It was the second semester of Danny's freshmen year at ASU, and he'd just gotten back to his apartment after being kicked out of his girlfriend Lauren's parents' place in Scottsdale. He was in a lousy mood, and not just because driving back and forth between Mesa and Scottsdale took him almost an hour each way. Negotiating the distance between cities and trying to reconcile their school and work schedules besides made it all but impossible for the two to find any romantic time together.
On this night, he'd driven a total of an hour and a half, only to have her parents come home unexpectedly and hijack Lauren--something about "family home evening," which sounded like a magazine more than an activity. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he fleetingly envisioned a surreal snippet of conversation--"Family Circle & Saturday Evening Post, meet Family Home Evening." "Has anybody heard from Better Homes & Gardens?"
This kind of unexpected interference was getting harder and harder to take. When they'd started dating back in October, he hadn't realized just how big a problem her uptight parents were going to be. Even though she was almost nineteen, they kept her on a midnight curfew as if she was still in high school. Indignity enough to both puzzle and irritate him when he heard it, he soon learned this was one of their least draconian rules.
He was from a long line of Los Angelinos--also known as heathens--so when Lauren told him she was from a Mormon family, the only thing that came to mind was a joke he'd heard from another All-Conference football player, an intimidatingly huge linebacker from some north-state suburb, back in high school. At the time, Danny & Lauren were half-sitting, half-laying on his dorm room bed, talking and kissing by turns. They'd only been dating a week or two and didn't know much about each other, but the vibe was comfortable and he felt really relaxed around her.
If he'd been a little more on guard or actively trying to impress her, he probably wouldn't have made his total ignorance about her religion quite so obvious. But he was one of those people who tend to speak their minds, without stopping to plan how it comes out or how it will make them look. Lauren said it was his best quality, that unfiltered honesty. Most people found it irritating, so this was one of the things he really liked about her, that she accepted his bluntness for what it was rather than making it about her.
So, he remembered that joke about why Arizona State schools had such good football teams (because one Mormon family produces a full team, a cheerleading squad, and a Booster Club--all by itself) and asked the obvious question. "So, does your dad have, like, lots of wives and stuff?"
She rolled her eyes. "Gee, I never heard that one before." She raised an eyebrow in mockery before continuing, "No, genius. You'd think a big city boy like you would know a little more. I thought I'm supposed to be the bumpkin in this relationship." She poked his midsection with a slim finger, ribbing him in payback for the teasing he'd given her when he learned she'd never once left Arizona in her eighteen years. It was then that she'd told him about the doctrinal restriction against dating non-Mormons.
"My parents have started calling me a Jack Mormon." When he just looked at her quizzically, she explained. "It's what we call people who go to church and all, but don't really follow the word of the Prophet. My parents say dating you makes me a Jack Mormon, and that if I keep it up, I'll never find a good husband."
He'd halted in bewilderment and blinked twice before even attempting to respond. Find a good husband? This was the big worry, that their eighteen year old daughter would be forever tainted by his non-Mormonness--and if she didn't marry "well," her life would no longer be worth living or something? He felt like he'd somehow fallen into a time warp and was finding himself marooned in the Nineteenth Century. They couldn't be for real. What were they, Amish?
Danny knew that despite having to deal with her unnervingly retro-styled family (her mom didn't have a job! And she actually baked cookies, without even using the pre-mixed dough. Too weird.), he had a good thing going. He really just enjoyed being with Lauren, and even better, he knew she was really into him too.
Against her parents' objections, they continued to grow closer, and although he tried not to push the sex issue, she'd made the decision to lose her virginity to Danny. The politically correct part of his brain knew he shouldn't be as excited to be her first as he was, but the quieter real self felt like he'd won the lottery. She was all his! As beautiful as she was, she'd chosen him; he was both awkwardly honored and slightly smug about this fact.
