly as I could, I extricated myself from the gathering and headed back to my hotel. I turned off my phone, not wanting to get any calls or texts.

As I walked into the hotel, I checked in with the receptionist. I requested no calls be put through and no visitors, explaining that something I'd eaten disagreed with me and I'd likely be on the pot for an extended period of time. A little white lie to keep my family from hunting me down. Getting on my laptop, a quick check on the airline website, a couple of clicks, and I was now on a 5:30 AM non-stop home. I'd be checked out of the hotel before anyone woke up and back home around the time they wondered where I was.

The flight was half empty. No surprise, who wants to fly out at 5:30AM. I slept through most of it, again avoiding the peanuts.

Traffic from the airport was another matter. Black Friday craziness was on all the roads. You'd think with all the online shopping that the rushing about from store to store would be reduced and the roads wouldn't look like rush hour traffic. A 45 minute drive turned into a three hour ordeal. By the time I got home on Friday, November 29

th

, I was beat. Only one more day and I'd successfully complete No Nut November.

Once home, I turned on my phone. Voice mail was full, and I had about 300 texts from just about everyone in the family. I decided to call Alice and Alisa, my sister's eighteen year old daughters. It only took a couple of rings before they answered.

"Hello Uncle Thomas!"

"Hi girls!"

"Boy, you left at just the wrong time. But for us it was great! It was so much fun seeing the look on Denise's face as you passed up a Pierson's fruitcake and walked out the door without even acknowledging she was there! Grandma's pissed though. You said you wouldn't be here for Christmas. Don't you want to see us!"

I could see the girls were having fun.

"Best yet, was we talked Mom and Dad into letting us share your piece of fruitcake. It was really good!"

Damn, those girls were rubbing it in. I missed out on a Pierson's fruitcake.

"Anyhow, things got a bit crazy after Denise, your two robots, and dickweed left. Grandma was crying, your mom was crying, our mom was telling them 'I told you so', and all the guys were laughing their asses off. There's no way Denise will ever get you to make up with her."

"Girls, she almost succeeded. That Pierson's fruitcake was hard to pass up. But it had nuts and I'm trying to complete No Nut November."

My nieces started giggling, then laughing, then choking, before laughing some more.

"So, Alice, Alisa, what's so funny?"

"Nothing Uncle Thomas. Good luck finishing No Nut November! Gotta go!"

They were still laughing as they hung up. Not sure what was so funny. Maybe they had another piece of the fruitcake?

Not wanting to brave the local roads, I ordered a pizza and watched Monty Python movies all night. I fell asleep on my couch around the time they pulled out the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch. Waking up around 2AM, I moved into my bedroom and crashed until morning. It was Saturday, November 30. The last day of No Nut November.

Not much was in the fridge or freezer, but there were enough ingredients for a couple of cheese omelets, some sausage, and toast. Getting the sausage going in one pan, I scrambled the eggs up and poured them in another. Adding a bit of cheese to the eggs, I let the omelet set while putting a couple of slices of bread in the toaster. In nothing flat, food was done, plated, and I was ready to eat when there was a knock on the front door.

There was Zoe, daughter of my next door neighbors. She lived with them while saving up for a place of her own. She had a pair of wrapped plates with her mom's pumpkin pie. Truth be told, I had sampled that pie before, and it was much better than my mom's or my sister's. I invited her in and offered her breakfast. She wanted tea, so while I made that, I also made another omelet and toast for myself. We talked while I cooked, putting her tea on the table and encouraging her to eat while I prepared my meal.

While talking, I tried to focus on my omelet cooking in the pan. Zoe is a beautiful black woman, build like brick shithouse. I'm guessing she's around 5'10', 135lbs, and 38E-30-38. She runs just about every morning and, on days when I'm home, I can see her compression sports bra struggling to keep her contained and her hard, shapely bottom, that I'm certain I could bounce a silver dollar off of, filling out her shorts or compression leggings. Her thighs could probably break a man's neck if she cummed too hard while getting oral. We get along great, every time we meet, but there always seems to be that black/white issue that keeps us from getting too close.

With my omelet done, I sat down with Zoe, and we kept talking while I ate and we both drank tea. I forget how it came about, but she mentioned nuts and I mentioned hadn't eaten any for No Nut November.

Laughing, she asked, "Thomas, do you know what No Nut November is?"

Replying, I said, "Yeah, it's like Lent except as a prelude to Christmas." I saw her incredulous look as I continued, "In Lent you aren't supposed to eat meat on Fridays, and you are supposed to give up something you love for all of Lent. No Nut November means not eating any nuts for the month of November, since so many holiday treats have nuts in them."

Zoe had an incredulous look on her face as I finished. Taking my hand, she looked me in the eye for several seconds. Then said, "Thomas...Tom...how do I say this? Um...No Nut November means you can't cum...can't cum for any reason. Uh...have you...have you cum? You know, whacked off or had sex?"

Staring at Zoe, my mind was remembering how everyone was laughing at me for not eating nuts. Now it made sense. Fuck, it made sense. GOD DAMN IT! Then inspiration hit!

Grabbing Zoe's hand, I pulled her up, then said, "I don't want to have a No Nut November. I need your help," as I dragged her to my bedroom and stared into her eyes.

"What are you doing Tom?"

Leaning forward, I put my arms around Zoe and kissed her.

Pushing me back, she said, "TOM, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?!"

Kissing her again, then again, and again. Suddenly Zoe's arms went around me as she kissed me back. We kissed and kissed some more. Zoe started removing my clothes. I started removing hers. We continued to kiss as we got down to our underwear. My right hand unhooked her bra, and her bountiful naked breasts pressed against my chest as we continued to kiss.

Laying down on my bed, Zoe removed her panties, throwing them at me a allowing me to see her trimmed bush. I knelt down, worshiping at her sacred temple, her black legs hooked over my shoulders. Soon she was moaning, shifting about, her hands running through my hair. I could feel she was close to cumming as her feminine nectar coated my face.

Pulling me up, she said, "Inside...get your dick inside me now."

"I don't have a condom!"

"I don't care! Get that dick in me"

"You sure"

"Shut the fuck up and fuck me you bastard!"

Doing as the lady said, I slid my dick along her soaking wet slit, then popped inside like a hot knife cutting through butter. Damn, she was slick, she was tight, and she was a wildcat. Bucking me around like I was riding a horse, her legs clamped around me, keeping my dick deep inside her pussy. Her arms were around me, her finger nails scratching me. I was certain she was drawing blood.

Somehow or another, we got in sync and had our cums within moments of each other. For Zoe, my twitching cock and the load I pumped in her must have jumpstarted something in her, as I felt her cum at least two times more. I know it wasn't anything I did and was likely uniquely her.

That round of sex turned into two more, once with her riding me and one more missionary. Then we took a shower, where we fucked doggie before finally cleaning up and getting dressed. With limited food in the house, I really needed to go grocery shopping, I ordered lunch. While waiting for it, we talked about what happened. I said I was sorry I used her. Laughing, she said she used me more than I used her. By her count, she had three or four orgasms for each one I had.

Lunch arrived. We both ate, but our morning gymnastics tired us both out. Crashing on my couch, we cuddled, then fell asleep for almost three hours. Zoe woke me up by shifting around, my erect dick nestled between her butt cheeks. She pushed back against me, grinding her ass on my crotch.

I could only take so much. I got up, pulling her with me. I bent her over the couch, pulled her leggings down, then plunged my cock into her still soaking wet cunt. Zoe bucking like a bronco, urging me on

"Fuck me you bastard. Fuck me with your white cock. Damn, slam that dick into me. Fuck, keep doing that, fuck, fuck, fuck...aaaaaaaaah."

Zoe had cum, but I wasn't close, so I kept pounding her and pounding her. Her words got filthier as she urged me on. Begging me to cum inside her again. This would be my fifth cum of the day, so it took a while. Finally, I had my cum. By my count, Zoe had six more.

We cleaned up and talked, then had the rest of the leftover pizza and her mom's pumpkin pie. I asked when she was going home. She shrugged, got up, and led me back to my bedroom. Stripping off her clothes, she crawled under the covers with a clear indication in her eyes for me to join her.

This time we took things slow. We'd eaten. The lust, the passion, the reckless abandon of the morning was replaced by a languorous lovemaking. Gentle kisses, light touches, soft caresses, and all the other things slowly arouse, slowly stoke the fires with us. Pulling me on top, Zoe guided my head to her breasts, my lips and tongue teasing her nipples until they were erect. Then pulling me up, she guided one had to her breast, my fingers circling her areola before continuing their assault on her hardened nipple.

Rubbing against me, her pussy was sliding along my dick. She kept me from slipping inside as my dick stimulated her clit. I could feel her increase the pressure a little bit each time until she came, then backing off and repeating. After half a dozen cums, she started grinding against me. I was certain she was going to cum again. But instead, she shifted, guiding my dick inside her.

"Fuck me, you bastard, but no too hard. Gently."

I did as Zoe asked for as long as I could. My arms were tired. My legs were tired. I wasn't going to last much longer, so I pushed her harder. Plunging as deep as I could. Grinding against her clit every time I bottomed out. With a last force of will before my body gave out, I got one last cum. I don't think there was much left to shoot into Zoe, she had effectively drained me. But as before, my orgasm triggered another three of hers. As I collapsed onto her, she clamped her arms and legs around me as her body shook again and again.

We lay there for 15 to 20 minutes, before getting up. I was wiped out. Not sure if I could get it up again, even if I wanted to. Zoe looked tired but had a glow about her and a beautiful smile. Moving into the shower, we cleaned up, each of us washing the other.

After getting out and drying off, it was time to replace the sheets and mattress pad. We'd had way too much fun in that bed and had left the evidence of our tryst on both. With the bed remade, I expected Zoe to leave for home. Instead, she joined me under the clean sheets and cuddled with me until we fell asleep.

I was awoken by Zoe on top of me. The clock said 11:42PM.

Looking at me and grinning, she said, "We'll fuck one more time to end your No Nut November with a BANG."

For fifteen minutes she rode me, trying to pull a final cum out of me. Then she picked up the pace, teasing me and tormenting me as she urged me to cum one more time. At 11:58, I had my final cum. I expect it was just a trickle, at best. But just the fact I had cum made Zoe cum one final time too.

Sunday, December 1, I woke up alone. I'd slept like the dead and woke up much later than normal. Zoe wasn't in bed with me and when I checked the house, it was clear she was gone. After getting cleaned up, I went to the grocery store and got real food. At home, I did laundry in preparation for going to work the next day, and to wash the sheet that Zoe and I had soiled.

In the following weeks, a number of things happened and didn't happen. At work, multiple co-workers asked if I'd completed No Nut November. I just smiled and didn't say a word. That drove them nuts. On the flip side, Zoe barely acknowledged my existence. When greeting each other, everything was normal, but any time I wanted to talk to, she brushed me off.

A week before Christmas, Zoe's parents, Daren and Monique, asked me about Christmas plans. After letting them know I was staying local, they invited me over to their house for Christmas dinner. I accepted, offering to bring something. Monique shot me down. She and Zoe would take care of everything.

Shit, now I had to get presents. I'd already sent presents off to my family. Yes, even to the two blights on society that are my kids. Sorry, they really are shits because they latched onto stepdaddy without ever looking back at me. Even my family agrees with that, even though my mom wants me to somehow reconcile.

Anyhow, last minute Christmas shopping. Daren and Monique were easy, gift cards! Zoe was a bit more trouble. I finally got an idea, an evil idea. She'd been blowing me off. Well, I couldn't forget that amazing Saturday, November 30.

Christmas Day came and carried, well, wheeled, my gifts next door. Knocking, Daren met me. I handed him the gifts for Monique and him but pointed to Zoe's gift. It wouldn't fit through the front door. Opening the gate to the backyard, we were able to wrestle it through the french doors in the back of the house. Then carefully carrying it, Daren and I plunked it down next to their Christmas tree.

"So, do we open presents now, or after dinner?" asked Monique.