i always thought that my foray into submission and kink would be all about sex and sexual feelings. i'm learning just how wrong i am. My family as well call me the ice queen because they know how uncomfortable i am with showing emotion - especially crying. Yet crying is what i feel was about to happen to me. Thank goodness for Your strong, steady and controlling voice and words calming me down.
i need something in my pussy so badly something nice and big and all yet all you are allowing me to do is hump the air. my body and mind are all concentrated into my clit and all i can think about is Your gaze touching my open cunt and it gets too much for me. i can't hold my piss in. Your telling me that i can't come unless You say so contributes to this one physical release. i just let go and feel the warm piss running down my legs and through my arse crack and soaking my bedding and mattress. It just won't stop. It flows and flows. Oh wow now i've just exposed myself totally to You and i'm laying in a warm pool of my own urine.
You give me a moment to savor the feeling and tell me how much You enjoyed watching me not being able to hold on. You tell me because i have been so good i can rub myself in the piss sheets. My breathing speeds up as i know how generous this is of you because You know from our earlier conversations how that really excites me. It's amazing to feel the warmth and a type of comfort from the wetness. i face away from the camera, so You see my back and arse. i spread my legs and hump away at the bed all the while getting myself more thoroughly soaked in my own juice and mess. It's amazing! i really need to touch my clit but You won't let me. i'm desperate. i really though enjoy having that choice taken away from me because left to my own devices i would have cum in two seconds flat! i have to beg for orgasm i want to shout it out loudly.
i start off with 'Please Sir let your whore cum'. You are not impressed and ask me why You should let me cum. I try again 'Please Sir let your whore cum for YOUR pleasure'. You tell me that's better but not nearly desperate enough. i'm almost sobbing now with the need for release. my body is drenched in my own urine, my wide open cunt is dripping juice and my mind is so turned on that i can hardly think straight. i try once more 'PLEASE Sir PLEASE let Your whore cum for Your pleasure'. You can hear the helplessness in my voice and finally give me permission, but tell me to do so immediately.
i don't know if i'll be able to do so on command so to speak, but to my shock and delight i do! The combination of the pee, my humping, the current running through my mind and Your amazing voice and what You are saying, makes me think that i am not quite as quiet with my orgasm as i should have been. my groan seems disturbs the late night silence as my orgasm makes my entire body tingle. my cunt greedily seems to demand more stimulation and i grind myself harder into the wet sheets. my clit connects with the now cooling and starting to smell piss and i cum again. This is too much for me and i start to see white spots. i lay there panting. Dishevelled and smelly i'm open to Your gaze with my spread legs and dripping cunt. i have never felt this happy in my life.
i will probably have to explain the noise tomorrow to the others in the house, or at the very least field strange looks from them. i don't care though. What You have granted me tonight is worth the slight annoyance my housemates might feel towards me.
TWO HOURS LATER ...
All of the above led to me feeling energised refreshed and above all appreciated. i can honestly say that my one thought tonite was to not disappoint You but at one point, as i said before, all my energy and focus was on my whole body and what i was feeling. Also i feel as if i'm getting clearer on what it is i actually want and need. i've always thought that i was too strong willed and selfish to make a good submissive never mind slave! i still think so but i think that my desire to please and give myself at certain times will eclipse those other traits.
One thing that really is really being impressed upon me is just how powerfully i'm influenced by my mind. I was really mind fucked tonight and it was as good as actually having a cock in me. Wow its 2:22am exactly! Not sure how i'm going to get it right but guess i should get some sleep!