All in the Timing

All in the Timing:

Guide to Imposing Discipline

Experienced dominants know that there are three important factors to consider when determining how and when to discipline a submissive: timing, preparation, and follow-up.

Timing deals with answering the question of when to impose discipline. The choice is between immediate imposition or carefully scheduled (and delayed) punishment. Neither is always appropriate: the dominant needs to decide which approach is suggested by the circumstances of the sub's misbehavior.

Immediate imposition of discipline usually is selected when the sub has behaved badly in front of others and will thus benefit from being punished in their presence or nearby the scene of the crime. Of course, if the sub has gone so far as to challenge her domme's authority or position, most dominants would highly recommend that punishment be meted out right then and there, and with a significant degree of severity. This stern approach is mandated by the need to assure those present that the dominant is in control.

But when it appears necessary to shame the sub for his or her atrocious conduct, especially when this has occurred with others viewing the behavior, the dominant should be prepared to take matters into her hand, literally, with quick preparation and speedy imposition of punishment.

Often, the dominant will find herself taking the sub in hand literally, adjusting the sub's clothing by raising a skirt, and lowering panties or trousers, and then positioning the sub over her lap for a spanking or bending the sub over a convenient table, desk, or couch for application of the cane or strap.

Sometimes, it may be appropriate to state for those in attendance what the sub's offense was and that she is now going to be disciplined. The domme may wish to invite all of the onlookers to remain in the room to witness the punishment, which of course adds to the shaming factor.

"Susie has just misbehaved and with your indulgence, I will now give her a spanking right here so she may benefit from all of you observing her being disciplined," is one possible statement. This kind of statement also serves to notify those who, even in an audience comprised largely of those who support physical discipline, may have qualms about seeing a grown man or woman humiliated by having their clothing removed and then being spanked or caned in front of the group.

If the gathering is one that is for those both aware of and fond of discipline, then the domme may choose to make a more detailed statement of the situation. She may recite in some detail what the sub has done to earn the award of spanking or caning, and then carefully outline how the punishment will be administered. At this time, the domme may also choose to involve others present in the imposition of discipline. For many subs—both male and female—shame is intensified when their domme invites others, especially younger women, to join in spanking or caning the sub.

Sometimes the dominant may not wish to discipline before everyone present, and thus a good alternative may be to move behind a screen where those at the gathering may hear but not see the discipline being imposed. Since the mind remains the most powerful sex organ, those within hearing will be able to discern pants or panties being pulled down and then hear the spanking being given. The sub knows that this is being listened to by the others and is shamed almost to the extent that full viewing would produce.

We now may turn to the more general subject of preparation for discipline. First, the issue of scheduling a punishment should be examined. There is great benefit in postponing imposition of discipline to permit the sub to reflect on his or her offenses, and more importantly, to have their thoughts dominated by their wondering about exactly how and even when they will be punished.

Thus, the dominant may merely tell the sub that he or she has behaved badly and will be punished. She may go on to specify the time and place of disciplining: "You will report to my room tomorrow at 4:00 P.M. for your punishment." She may stop there or indicate that the sub will be spanked, caned, or strapped.

Many dominants feel that it is far better to refrain from specifying the nature of the punishment until the time for imposition arrives. Not knowing how he or she will be punished, the sub will constantly be worrying about how serious the discipline will be. If the domme says that he or she will be spanked or caned, the sub will then start thinking about how many strokes will be given or how long the spanking will last. And the sub may not be sure whether the punishment will be given in private or whether others will be invited to witness the event.

Preparation next should focus on the domme's deciding what pre-punishments or humiliations may add to the overall impact of the discipline. Some dommes require male subs to wear women's panties for the day preceding the actual spanking or caning; female subs may be told to wear very tight panties or perhaps little girls' panties adorned with ducks or bunnies. The major aim of this preparatory step is to increase the sub's feeling that the punishment will be a major happening.

Usually dominants expect that subs reporting for punishment will be dressed at least formally enough for work. Women will be expected to wear dresses and hose; men should appear in a suit or at least jacket and tie. I always get a charge out of having a male sub pull down his trousers so I can see the pink panties I've order him to wear all day before reporting to me for his punishment.

Another part of preparation is examining the sub's clothing and person when they arrive. Extra punishment follows if clothing is sloppy in any way. With women, I find that close scrutiny of the cleanliness of their panties tends to weaken their resolve—it becomes truly embarrassing when I question them about the source of stains.

Men, too, get embarrassed, first because they are wearing panties in the first place. But if I comment on cum stains or skid marks, they tend to turn very red in the face.

If I find stains in a woman sub's panties, I then tell her that she will be fully examined. I may insert a white cloth anally and then show it to her if it emerges with fecal stains. If there are cum stains, she may be subjected to a full pelvic exam. And if she is having her period, she will remove her tampon and show it to me.

When a caning has been decreed, I learned from some famous mistresses I have met to give the sub at least a day to think about how many strokes they may be getting. I do make them count, do not tell them how many they will be given (partly because I decide on that as the punishment proceeds), but warn them that I will start from one if they lose count.

I agree with the experts who advise to cane, strap, or spank on the fleshy parts of the bottom, not too high and not too much on the thighs. I may use a light whip or martinet lightly between a woman sub's legs but I avoid penis punishment as I wouldn't want to inflict injury. Yes, pussies are liable to be injured, too, but can withstand light strokes. For most women, just the idea of being disciplined "down there" inspires intense distress.

Follow-up is the third major aspect of any disciplinary imposition. One practice frequently chosen is corner time. This, of course, may occur before the punishment as well as after, but the impact of having the sub stand or kneel in the corner after being spanked or caned is heightened by their red bottom being on full display. Corner time is effective both in driving home the punishment by forcing the sub to think about what she or he did to earn the discipline they received and in increasing their shame by displaying their punished parts to all who may be present or pass by.

One refinement requires the sub to keep his or her nose touching the corner. Usually the skirt is pinned up and panties are lowered or removed. With men, trousers and shorts are kept lowered. Some dominants choose to extend the punishment by making the punished sub kneel in the corner—this may be made more severe by placing uncooked rice grains or dried peas on the floor beneath their knees.

Another follow-up measure is to make the sub wear embarrassing clothing for the rest of the day or longer following the disciplinary imposition. With women, this might feature their donning a very short skirt that will expose their panties. Clearly, this is a very embarrassing extra punishment—it may be increased by making the sub go without any underwear. Men may be made to wear all kinds of embarrassing clothing as well: it may be difficult to have them wear women's clothing in public when it is obvious that the wearer is male, but a frilly blouse will instill some shame. Even when items such as bras and panties are worn under a suit or other male attire, the wearer will be afraid of others recognizing that the feminine underclothing is being worn and will feel some shame in wearing it.

Another area for refining the nature of the punishment experience is regulation of bathroom access. Being told he or she will be disciplined often makes both men and women need to urinate. Some dominants prefer to allow use of the toilet prior to any imposition to avoid creating a mess. Others feel that making the sub retain prior to and during the punishment adds to the impact of the entire process. Since subs will naturally assume that they will be permitted to use the toilet once the punishment has been completed, restricting access after disciplining extends the punishment. This is intensified if corner time is employed while a sub is struggling to control his or her bladder.