My father invited me into his study and bad me take a seat.
"Now then, Samuel," he began, "I want to talk to you about your future. We must do something about your career."
"Thank you, sir," I replied, very pleased to hear the news.
"Now the first thing. As you are 21 and of age, I think there is no reason for you to continue to call me sir. Father will do."
"Why thank you, sir. I mean Father. Thank you, Father. It is an honour. Please tell me what you have in mind for my career."
"Well, as you know, your older brother will inherit the estate, and is already well placed in society with the prospect of a suitable bride. It is clear your younger brother is headed for the church. Good Latin, passable Greek, not an original thought in his head. Tends to believe anything you tell him. Perfect for the job. We can probably get him to bishop with the right word here and there, but he is not wily enough to go higher."
"First let us consider marriage. Your mother is already looking out for suitable girls. The Chatterleys have two who are said to be rather pretty. They are 7 and 9, I believe, so should be just about right when you are 30 or so and have established your own income. Their mother is a very fine-looking and very proper woman, so we may hope one of them would make you an equally dutiful wife. We may get a chance to see them when they have the next grouse shoot. I understand their new gamekeeper has worked wonders for the estate. I believe he has also worked on the lady's garden, and her ladyship is well satisfied."
"Now we must consider how to get you into an income and standing which would enable you to court ladies of this quality. I have been very impressed with you, and believe you can do well if in contact with the right people. I therefore propose to introduce you to one of my clubs this afternoon."
That afternoon we left our carriage in a quiet but grand street in Kensington and went to a building where he pointed out the inscription in stone "Molière House" high above, presumably after the great French playwright.
"This is formally the Molière Club, but members refer to it as the Molly Club, Molly House, or just the Molly."
To my surprise we went to a side entrance and rang the bell.
The door was opened by an old woman in a smart maid's outfit, who ushered us in, greeting my father and saying "Good to see you again, Master Samuel."
I looked at her more carefully.
"Smithers, is that really you?"
(It was the beard which really gave the game away. Few serving women of my acquaintance have a fringe around the chin in what is called a Newgate collar.)
"Our old gardener! I used to ride you round the gardens at our country house."
"Indeed you did, sir! Beating me with a riding crop, just like Lord Fauntleroy. Happy days!"
"Of course, you carried him on your back, didn't you, after the savages attacked from the rear? Damned unsporting!"
"How good of you to remember sir. After his horse was killed, I carried him to safety. He got a medal from the Queen, for that."
I turned to my father.
"Why is Smithers dressed as a maid?"
"Well, I had decided to dismiss him as he was getting old, and was just going to turn him and his family out of their cottage, when I remembered that he had been batman to Lord Fauntleroy, and the club was in need of a maid to help dress members, so here we are."
Smithers grovelled appropriately in thanks.
"Excuse me, Father," I said in some puzzlement. "Surely a valet would be more appropriate."
"Come through to the dressing room, and I will explain," he answered.
We went into a room which was more like a ladies' salon, with dresses and even petticoats on open display. I was more than a little embarrassed. Surely we were in the wrong room!
"This is a very private gentleman's club where you may be sure there are no female staff to gossip. Much as we love the fair sex, we cannot have maids and cooks, only male staff."
"I see, so the servants have appropriate costumes. But why all the dresses?"
"That is the point. It is a rule that members and guests dress as females. It is very relaxing, and is a good place to meet important people. Of course, as ladies there is no smoking, so do not request a cigar. There is also no strong liquor, only light wines in moderation, to ensure seemly conduct."
"Now Smithers, or Marian as you should call her, will find you a suitable costume and I will introduce you. Maybe one of mine would fit, or we have several for guests."
"But I haven't worn a dress since I was seven!"
"Indeed, I remember your eighth birthday very well. You were so proud in your first breeches, and calling me sir instead of Papa! Now you are fully a man and it is time to meet some of the most influential people in society. You will have to dress the part. Of course, we can leave if you are afraid."
Put like that, what could I do but agree?
Another maid came to help my father into a corset, underwear, dress and wig, while I was dressed by Marian.
"I take it you are not accustomed to a corset, so I suggest this green damask tea gown which is part of the new Aesthetic movement," she said. "It is not so restricting, and suits a young male figure."
She put on what she called a 'sanitary woollen corset' which had pads to mimic the breasts. It was tight but manageable. She told me it had cords rather than the whalebone which my father favoured. Then the petticoat, and underdress with a little padding around the hips and buttocks plus a green velvet overdress.
With a brunette wig and charming ringlets, I had to admit that I looked rather fine in the mirror. My father, of course, was more formally and magnificently dressed in a pink and dark red satin gown with a fuller skirt. Marian put some Crème Céleste and Pearl Powder on my face to whiten it, as ladies of taste like to appear.
Marian led us into what looked like the withdrawing room of ladies in the grandest house. On sofas, chairs and the occasional chaise-longue were what at first sight appeared to be ladies of the upper classes conversing softly, attended by maidservants.
My father was greeted with genteel gestures from several of the club members, and responded in kind, moving gracefully to what I suspected was his accustomed chaise-longue. His skirt had a rather full bustle, and I wondered that he could sit down at all, but he did so with grace and ease. I later learned that the skirt was spring loaded! (Another triumph for our technological age.)
I sat down more gingerly (and I am sure less elegantly) and looked around. I was met with nods and smiles. Marian went to get us some tea and served it while my father told me more.
"You are here as my guest, but if you wish, I could nominate you for membership. It is the custom that we take female names and only use them. I am Florence, but it would be appropriate for you to call me Mama. We must have a name for you. Marian: what names are currently available?"
"Frances, Gertrude, Martha, Myrtle and Pearl, Mistress Florence."
"Hmm. Myrtle, I think. Will that suit you."
"That suits me fine, dear Mama. But I am worried. Is this moral, or even legal?"