Kinkmaster Ssn 01 Ep 02 Pt 01

This is a parody of a popular UK television show. It is written as a narrative for the show. It is not that heavy on actual sex stuff. (There is, just not a lot.) But it would feature a few things that allude to it.

The show is separated into

1. Studio Part, where they discuss the performance of specific missions.

2. Filmed Part, where they do specific missions.

~~~~~ short divider is used to denote transition between different Filmed parts.

~~~~~~~~~~ long divider is used to denote transition between Studio Part and Filmed parts.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The opening sequence rolls, giving us a taste of what events there are throughout this series.

The camera then panned from a wide angle towards the host of this game show, a handsome and tall man in his late-40s, sitting in a red velvet cushioned chair. His name is Geoff Draconis. He opened his mouth and started his opening dialogue.

"Hello and welcome to Kinkmaster, a show where we asked 4 shameless people from various sex industries to take part in various fun, but provocative tasks in order to win this,"

He then points to the golden statue of a fully erected penis. "Golden manhood of mine. My name is Geoff Draconis, I own a sex club that satisfies any sort of kinky needs on a daily basis, which makes me the most authoritative person to be the Kinkmaster."

"And somehow, a virgin got mixed up in this game! I am here to pass judgement to these 5 brave souls, they are.........Axel Martinez! Carol McNaughty! Ryu Fukumi! Simon Waller! And Xenia De Shire!"

The audience clapped rather politely. These audiences are completely different from the last shows, and they don't know anything that's been going on in the last episode. The Draconis company have managed to get a completely new set of 50 or so audience in each episode, they are either industry people or clients of the Draconis' Den or Porntube, the underperforming porn website that it is being shown in.

Geoff continued, "And next to me, is someone who has once, completely sober, asked for daddy sauce when having a Full English. It's Little Ana Grace!" he said as he pointed to the blonde woman next to her. She is 5'9" so she is really not that little.

The blonde lady dressed in full suit, a blazer and trousers and all that, completed with funky socks and leather loafers. She said, "Hello Geoff!"

Geoff said back, giddily, "Hello Ana, maybe give the audience and the viewers at home a recap of the last show?"

Ana complied, she said, "At first, we thought we will do a just a sexier and harmless parody version of THAT famous game show on the national channel, we set the task with some sultry wordplay and nudities from some performers from our club. We always set the tasks so that the contestants do not necessarily have to perform any sexual act themselves. But so far in the last episode, we had one female masturbation, one bondage scene and two oral sex and a proper spit-roasting from the contestants."

Geoff supplemented, "....to you. Ana." Ana nodded with a quirky smile.

"Basically, in the last show, Axel Martinez has fucked Ana's mouth three times in various tasks."

"What can I say? The shrink said I was still in my "oral" fixation state." said Axel with a shrug.

A bit of an in-joke from last episode, but because the audiences are brand new, this joke is new to them and they have a chuckle at this.

"So what is the prize task today, Ana?" Ask Geoff.

"Yes, each episode, we ask our contestant to bring in a prize that the winner of the show will take home at the end of the show. And this week, we ask them to bring in... something that is not a sex toy but can be used as a sex toy. And the best thing that is not-a-sex-toy-but-can be-used-as-a-sex-toy as deemed by you, Geoff, will take a big five point." said Ana.

"Right, So right off the bat, I'll say anyone who brought in a courgette or an aubergine will immediately get last place. Xenia, have you brought in a courgette or an aubergine?"

Xenia is a 19 year-old girl who is a virgin, she got booked to do the show by mistake but she said she wanted to do it because of the money. Xenia is a pseudonym of course, it was the pen-name of the author for an old erotica published 20 years ago. Before the filming the audience are already prepped by this information along with a brief introduction for each contestant.

"No I have not," said Xenia. "I have brought in a Japanese school uniform."

"Here it is," said Ana, as she clicked on her generic tablet to make a photo of the said uniform appear on the big screen. It was a sailor-style schoolgirl uniform that is quite popular in Anime. It's a white sailor top and a navy blue skirt.

"I do a bit of cosplaying and I made these anime school uniforms myself. One time, someone from the social (media) asked to buy one off me. And I thought it was for them to cosplay and sold it to them without them. But then a few days afterwards, I got sent a photo of it covered in...... well, sperm."

Ana clicked another time and the photo of a slightly differently designed uniform appeared on the screen, but covered in a few splashes of white-shiny liquid.

Everyone had a slightly horrified reaction, "ew!" "argh!" Even though this is a sex positive show, unsolicited dick-pic or jizz-pic still creates an ick. A few people remained silent.

Xenia appreciated the reaction from the crowd, and continued, "Yeah, that's right, but because of that, I found out that this thing can be a sexual object for some people."

Geoff said, "Ok, I am sorry for what happened but that is a strong start. Axel, what have you bought in?"

Axel is the Latino hunk who is a well known pornstar. He said, "So at my 20th anniversary of doing porno, the Demonic Studio has given me this." He pointed to the screen as Ana made the photo appear up there It is an action-figure based on the likeliness of Axel fully naked.

Axel continued, "Obviously, it is not really made for me, but they have made a few modifications to a Hey-man figure. Painting the whole body nude and adding an erected penis and so on."

Geoff added, "I gotta say, this is pretty accurate, and it looks great. But can it be used as a sex toy though?"

Axel said, "Well, Firstly, I'm sex. And it's a toy."

"And they also made this interchangeable head for the figure that can do this."

He pointed again and Ana took the hint to change the picture. This time is a looping animation of Axel's figure extending his tongue, and his head wobble as a finger flick it slightly. And the crowd gave a knowing laugh as to what that can do.

"You know it's definitely not as good as the real thing but it will still be useful." added Axel.

"The penis part can also actually shoot artificial semen but I think we better not show it after Xenia's story." said Ana.

"Ok good." said Geoff. "What have you bought in, Ryu?" After a day, Geoff seemed to have forgotten the pronunciation, and said Re-yoo again.

"I have brought in, Gee-off, " Ryu sarcastically replied, "This mortar and pestle. You can stick the pestle in whatever hole you want and you can use the mortar to collect whatever liquid you want. If you don't like it, Gee-off, you can Fuck off."

Even though that seemed like a good enough explanation. Geoff sensed that there is more to this story and decided to push her further, "You can't just bring in anything phallic and call it a sex toy. Have you used it on anybody before, or??"

Ryu is this stern

kinbakushi

, a rope master, usually she will not bend easily at this question. But she also is a professional, and she knows this is for entertainment purposes that she has been recruited for. So she decided to tell her story.

"My sensei was also a master of herbal medicine, specifically, herbal aphrodisiac. " She slightly collected herself, and then continued, "he usually used a mortar and pestle to grind herbs for that, and sometimes, according to him, a potent ingredient of what is known as "women's scent", basically, pussy juice. And......he would basically 'harvest' it from me, using the very same mortar and pestle." She took a deep breath, and said, "That's it, you happy now?"

Geoff did not expect this to be quite personal, he thought she might have used it on her subject sometimes but didn't expect this. He also didn't expect that she has a submissive side to her. But this is probably enough for now, he thought, so he said, "Yeah, I'm happy." Before adding, "That's quite hot actually." The camera then panned back to Ryu to see her coy smile.

"And finally Simon!" Geoff said, "It was a very strong lineup of prizes so far. Did you bring anything good or did you bring a cucumber?"

Simon said, "I didn't bring a cucumber.....but I did bring a Gherkin." The camera panned to Geoff with a slightly disappointed face. Simon continues, "But it is a miniature model of the building the Gherkin." He said as he pointed to the screen. By this point, Ana is pretty efficient to just bring the slide up, and it is a miniature of the building in London, the Gherkin, it is made to look exactly like the real thing, it is made with the same colours and fully to scale. It is unclear what material it is made in though.

Simon continues, "It is 6-inch in size and made with steel and aluminium. And just look how real it is."

Geoff is impressed. "That is a pretty good prize, you know what, I actually think that there should be more building-based sex toys!"

Ana chimed in, "This is made by a company based in Newcastle that is making exactly that."

The crowd grasped all together.

Geoff said, "So you are saying, this is actually a sex toy?"

Ana said, "Yes, this is a butt plug version of the Gherkin, they also make a dildo version that is 10-inch tall, other buildings include a silicon version of the Big Ben, Eiffel Tower and the Empire State Buildings."

Simon said, "It looked too realistic! I didn't know when I bought it!"

Geoff replied, "I'm sorry Simon but I think even if that's true, deep inside you know exactly what that is for." Simon acted innocent. Whether it's true or not we don't know.

Geoff continued, "Carol, what have you brought in?"

Carol replied, "So I brought in this toy snake." A rather realistic toy snake appeared on screen and she continued. "This is definitely a toy but not a sex toy. It is meant to be a prank toy for a young boy and if you squeezed the tail, it started wiggling like that."

The snake on-screen wiggled horrifyingly. And its tongue also slipped in-and-out. It looked horrific but upon seeing it up close, it is obvious that it is actually a toy. The skin looked plastic and the wiggling and the tongue movement were quite mechanical. Some female audience could not cope with the idea of putting such a realistic snake inside themselves and seen visibly disgusted, while some others were delighted.

Carol added, "I borrowed it from my 8-year-old nephew."

This amused Geoff, he asked, "oh, and if you lost today how are you gonna repay your nephew?"

Carol said, "I don't think his parents, who are perverts and will watch this show, would want it back anyway seeing where it has been inside of. I'll get him a pokemon or something."

This elicited some light chuckles and Geoff moved on, "Right, I'm ready to give out some sweet sweet points. I think they are all very good actually, at least there is no foodstuff. But I am tempted to give them all more than 1 point but this nerd asked me to separate the points whenever I can, so.

Firstly, 1 point to Simon, doesn't fit the brief even though it is a good prize.

Secondly, I'm sorry about what happened, but because it is not technically a toy even though it did get some of these perverts off, 2 points to Xenia.

3 points to Axel, too narcissistic for me.

Carol's one is quite dangerous and I like it, it reminded me of a certain camping experience I had in my youth.

But purely based on the hotness of that story and the surprising factor about it means that Ryu Fukumi would take 5 points~!"

Ana followed, "1 to Simon, 2 to Xenia, 3 to Axel, 4 to Carol and Ryu gets 5 points!"

Geoff asked, "Right, is it the time for a proper task, Ana?"

Ana replied. "Bingo!"

She clicked the tablet and the screen started showing a video.

~~~~~~~~~~

There is the study sort of place in the house which closely resembled the study of the house in the original show that Kinkmaster parodied. There are different decorations though, many of them are sex related, some sex toys, and there is a giant portrait of Geoff in the style of cheesy 80's porn-film cover style.

There is a long desk and a swivel chair in the middle of the study, facing the camera. On top of it is a folded paper with a wax seal. The contestants are coming in the room to sit down, individually in different clips.

After exchanging the pleasantry with Ana, they all started reading from the paper, which is the task.

Axel is first, "Write down your biggest kink in a maximum of 3 words. Try to be as specific as possible.

~~~~~

Xenia continue to read it, "Make up a safeword,"

~~~~~

Simon, "Write down a secret about yourself. Could be anything."

~~~~~

Carol, "And then write down numbers 1,2,3,4,5 in any order you like. No repetition."

~~~~~

Ryu, "You should not discuss the information given here during the whole series, unless you are told by the Kinkmaster. "

We now see the top of the paper and there are a few blank spaces for them to fill in.

~~~~~

The clips keep flipping among each contestant thinking and writing. And then they all finished and passed it to Ana. Obviously, what they wrote is not to be revealed at this point.

Ana said, "Please stay here and I'll be back in 2 minutes."

Most of them said "Okay." Xenia said, "What is that about?" and Ryu was visibly annoyed.

Quite soon, Ana reentered the room and handed the contestants another task.

"Oh!" Axel opened it, a name-card sized card dropped out of the paper. Axel caught it before it hit the floor.

~~~~~

Ryu opened the task flat on the desk so that the card stayed on the paper as it opened. She picked it up and the camera zoomed closer to the card. It is a 3x3 grid with a few sentences. Some of it is covered up by scratchable material.

From a different angle, we see that on the back, the contestant's name is printed.

~~~~~

Xenia started reading the words written on the 2nd task. "This is your bingo card."

The camera panned to the card again.

Xenia continued. "For every row, column or diagonal line you completed, you will get 1 bonus show point."

~~~~~

Ryu, "You will get 2 bonus points if you completed every square on the card"

Simon continued, "You may not scratch off any part of the card throughout the series unless you are told to do so by the Kinkmaster."

~~~~~

Carol continued, "You may discuss the content of the card, but you may not reveal it to the other contestants."

~~~~~~~~~~

Back in the studio, Geoff is asking, "A bingo card, eh? Another one of your overly convoluted schemes? Would you care to explain it more?"

Ana replied, matter-of-factly, "Yes of course, it is not really that complicated, it's a simple 3 times 3 bingo card." She made the bingo-side of the card appear on the screen, and we can now see clearly what is printed on there.

Top left = Satisfy your biggest kink.

Top centre = [covered in scratchable]

Top right = Another contestant said your safeword.*

Middle left = [covered in scratchable]

Middle centre = Correctly guess 6 out of the 12 items written by your fellow contestants.

Middle right = [covered in scratchable]

Bottom left = Reveal your secret non-verbally.

Bottom centre = [covered in scratchable]

Bottom right = [covered in scratchable]

*If you said your safeword yourself, this grid would be voided.

Ana said, "So for the Top left, which is the kink one. The contestants will attempt to do it discreetly throughout the remainder of the tasks, including the live tasks. However, if this particular kink or sex act was done in the show by other contestants or performers, we would count that as well. "

She paused, then continued to explain, "For the safeword one, they can either rely on luck, or they can try to hint or trick the other contestants into saying that word, without saying that themselves."

She paused once more, then continued, and this time she slowed down so that the contestants and audience can fully understand, "For the secret one, we have verified that it does not overlap with the kink and the safeword for each individual, it could be a very deep secret like they have murdered someone or it could just be that they have failed their GCSE or something trivial. And the contestants could use something on their person to show it. Or it could be something they have placed in the taskmaster house or this set. They have already told us individually how they are going to reveal it and we have approved it. So there is only one specific but substantial clue that they are going to tell us about their secret."

"For the guessing one in the middle, it would be the penultimate task of the series. We will reveal how many of the grids that each contestant has completed. And based on that, they will have a chance to guess what their fellow contestants wrote."

The audience, a bit confused, started talking among themselves.

Geoff said, "That is very complicated, I think some of the audience did not understand fully and that is quite ok. I read the explanation written down and I still have to have it explained to me twice before I fully understand."

Axel asked, "And what about the other ones that are not revealed?"

Ana replies, "So those have to do with the order of numbers that you have written down. And those are more or less by luck. But we will not reveal them right now, they will be revealed as we proceed in the series."

Geoff said, "Jesus Christ, I thought we were making a sex show and you have to come up with all these convoluted games. Are we done with this, Ana?"

"Not quite...... we thought it might be quite hard for them to guess everything each other wrote at the end, so here it is a freebie for 4 of them." She said, as she started playing a clip.

~~~~~~~~~~

The clip is of Axel when he was writing down his answer for those questions.

Axel said, "Biggest kink huh?" He said, with a smile.

Ana asked, "What is your biggest kink, Axel?"

He smiled again, and hesitated, but decided to say it. "Well, it is not something I got to do a lot these days but I absolutely loved it when I was young. I used to love to pop the cherry for virgins back when I was in the early stage of my career. Oh, it was the most sensual and most intimate and treasurable feeling that one could have, because it happens only once.

We don't have any virgins in the crew, do we?"

~~~~~~~~~~

The audience in the studio started making a lot of speculative noise and the camera was flipping between Axel and Xenia, with the latter looking at him in a surprised expression, but not without a smile. Axel is looking at her smiling as well.

Ana said, "So truth to be told, we had not told all the contestants who else would be in the competition, and we didn't know at this point that we would have a virgin in our cast."

Ana said, "And as soon as we knew, and we confirmed that Axel is putting THAT down, we have done an examination on Xenia, and we can confirm that......"

Two Victorian-clothed men come out from behind the drape, playing a fanfare on their horns.

"Her hymen was intact!"

The crowd cheered in response, followed by some laughter.

"So that is her vaginal virginity confirmed, as Xenia was the only virgin in our whole cast and crew, we would do an examination to know immediately whether she had been "deflowered" or not. Or maybe her flower is already popped and that could have already been filmed, we will have to see!" She said giving a knowing nod to Geoff and the camera flip between Axel and Xenia who is now just staying coy and not giving anything away.