There was a pervasive feeling of elation among the mission crew. Consisting of myself Program Commander Major Tom, and Mission Coordinator and Pilot 1st Mate Prom Queen.
It was a clear spring day perfect weather for a successful launch.
With a 100% success rate since the introduction of the B.J.W.A.V. (Blow Job with Anal Vibration) Expectations were high every mission was better than the previous mission.
I was relaxed and confident.
The B.J.W.A.V. missions had added a much needed boost to The Program (code name for our sex life.)
The Program had become a dull mind numbing process with zero excitement. There was nothing nada, zilch, zero a horizon of emptiness. Watching paint dry was more. stimulating than the program. The Program looked dead in the water, just waiting to be torpedoed. After only a 5 year run the program seemed to have run it's course.
The B.J.W.A.V. had changed all that. There was a renewed excitement about the program. The missions were greatly anticipated instead of dreaded. Since inception of B.J.W.A.V. the number of missions, and protein production had more than tripled to the delight of the crew.
The B.J.W.A.V. launch was all systems go, and went off without a hitch.
The B.J.W.A.V. was the brain child of 1st Mate Prom Queen. Her oral abilities were unmatched. She had years of experience in piloting similar craft like the Good Vibrations. (A chromed anal class probe with variable speed capabilities. It is vessel used to produce, and deliver vibration, and penetration with pinpoint accuracy.)
The B.J.W.A.V. consisted of 2 separate stages.
Stage 1: To orally stimulate the P.O.S.(Protein Output Shaft)
Stage 2: Anal stimulation with the Good Vibrations.
Both stages should be executed simultaneously to achieve optimum results.
Prom Queen's execution and performance were exemplary. Her pin point BZZZ BZZZ of the Good Vibrations. And coupled with her wet warm oral suction on the P.O.S. with a piston like quality was magnificent.
She was exceeding all my expectations. The level of arousal of the P.O.S. was visually noticeable, and exceedingly larger than prior missions.
At this point my heart was pounding. My breathing was erratic. The P.O.S. was at maximum rigidity, and was swelling in preparation of ejaculation of protein. It was my time to shine. My focus on the P.O.S. protein release was intense. It was so close expulsion was eminent, all indications it was another successful B.J.W.A.V. mission.
We were fast approaching the summit of success. I began yelling YEAH BABY YES YES!!
When stage 1 of the mission without warning was immediately halted.
I looked down and said "What the hell baby don't stop." Staring up at me with fear in her big blue eyes. She said "WE LOST IT".
I was thinking if you mean the mood hell yeah.
She then showed me her hands. This took a second to register in my mind. Stage 2 was still engaged BZZZ BZZZ BZZZ and unmanned.
Remain calm I thought to myself. You're the Commander. You're trained not to panic in emergency situations. I immediately spun around bent over, and screamed GET IT OUT!!
Prom Queen was already in kitchen looking for retrieval option #1. A set of metal salad tongs.
The whole time I felt the Good Vibrations BZZZ BZZZing deeper into the abyss of my anus.
My mind was ablaze with the horrible carnage this probe could cause to the program, my body, reputation ego and my name would be the butt of butt jokes.
Prom Queen returned with the tongs in hand. She did a quick assessment of all the variables. Her high school biology knowledge on the human digestive system. The Red Cross First Aid Course she took at the Y. After a short deliberation. she was insufficient in knowledge, and training for her to spearhead the Good Vibrations Retrieval Operation.
In times like these a man will give pause to abstract thinking.
The word PROBE is generally associated by me with two groups.
NASA or ALIENS
1) ALIENS have an excellent probe recovery team. We know this because of all the abductees. Not one abductee has ever been found to have a probe still in them.
Aliens must have really long fingers.
Where's an alien when you need one?
2) NASA probes are exploratory tools usually expendable, and never recovered.
Bringing me back to the here, and now.
I heard Prom Queen sweet voice saying "We have to go to the E.R."
In wanting to avoid the panic, hysteria, and personal embarrassment. I responded I'll just take a laxative and...
Prom Queen shook her head no. She surmised. With the Good Vibrations motor in the on position. Having new batteries installed prior to launch, and it was not equipped with a remote kill switch. This is our only option. I thought thats pretty smart for a public school graduate.
My heart sank this B.J.W.A.V. mission had been scrubbed. The Programs future was in question.
Meanwhile back at Ground Zero. The Good Vibrations was Bzzz bzzz bzzzing into the Backdoor Galaxy.
