What Is Reality?

So what is the difference between fantasy and reality?

I recently did a scene with Louise, and found myself being talked into writing it up. And what I wrote was pure fantasy:

--*===*--

"Please Master, may I be flogged?"

She knelt on her cushion with her head bowed and her eyes lowered; demanding nothing, offering all. As normal, she wore no clothes, but her face was partly shrouded by her wild free hair. She spoke no further, yet the need in her was clear to see in the statue-like immobility with which she held her pose.

Slowly I stood up, and moved behind her. Remaining silent I stroked her neck, then gently pushed her down into the cushion, letting her exposed behind be my answer. As I set her favorite song to playing, she snuggled down into the fabric, laying at full extension with her legs spread, so as to expose her ass and back to the caress of my leather.

No more words needed to be said. The night before we had discussed her growing pleasure at receiving pain, and now was the right time for her to take the next step - to admit and ask for it of her own free will.

I ran the strands of the flogger down her body in long slow sweeps, waiting as the tension drain out of the muscles and her body visibly relaxed. Gradually I built up speed, putting no power behind each stroke, but making it leave and come into contact with the skin. Once the skin had started to flush, I began to vary the strokes, putting a little bite into strokes that matched the beat of the music, varying the angle to warm up the main areas I intended to target, but keeping the rest of the body in contact with the flogging. As the song changed phase, I went back to running the strands up and down the arms and legs, ending each massaging run at the center of her ass, giving the warm up time to work.

The song ended and, giving her a smile, I put it on auto repeat then got to work. *thud* *thud* *thud* *thud*. I started alternating strokes between her cheeks, getting two strokes into each beat. Her legs twitched in time, then relaxed into it as two rosy spots started to glow. Keeping one eye on her face to monitor her headspace, I gave free rein to my desires. *thud* *thud* *THUD* *thud* ........ *THUD* *thuThuTHUD* varying the power, the target, the speed, the contact duration, now using the tips, now using full contact; now landing with a square thud on the ass, now just a brief stinging contact near the genitals, ever trying to steer her closer to her personal edge ... to extend her comfort zone. Trying a level and getting twitching, doing a few harder swats to distract her then returning to the previously uncomfortable level, only to be rewarded with a blissed out grin.

When I judged the time right, I slowly wound it down, until I was just gently running the strands in long strokes down her body again. Keeping that going with one hand, I lay beside her and finally letting the flogger stop moving I dropped it and we embraced.

I tell you, her grin ... it was THIS wide. :-)

--*===*--

Why is the above fantasy?

Because it leaves out all the identifying details that make Louise, Louise and me, me. What was reality?

Louise had been sitting at the computer earlier, chatting over IRC, when I came down. I plonked myself on the large green cushion that Louise uses to eat her meals off which we term the subbie couch.

Douglas: relaxes comfortably.

Louise: Hi Master

Douglas: {pause} {fx: puts on puzzled tone} there is something wrong here

Louise: {thinks} ... {thinks} ... {falls out of chair laughing}

Douglas: hastily grabs HIS chair

Louise: seats herself imperiously on her subbie couch

Louise: Master, hand me my book! [Well, ok, I'm trying to give you reality here, and as Louise forcibly reminds me, what she actually said was: Master, could you pass me my book.]

Douglas: makes a faint swat at Louise's ass which, alas, was out of reach, before passing her yet another one of her Star Trek novelisations.

Louise: In that case, Master, could you pass me the flogger?

Douglas: {growls} Yes, ok

Douglas: {mock bows} Your wish is my command.

Douglas: putters about a bit, dragging tables into corners to clear enough room to use the flogger freely.

Douglas: Better take your skirt off

and your top. Lie face down. No, down the room.

Douglas runs the flogger over Louise a few times.

Douglas stops, goes over to the computer and puts on "Summer Rain" by Belinda Carlisle, then goes back to dragging even more furniture around. There is now a fair size oval cleared, five paces by three, surrounded by piled up books, more books, videos, even more books, katanas, a few books more, chairs, the book the bad and the ugly. [Ok, Louise says I'm exaggerating about the books]

Douglas is actually able to start flogging, 5-10 minutes after the scene head space started. He does the warm up, then realizes that he isn't going to be able to do the Impressive Two Handed Strokes (TM) while he is using one hand to hold his smoking jacket [*grins while doing writeup* I KNEW L was going to object to that on the grounds that I don't smoke tobacco. However it sounds better than dressing gown, and this is MY writeup so a fantastic chinese dragon inlaid smoking jacket it is] closed because the belt has long since been used as a gag or miscellaneous bondage cord. [L corrects me again, apparently it was in the washing machine. Right, THAT DOES IT! I'm going to get the flogger and let Louise type what she was actually thinking when I mysteriously left the room.]

[[[ Louise writes:

After Master left the room, I lay there for what was actually probably only about five minutes but seemed longer. I knew that the flogger was on the table at the back of the room, and was trying to work out exactly what he'd gone to fetch. I had thoughts of the spiked wheel he enjoys using on me so much, then I noticed that it was in fact on the floor a few feet in front of me. So I thought it was possibly his cane, then tried to put that thought out of my mind. The fact that he'd gone to replace his dressing gown with a jumper was certainly not amongst my thoughts.

I raised my head and looked round at the room. Then I flicked my hair away from my face and placed my head back down on the cushion's edge, placed my arms bent at the elbow, wrists crossed beneath my forehead and listened to the music and emptied my head and tried to relax. Taking long slow breaths I waited for Master's return. ]]]

[Douglas reluctantly stops flogging Louise, and continues the write up.] Well, the actual technical details of the fantasy were pretty accurate, but they left out that I think Louise looks pretty lovely with thin red impressions left by the flogger tails accentuating the curves, adding texture and complimenting the light and shadow patterns on her gorgeously rounded behind and pert nipples. (well, ok, I couldn't see them at this time since she was on her front, but since I torture them regularly, I can remember what they look like pretty well). At one point she was grooving along to the music, the flogger sending her ass back and forth to the beat and she was grinding her hips with the lyrics "dancing with you in the summer rain". I was really pleased with managing to get the back beat right, my whole body swinging in harmony with my arm and the flogger, the tails lascivious extensions of my will. However I did add some wicked THUDs when I thought she was enjoying the song a little too much (like more than me) :-).

Then there was also the point where I changed my position to get a better view of her face. I really like the way her eyes go when she smiles. Whoops, should have paid more attention to the flogging - the tails got caught in the chandelier.

Douglas laughs.

Louise {poor tormented victim, right?} absolutely cracks up

Douglas goes back to flogging with a vengeance.

Remember me saying "When I judged the time right"? That's code for my arm about to drop off. I'll let Louise describe how she was feeling at the end of the scene. However, after the scene, she did do the "poor injured worn out put-upon dom" look and try to hand feed me the chinese meal I'd cooked and which had been totally forgotten and left to get cold while we played. Too tired to torment a sub just that little bit more? Don't believe it!

[[[ Louise writes:

Up till the time that Master hit the chandelier, I had been hovering on the edge , this is hard to describe. Sometimes when I'm in a scene I really let myself go and, well, it's almost like I'm no longer inside my body at all, I can just enjoy the sensations without really feeling pain at all. Anyway, I had held myself back from that state during the early part of the scene to try and get more used to the normal impact of the whip. After we finished laughing however, it took me a couple of minutes to get back to that state and I just let myself go completely. I can't judge time at all for the rest of the scene, and I am just floating until Master stopped hitting me and I slowly returned to full awareness. All I could do was look round at Master with just feelings of contentment and love for him. Nothing else mattered at all. One thing that the fantasy certainly had absolutely right was my grin.]]]