The Rules for Self-Spaning

I like to be spanked. Really, I do. Please don't judge me.

Spanking is both physical and psychological. I usually like the physical feeling although sometimes I don't like it as much when the sexual arousal goes away and I feel the after effect of the spanking without that distraction.

From a psychological viewpoint, I love the feeling of giving up control of my body to the other person. I think what I like about that is an overwhelming feeling of trust in that person. If you let a guy do things like tie you to the bed and spank you, you better trust him.

Of course, I prefer to be spanked by another person but sometimes, I really want to be spanked and there is no one to do it. So, sometimes, I'll spank myself. I said don't judge me. With a self-spanking, I can get the physical feel but the problem is that I know that I'm really still in control.

I can't fix that completely but I've found a way where I can give up control, if not to another person than to chance. I use dice to determine what, where, and how much I'll be spanked. Then I just need the self-discipline to follow through no matter what. I've developed a game with a set of rules that I commit to.

First, I decide on how long my spanking will last. Sometimes, I just want a quick spanking to be followed by a session with my vibe. Other times, I want a slow and sensual spanking. Of course, to be followed by a session with my vibe.

In the first stage of my game, I'll do a round of spanking for each piece of clothing I'm wearing. I'll take off one piece after each round. When I run out of clothes, I'll do the same number of rounds completely naked.

I use three dice. The first is for what I'll be spanked with so I lay out six implements before I start. I've collected a nice set of toys. Some are soft and some are hard. Some stingy and some thuddy. I like the variety.

The second die decides where on my body I'll be spanked. My butt will get most of the spanks but I like some on my boobs, my thighs, and my pubic mound above the vulva. I'm not crazy, so spanking those areas is limited to my metal ruler. It stings but doesn't do any damage. Under my rules, all spanks go to my butt until I've removed any clothing covering the that part of my body. When my pants come off, my thighs can be spanked, etc.

The final die is for the number of spanks--before I start, I roll one die to pick a multiplier. If the multiplier is three for example and I roll a four, I'll get twelve spanks. It means that I'm potentially going to get between 1 and 36 spanks at any single time. And yes, spanking yourself 36 times takes a lot of self-discipline!

Finally, to spice things up, I have some extras for the rounds after I'm totally naked. If I get three of a kind, I'll edge for a given time 1-1-1 is eleven seconds, 2-2-2 is twenty-two seconds, etc. Edging for sixty-six seconds when I've been playing for a while also takes some self-control to stop.

1-2-3 means that I'll put clothes pins on my nips through the next round. 2-3-4 means I do it for two rounds. 3-4-5, for three rounds and 4-5-6 for the rest of the game.

Plus, I have to re-roll the dice for that round's spanking.

It's not as complicated as it sounds. I'll describe last Saturday's game to give you an idea of how it works. Currently, I'm dating a couple guys but I'm not sleeping with either of them yet and I suspect than neither of them are going to be into spanking. I had been thinking all week about how if I want a spanking, I'm going to have to do it myself.

I met a couple of friends for brunch. They were going to a movie afterwards and invited me to join them. I told them I couldn't go since I was going to spank myself. No, of course I didn't. I just said that I had other plans.

That left me with a totally free afternoon and I wanted a slow, sensual spanking with lots of rounds. To make it last for a while, I put on eight pieces of clothing: t-shirt, bra, jeans, panties, socks, shoes. I brought out my bag of toys and selected six: the metal ruler, a wooden ruler, an old leather belt, my hairbrush, a wooden kitchen spoon, and my hand. I also laid out some clothes pins. I checked my vibrator to make sure it was charged.

To start, I roll a die to get the multiplier for the number of times I'd be spanked. I got a four which meant that each round, I'd get between four and twenty-four spanks.

Here we go--round 1 is 3-2-4. That means spanking my butt 16 times with the wooden ruler. I bend over the end of the couch, lean back and begin my spanking. Honestly, it feels more symbolic than real since I'm using a low impact toy over both my panties and jeans. Toward the end, I can sort of feel it but I'm ready to move on. I take off my left shoe and roll again.

Round 2: 5-3-4. This would be 16 spanks on my boobs with the hairbrush. Two problems though--no spanking the boobs until my top and bra are off and no spanking there at all except with the metal ruler. If I was topless, I'd just trade the brush for the ruler but now I trade the boobs for the butt. Again, I lean over the couch. This time, the heavier hairbrush can be felt through the two layers. I start to feel like I'm really being spanked although I know I'll feel it a lot more in the later rounds. I kick off my right shoe and sit down to roll the die. At this point in the game, I can still sit down without feeling it.

Rounds 3-6. I had lost my shoes and socks but that didn't change much since the spanks were still on my butt over my clothes. The cumulative spanks were adding up so I felt them but I wasn't particularly sore. I was, however, getting increasingly horny and was starting to feel a physiological indication of my arousal (yeah, I meant that I was getting wet).

I had lost my t-shirt in the prior round and now I had to make a decision between losing my bra or my jeans. If I was playing strip poker, I'd probably keep my bra since that would keep me more covered. Now, if I took off my bra, under the rules of the game, my boobs could be spanked. If I took off my jeans, then spanks on my butt were going to start to really hurt. I've thought about changing the rules to set an order for removing clothes so I wouldn't be in control of that but I haven't done that yet so I need to decide. I want to extend this spanking as long as I can and since most spanks were still going to my butt, I decide I'll keep my jeans on. I reach behind to unhook my bra, pull it off, and toss it on the pile of clothes next to the couch.

I roll the dice and immediately question my decision. 6-3-6. Even though I wouldn't be using the wooden spoon it called for, I'd be spanking my boobs with the metal ruler 24 times. Did I mention that the metal rule stings? Yeah, it does. I like the sting but 24 times is going to turn them light red.

The good news is that I've got two boobs and I'll do half on each one. I've thought about making my nipples a separate category but it isn't now. My b-cup breasts don't give a lot of room to spread out the spanks but I won't have to hit the same place over and over.

For the first time, instead of bending over the couch, I sit on it and lean back. Here is one of the problems with self-spanking. I'm letting the dice pick a lot of things but I am still in control of how hard I hit myself. It takes some self-discipline to do it hard like I wish someone else would if they were spanking me. Not so hard as to do some damage but enough that it's a real spanking.

I take the ruler in my right hand and let go at the top of my left boob. Ouch. The inside. Ouch, The outside. Ouch. The underboob. Ouch. I draw back and aim at my nipple. Ouch. Ouch. Ouch. I switch hands repeat this on my left boob.

I'm not even half-way through and I can see them turning pink. I do another five on the right and then on the left. More ouch. I have four more spanks left and can do it anywhere on my boobs so, of course, I do two more on each nipple as hard as I can. Major ouch.

I'm now feeling obvious arousal. Spanking does that to me and that's how it is. I'm absolutely wet and feel a heaviness in my midsection. I sit and breathe in for a bit and then slip off my jeans.

The next roll of the dice directs the spanking on my inner thighs. Since I'm down to my panties, my thighs are exposed so they're fair game. Again, I use the metal ruler. The rules don't specify where on each thigh and I like to begin mid-thigh, working my way up. I do the last spankings as close as I can get without hitting my pussy. My thighs are the same pink as my boobs were and seeing the marks that were left by the edge of the ruler near my panties ups my level of excitement. I lift my hips and slide my panties off. I'm now naked so I take a quick bathroom break and then move onto the next stage of the game.

And of course, the first roll is 1-2-3. I attach the clothes pins to my nipples (ouch) and re-roll the dice. The good news is that it's only 12 but the bad news is that it's my boobs. I have to think about this for a bit. Do I want to spank my boobs with the clothes pins on them? Do I spank my nipples that way? This hasn't come up before in my game and I don't have a judge to ask for a ruling. I decide that I'm going to do what the roll of the dice calls for. Here goes.

Spanks to the top, bottom, and sides of each breast don't hurt any more than they would without the clothes pin but each spank jiggles the boob and my nipples moves painfully under the pins. Yeah, ouch.

I've got two spanks left on each boob. Normally, after spanking around it, I'd go for the nipple but I'm thinking that spanking on top of the clothes pin is going to really hurt worse than a normal nipple shot. I hesitate, thinking that the rules only say the boob and I don't have to finish by spanking my nips. If someone was spanking me and was in control, what would he do here? Damn, damn, damn. Yes, that hurt. But the round is done so I take off the clothes pins and massage my boobs as the blood flow returns.

BDSM play is supposed to be safe, sane, and consensual and this applies to self-play too (no comment about the sane part please). I decide that my boobs have had enough for the day so if they come up again, I'll switch to my butt. I feel guilty so I decide that I'll double the spanks if that happens.

Which it does. The next roll of the dice again picks the boobs--four spanks with the wooden spoon. That now means eight on my butt with the spoon. I'm careful with the spoon since I gave myself a pretty good bruise with it once. I want to see where I'm hitting and make sure that I don't aim twice at the same spot. I lay down on the couch, roll onto my back, and pull my legs up to my chest to administer the spanks. I do half on each side and move the target around. Yeah, it still hurts but the pulsing that is starting to build in my pelvis balances the pain.

I get one round with the leather belt. It's pretty heavy but I've done long sessions with it without the bruising I can get with the hairbrush or wooden spoon. The problem is controlling it so I double it up, holding onto the belt buckle to make sure it doesn't get swung at me with the leather part. Bending over the end of the couch, I wish that I had someone else to use it on me fully extended and think about how it might feel on my boobs and the back of my legs. My arousal level at this point is getting high and I look longingly at the vibrator that is sitting there waiting for me.

The final round at last and the dice read 4-6-4. Sixteen spanks on my pubic mound. It's an interesting area to spank. With the ruler, I don't hit my vulva or labia directly (and absolutely not my clitoris). I wonder what the belt or even the spoon might feel like though. It's a thought for another day. I lean back on the couch and pull my legs up again and lift the ruler up. Since it's the final round, I try to hit as hard as I can take but I admit that I eased up at the end.

My body feels sore but alive. My boobs--particularly my nipples--are sore and I suspect that I'm going to feel this afternoon's activity in my butt sitting down tomorrow.

What I'm feeling mostly now is the need for an orgasm. My vagina is incredibly lubricated so the egg-style vibe slides in easily. I reach for my phone and start the control app. I close my eyes and lean back to await my ecstasy.