I'm older, married and living a largely vanilla life these days, but I often daydream about my past as a submissive.
I'm 5'5", maybe 130 lbs, C cup with nipples that require real pain to activate and big curly red hair.I spent most of my late teens and all of my twenties as a submissive and enjoyed every moment.
I knew as early as high school that I was a sub. Interestingly I'm a strong willed, driven woman, but even then, my pussy would quickly react to anything that put me in a sexually submissive position.
A hand woven through my hair at the back of my head was the easy button to fucking me. That move would cause things to just happen inside my body that turned me into subby mush.
A nipple bite had similar effects and a bare handed spanking would have me on my knees with a hard dick in my mouth before you could count to ten.
I'm not broken, I didn't have any childhood trauma, I'm just wired to be tied up and fucked. In fact to this day I have to pretend my hands are cuffed to properly cum.
Even at a pretty young age it didn't take much for a partner to pick up on my needs and take me to fun places. One particular guy used to dream up a new way to tie me up and fuck me every few weeks and he's who stars in most of these memories.
It probably began with asking a BF to use a belt on my ass. It made me cum like crazy, but the marks and pain sitting for the next week made it less fun. Shortly after I hooked up with a friends with benefits kind of deal and soon had access to the pain/pleasure I needed whenever I needed it.
We began with simple handcuffs and once he realized what bondage did to me, he soon escalated our sessions to real BDSM. I'm pretty sure he was just as excited to be able to live out the fantasies that had filled his brain as I was and we left very few stones unturned.
Hands cuffed behind my back while I blew him soon became hands cuffed behind my back, bent over the back of the couch having my guts rearranged and learning the more helpless I was the harder I came.
Not long after I found myself standing in the middle of a room, wearing nothing but platform stilettos and stockings with my hands bound by padded leather cuffs and strung up above my head. This was also when I discovered nipple clamps.
I'd already encouraged biting and pinching my nubs and explained my desire for rough treatment as having poor nerve endings. Maybe true, maybe I'm just a masochist.
Now helpless with my hand far above my head and tits pushed out I could only watch intently as he applied the alligator clamps. The pain was excruciating and exquisite at the same time. My eyes closed and head leaned back as I hung helpless to do anything but let the pain radiate through my body and shoot lightning bolts into my clit. Words fail me as what this did to my body. I was nearly panting and could feel my pussy getting wetter.
A simple vibrator pushed me over the edge as I bucked and thrashed much to the delight of my owner. He soon let me down and with my hands now behind my back fucked my face while my clamped nipples slammed against his legs. I knew I'd struggle to wear a bra for the next week and I didn't care. The nipple pain and a hard dick in my mouth had once again thrown me into a mind bending orgasm. My groan/scream pushed him over the edge and with handful of my hair he came down my throat. We were both satiated and had unlocked another level of bdsm that we would often repeat.
The next time I would be tied with my hands over my head I'd still be wearing panties and within them would be a butterfly vibe that seemed to make my brain melt. IT did not penetrate me, but rather was held against my clit by my panties and emitted a rather torturous level of vibration that was enough to keep me teetering on the edge, but normally not enough to make me cum. Add in clamped nipples and a riding crop now bouncing off my ass I came easily a half dozen times before begging him to stop. It took me a half an hour laying under the covers on the couch to catch my breath before I could continue.
A few sessions later I was tied hands over my head facing a wall. My ankles now sported cuffs and a spreader bar and my nipples were again crushed by clamps, adding a whole new level of pain as they slammed into the wall. He fucked me from behind and with one hand on my hip and the other holding a vibrator against my clit. I thrashed through countless orgasms and the hand on my hip was soon over my mouth in a likely attempt to keep the neighbors from calling the police.
My legs were soon giving out and I was now begging him to cum in my mouth in an attempt to avoid losing consciousness. He was good at reading me and I was pretty quickly resting in an overstuffed chair with a cold water as the tingles in my body slowly subsided.
"I made something special, are you ready to try it?" He asked as I snuggled and nursed the blood flow back to my tortured nips.
Built something sounded a bit ominous, but also pretty cool that he put time into something for me.
"Stand up and spread your legs a little." He commanded.
I was on my toes before he finished the sentence and he wrapped a thin belt around my waist, pulled an attachment between my legs and then I felt the vibrator slide into my pussy and knew where this was going. It was sort of a leather g-string that firmly held a vibrator in my pussy and I later found out, locked around my waist.
What I didn't expect was having my hands cuffed behind my back and to the belt. This effectively pushed the vibrator into me and put pressure against my clit every time I moved my now helpless hands.
He clearly had not forgotten my earlier pleading to blow him and with a handful of the hair on the back of my head, he lowered me to my knees. If the vibe had been turned on I would probably have cum.
Hand still in my hair, he turned my head to the left to show me what looked like a remote control. Before I could work out what it meant he pushed a button and my pussy came to life. I moaned like such a slut.
Never letting go of my hair he fucked my face while the vibrator danced inside me. I came before he did, but his orgasm was crazy intense and he groaned through a half dozen salvos of cum that shot directly down my throat.
This was the first time he called me a good girl and the words shot right to my wet pussy.
The next toy he made was even more diabolical. It consisted of nipple clamps connected by a chain with a small leather pad wrapped around the middle of the length of chain. From that hung what appeared to be large fishing weights.
"Ok baby, here's how this will play out. I'm going to cuff your hands over your head, put a remote control vibe in your little pussy and use our favorite crop on your ass."
Well, that sounded delightful and I was getting wetter by the minute as he pushed the vibe into me. What I did not see coming was the leather piece attached to the nipple clamps being inserted into my mouth.
"Bite down a little, you probably don't want to let this fall out of your mouth as these weights may rip your nipples off in their descent."
My eyes went wide as I realized I could not get through a beating and handful of orgasms without screaming and that would for sure let the leather drop resulting in a massive yank on my already tender nipples.
I moaned as the vibrator came to life and my entire body shook. I bit down and tried not to scream as the crop slammed into my ass twenty plus times. pathetic groans and grunts emanated from my mouth as the vibrations grew and my body betrayed my mind.
The first orgasm was manageable and I held the bit in my mouth, but by three I was losing the battle. Completely helpless, a vibrator at full throttle, my nipples on fire and blows reigning down on my exposed ass were conspiring against my will power.
The next few blows came down on the inside of my thighs and the pain/pleasure were too much. I threw my head back which introduced a whole new level of torture to my nipples and induced a guttural scream that naturally resulted in the weights dropping and third level of pain shooting back and forth between my clit and nipples. The orgasm seemed to go on forever and I don't even remember him untying me. Everything ached in a wonderful way and I soon lost consciousness. We used that toy quite a number of times in different scenarios. I think he liked it both because it was diabolical and because it kept me somewhat quiet.
Nipple torture became a staple and not long after that mind altering session I was dressed in slutty heels and a leather collar with my hands cuffed behind my back and nipples clamped and strung up to a hook in the ceiling. I could only imagine how sexy that would have looked, every muscle in my body tensed and my nipples lifted up by the clamps. Any rocking on my heels tugged violently on my now very distended titties. It was evil and amazing and was making me so wet.
He came up behind me clearly naked and pushed his very hard dick into my hands. He whispered into my ear "Think you can make me cum without torturing your nipples too badly?"
This was crazy hot and I stroked his oiled up cock the best I could moaning each time my movement introduced pain into nipples. He reached around cupping my tits and momentarily taking the pressure off my twisted buds, only to drop them and elicit a guttural scream and shooting waves of electricity hitting my lonely clit.
"I think I'll play with your boobs until I cum." He whispered into my ear. I knew the implication, make him cum as quickly as possible or the torture would escalate. The depravity of it all pushed me closer to orgasm. I knew he liked dirty talk and went into a narrative that would have made a sailor blush.
"That's it baby, cum all over my ass, paint me with your cum, make me take it like a little slut, or maybe you'd prefer to put me on my knees and fuck my face? You want to hear me gag as you use my throat?" I groveled as my oiled up hands furiously stroked his cock.