Mister Micropenis

Lea suppressed a smirk as she skimmed through the e-mail and clicked on its Web site link, as she realized that Jack's most secret shame had been revealed to everyone on the Internet, by the most hilariously humiliating means imaginable.

Lea had been forwarded a free membership to "Mister Micropenis," a creation of a fellow ex-girlfriend of Jack's, that contained practically countless pictures and videos of Jack masturbating and having sex, most taken with a ceiling-mounted hidden camera, with such high resolution that it left no room for doubt about how small his penis really was.

Indeed, the first photos Lea saw were close-up shots of Jack's fully erect micropenis next to a ruler, taken by the ex-girlfriend while he was sleeping. It had been so long since Lea had seen Jack nude that, at first, she wondered if he was even smaller now than when they'd last had sex, until she remembered that his measurements on the ruler -- two inches long, and half an inch thick -- were the same as when she'd measured him for a condom. Even though this meant he was as short as her thumb and as skinny as her pinky, Lea knew that he was as big and as hard as he'd ever been in those images, not only because of how purple his knob and how tight his skin were, but also because his toy marble-sized testicles were so snug against his nearly nonexistent nub of a shaft.

In her e-mail, the ex-girlfriend explained that she'd started the site after she used some of Jack's own personal surveillance equipment to confirm her suspicions that he'd been cheating on her, in her own bed. Up until that point, she'd put up with a lot from him -- the fact that his penis was so small that she'd never even been able to feel it inside of her during intercourse, no matter how many Kegel exercises she put her vaginal muscles through, as well as his inability to maintain an erection for longer than 20 seconds (he'd managed to last as long as 45 seconds with Lea, which she realized meant that he'd somehow become even more sexually inadequate than before), and his refusal to engage in cunnilingus or any other form of foreplay, aside from fellatio for his benefit -- but after she watched Jack ejaculate prematurely with his other "girlfriend," and heard her mock the inadequacies of both his endurance and his endowment, with an explicit and extensive degree of detail that lasted several minutes longer than the sex itself, she knew she had to expose his intimate embarrassment to the public.

Within weeks of posting the clip on as many appropriate clubs, groups, communities, forums and message boards as she could locate online, she'd been inundated with requests for more -- straight women got a kick out of a selfish, unfaithful man being made to feel ashamed of his "manhood," gay men adored the amusing contrast between his sleek but sculpted, powerfully muscular physique and his practically prepubescent appendage, and even straight men seemed to appreciate the opportunity to reassure themselves that, compared to him, even the most poorly equipped among them was hung like a horse.

After a few more months of dating (and privately recording) him, Jack's then-girlfriend finally broke up with him, subjecting him to a shouted rant of all the reasons why she was dissatisfied with him, which ended with the words, "And you have the SMALLEST penis I've ever seen in my LIFE, and I'm ASIAN! For the rest of your LIFE, I want you to remember that your penis is so SMALL that not even an ASIAN woman can feel it!"

A few more months after that, and "Mister Micropenis" had already attracted more than a million hits, and was gaining new members every day. While the free areas of the site included most of the same picture and video content as the members-only areas, many people were still willing to pay the modestly priced one-time membership fee, since that bought them access to the true identity of "Mister Micropenis" himself, including his full name and as much other biographical information as his ex-girlfriend could recall from their relationship. Likewise, Jack's face wasn't blurred out in any of the photos or clips within the site's members-only areas, unlike the images of him that people could see for free. Lea stifled giggles as she glanced at the ex-girlfriend's list of tidbits:

"The only condoms small enough to even come close to fitting Jack's thimble-dick are 'Supa-Sukoshi,' a Japanese brand that's only available through specialty shops. 'Supa-Sukoshi' means 'Super-Tiny' in Japanese, and Supa-Sukoshis are actually only intended for Japanese boys who are just barely starting to hit puberty, since other condoms tended to slip off the penises of boys who weren't fully developed in that area yet. Jack and his pencil-pecker are in trouble, though, because the entire Supa-Sukoshi line is about to be discontinued, since market research has determined that even the smallest Japanese boys' penises have apparently become too large to fit inside the super-tiny condoms anymore."

"Because Jack's fully erect penis is so short and thin, the only way he's ever been able to masturbate is with his trademark 'tweezer grip,' by pinching his baby carrot-sized stub between his thumb and forefinger, and pulling at it like a sliver, because even his biggest hard-ons simply don't have enough surface area for him to grab hold of them with any more fingers than that. Even then, he can only use the tips of his fingers, because having a penis as small as a woman's clitoris apparently also makes it as sensitive as one. Yes, he's stuffed thick rolls of tube socks down the front of his shorts since he was a teenager to compensate for what's never been there, but he also does it to protect what little he does have down there, since it only takes the gentle friction of his underwear fabric against his cocktail wiener to cause a two-inch pup-tent to pop up from his lap, and as miniscule as it is, it's also impossible to ignore, or to explain away as anything but proof of how much he comes up short, anatomically speaking. Rub it too much more, and he'll make a very visible mess in the crotch of his pants."

"Jack is a closet racist who prefers Asian women because he assumes that we're all 'tighter,' and therefore, that we're more likely to be satisfied with a man who could lose a whip-it-out-and-measure-it contest to a box of Tic-Tacs. For similar reasons, he has never dated, slept with or stripped in front of a black woman."

As a fellow ex-girlfriend of Jack's, Lea learned that she'd automatically earned a membership to the site, as well as an invitation to share as many stories of her own about Jack as she wished, since an entire section of the members-only areas of the site was devoted to such tell-alls from his former flings. It wasn't an obligatory condition of membership, and even if she agreed to post her own accounts, she could include or omit whatever details she wished.

Some women were brief in their descriptions and used obvious pseudonyms, while others went so far as to post nude pictures and videos of themselves, presumably to show everyone else on the Internet precisely what it was that Jack could no longer have. Even as the ex-girlfriend who had started the site eagerly egged her on via e-mail, to disclose all of Jack's most humiliating, embarrassing, shame-inducing secrets -- well, what little secrets he had left, anyway - Lea sat at her home computer, and simply asked herself, "Well, what should I do, then?"