knitting
project is wrapped around those porky pointers of yours Rachel."
Caught flat-footed by Danielle's discovery of the now sizable ball of string in her hands, Rachel Miras thought for sure that the jig was up. Not only would Danielle see what she had been up to but Rachel would no doubt have hell to pay for the transgression. But Mrs. Parnell was far too concerned about restoring order to the ensuing chaos - and in so doing reasserting one more time her dominance over both the men in the room who she knew would soon be brought to heel as well as the two soccer moms who thought they had gotten the best of her - to pay any heed to from where the string in Rachels' hands may have come. Pushing past the shorter Mrs. Miras, and now with fire in her eyes, Danielle practically stormed up to the podium from which Dr. Eric Bloom continued unsuccessfully to call for order.
"Well that sure was close," a shell-shocked but laughing Emily Duncan joked with Rachel Miras.
"You can say that again," responded Rachel as she continued to pull on the thread of the departing diva's dress. "I thought for sure she would notice."
And then, as they watched the imperious Mrs. Parnell practically push Dr. Bloom from his place in front of the podium in her first step to "wrap the men and boys of Gonzaga around her finely formed fingers," Rachel Miras and Emily Duncan decided it was time to give the preening uber-MILF even more attention than she expected. Spying the electric panel behind them on stage that controlled each of the podium microphone, the net holding hundreds of purple and white balloons, the giant fan meant to disburse them and the smoke machine that was meant to shroud the introduction of the football team's star players, Emily Duncan was the first to speak.
"How about we throw a bit of a monkey wrench into Little Miss Perfect's plans of domination," she smiled walking toward the switch for the microphone Danielle was now tapping.
"I'm right behind you Em," came Rachel's eager response as she carefully placed the large ball of thread - the other end of which was still attached to Danielle's now slightly shortened skirt - atop the nacelle at the center of the as yet idle fan.
In the meantime, putting her well moisturized hand over the podium's microphone to mute from the frolicking crowd her words of contempt for Eric Bloom, Danielle proceeded to chide him for his inability to assert any control whatsoever over his students.
"Out of my way, Bloom," she barked not realizing that Emily Duncan had adjusted the sensitivity of the microphone to pick up every word despite the placement of the domineering diva's hand, "your weakness sickens me and your inability to quiet this band of hormone charged delinquents is pathetic. Now let me show you how it's done."
Only after her tirade had ended did Danielle realize that the auditorium had gone silent and it took yet another beat for her to comprehend that her excoriation of Dr. Bloom - which she thought had occurred in private - had just been heard by everyone. A weaker-willed woman would have blushed and slinked off the stage - but not Danielle Marie Parnell. What did she care what these sniveling teens and their peasant parents thought of her. In fact - she didn't care one lick. What's more - rather than shy away from the vacuum like silence she had created - she decided to lean in.
"That's right
boys
," she began disdainfully, "your feckless leader here is a pathetic nothing - an embarrassment in fact. And the lot of you are no better. Behaving like animals when order is called for; drooling over this half-dressed band of
floozies
writhing in front of you as if they were in heat."
"And in front of a U.S. Supreme Court Justice no less - it's shameful," the brunette barrister continued taking a moment to flash a perfect smile at Brett Kavanaugh who had been eyeing the sexy solicitor since she walked up on stage. "Well, this all stops now do you hear me . . ."
But before those last words left her lips no one in fact could hear her because Emily Duncan - now more than ever wanting to take this preening prima donna down a peg - had turned Danielle's microphone completely off much to the raging barrister's surprise and chagrin. Aping what Eric Bloom had done only minutes before, the usually unflappable Mrs. Parnell began tapping on the head of the mic - her face now showing as much frustration as fury - trying to restore its function. In the meantime, a chorus of teenage of laughter began softly to spread through the crowd.
"What is it you were saying," came a snide call from a boy in the bleachers that permitted that chorus to quickly reach its full-throated voice.
"Who was that," yelled Danielle now truly beginning to lose composure. "How dare you people laugh at me!!"
But laughing they were, and cheering, and beginning again to sing the strains of "On Gonzaga!
"Stop it this instant," the furious femme fatale shouted as she tried in vain to regain control over the situation, "do you know who I am?"
Meanwhile, having ambled back to the control panel offstage, Rachel Miras offered an answer to Danielle's question to a guffawing Emily Duncan.
"I think it's time we showed them
exactly
who she is," she joked while simultaneously pulling the levers that released the balloons, turned on the fan and began pumping smoke onto the stage.
"What is the meaning of this," Danielle raged as large balloons of purple and white - powered by the force of the fan as it purred to life - began pelting her, Brett Kavanaugh and the other dignitaries on stage.
And then, seeing Emily Duncan and Rachel Miras pointing and laughing at her from offstage, the livid lawyer turned her ire squarely on them.
"You two nothings are finished at this school," she shouted, "
finished
."
At this point the crowd's excitement was in overdrive. The pep band was playing, cheerleaders dancing, football players shouting and the senior student body cheering for them all while also laughing at the ordinarily domineering mother of Will Parnell who seemed to be figuratively coming apart at the seams. What no one had yet realized due to the smoke, balloons, wind, and other distractions now afoot before them, was that Danielle Marie Parnell's very fashionable, very fitted and very sexy Alexander MacQueen skirt was also literally coming apart at the seams.
That delicious discovery was first made by those boys seated on the stage who, through the smoke and as Danielle continued railing against the mothers Duncan and Miras, noticed that Mrs. Parnell's once nearly ankle length skirt now seemed to end above a few inches above her knee.
"Holy crap Parnell," intoned a suddenly smiling Calum Duncan to Danielle's oldest child who still had not noticed his mother's predicament, "that thread from your mom's skirt is caught in the fan."
Already embarrassed by the antics of his always bossy mother, Will's apprehension rose ten-fold as he glanced at his her quickly unravelling skirt which now - still unbeknownst to her but increasingly obvious to those nearest to the stage - had risen to the middle of her tan and muscular thighs.
"Mom," gasped will Parnell as he struggled between every son's instinct to protect his mother and his own wish - just this once - to see his always arrogant and showy mom finally end being the one who looks foolish.
But before Danielle could turn to face her son who - as usual she thought - was interrupting her at a most inopportune time, Rachel Miras decided to bring Mrs. Parnell, who was continuing to yell at her and Emily, up to speed on the state of her wardrobe.
"I just
love
your skirt Danielle," she offered gesturing at what now appeared to be a very tight miniskirt ending immediately below the curve of Mrs. Parnell's perfectly formed ass.
"Are you
serious
Miras," the supercilious vixen practically spat. "Is that pea brain of yours so dysfunctional to think that some saccharine flattery about my skirt . . . "
But before she could utter another word, while looking down to see the fashionable, sexy skirt of which she spoke, Danielle Marie Parnell realized the true nature of her predicament.
"Oh my God my skirt," she screamed just as Emily Duncan again turned on the microphone in front of her which had the effect of her next exclamation again silencing the crowd which finally turned its attention to the antics on stage before it, "what's happening to my skirt!?!"
And as the entire crowd began to go wild at the sight before them, with women and men each high-fiving one another for completely different reasons, Danielle Parnell's day began to go from very bad to much worse! What happened next would be the talk of Gonzaga High School for years to come.
