The Healer Ch 06

3 Aug

Mike

"Is there a problem officer? My wife and I..."

"Sir, could I see your license and registration please?"

"Yes, of course."

I retrieved both and handed them to him, although my hands were shaking and I could feel residual cum soaking through the front on my pants. He directed us to remain in place while he went back to his patrol car, and a few minutes later he was back and handed me my license and registration.

"Sir, were you aware that your plates have expired?"

"Oh shit! I've been away on extended business and it just slipped past. I'm sorry. I'll take care of it right away."

"Well it's just a few days past the grace period but I still have to issue a citation. There are no points and the fine is like twenty-five bucks as long as you send in proof of renewal. If you'll just sign here we can have you on your way."

I dutifully signed the citation and he tore off my copy and handed it to me.

"Here you go sir. And a little advice?"

"Yes officer?"

"You and the missus might want to move things to a hotel room. We do have laws about that sort of thing you know."

"Yes sir, we will. Thank you!"

He winked after his last statement as he climbed into his car. I know that Deb and I both blushed but we giggled like teenagers as we got back into the car, which was still heavy with the scent of sex.

"Do you think he saw us Mike? How long do you think he was standing there?"

"No clue as to how long he was there but he had to have seen. I don't know about you but it kinda' turns me on a little."

Deb was pensive for a moment but then spoke quietly.

"My inner voice says that I should be mortified, but there's a part of me that is excited too. Does that make me a slut or an exhibitionist? Is it wrong to think that way?"

"I don't think it's wrong babe. Maybe this is the sort of thing that James is going to help us with. All I know is that what just happened between us was really good."

Deb nodded and put her hand on my thigh as I pulled the car out into traffic. At that moment I had hope that things were going to get better from here on out.

12 Aug

Deb

One of the things that James had told us was that part of the process required development of what he called a 'pseudo-intimate' relationship. He further elaborated that it meant dating and behaving like a couple so that the counselor could see where the problems were and also the true desires of the client. Additionally it was all to be very open and Mike and I were supposed to recount all the details of the sessions to each other. We had discussed this for a few hours after James had told us and we were in agreement that we should do it, but also stop if it got too hard for either of us. We were both very much aware that this would mean having sex with other people, and who knew what else.

I waited anxiously in the family room for James to arrive to take me on our first outing. In all honesty I couldn't deal with calling it a date so I settled on the term outing. He had instructed me to wait for him to come to the door and that Mike needed to be home and see me off. We were both quiet as we waited, mostly because it all seemed so bizarre and against all societal norms. Mike finally broke the silence by first clearing his throat.

"Deb, I know this whole thing is weird but I really believe it will help us and be good for us. I know that you love me and I know that you know that I love you. You know that don't you?"

I chuckled at Mike's little joke which really helped break the tension.

"Yes I love you and know that you know that I know that I love you. Did I get that right?"

We both laughed and hugged closely. This small interaction relieved much of my anxiety and made me feel even closer to Mike. I also hoped that it was an indicator of what was to come with our relationship. We both jumped when the doorbell rang. Mike stepped quickly to open the door, which seemed strange to me on some deep level. As expected James was standing on the front landing.

"Hello Mike. Good to see you again."

"You too James, please come in."

"Thanks Mike."

We all sat and made idle small talk, which again was just one of those weird nuances of polite society. After a few minutes James mentioned that we needed to go since there were dinner reservations and stood up to leave. Then he turned to Mike and shook his hand.

"Mike I just want you to know that I'll treat her well and no matter what I'll always keep in mind the fact that she's your wife."

"Thanks James. This is all so very surreal but Deb and I are committed to this process."

"That sort of attitude will be a big bonus for the both of you on this journey and will help you immensely. I'll have her home by eleven which will give the two of you plenty of time to talk."

The two shook hands again and I had this strange feeling wash over me, like I was a piece of property being loaned out. On the other hand it seemed like I was a teenage girl and my date was telling my dad when he'd have me home. All-in-all it was just plain bizarre. But there was also something very arousing and exciting about the whole thing. We walked to the car and James surprised me by opening the door for me. My first instinct was to get my feminist dander up that I was totally capable of opening my own car door. For sure no man had ever opened a car door for me so it was a new experience. Truth be told I sort of liked it. I guess it made me feel special. The procedure was repeated when we parked and also upon entering the restaurant. I decided that I could get used to this sort of attention and my body was in total agreement.

One thing that I noticed about James on the drive over was that he's very well put together. Some people might use the word impeccable but to me that implies someone who is a perfectionist and that's not what comes across about him. He is just well-ordered and everything is done well with some good forethought. His suit was tailored but didn't appear to be overtly expensive. His nails were manicured but didn't look to be professionally done. The car was a BMW (sorry I don't know which model) but it wasn't brand new either, at least according to the odometer anyway. It was well cared for and was clean with a fresh scent, which showed me he didn't eat fast-food in the car. His watch was a quality brand but not a Rolex, which I knew a lot about because of the research I did for the one I bought Mike. Ugh! The thought of that clouded my thoughts for a moment but I had decided in previous days that I wasn't going to dwell on that since our relationship was more important than a watch. All-in-all James was just well put together without being pretentious, and admittedly he was an exceptionally attractive man.

The restaurant was an upscale establishment but not so much that you felt out of place, which again fit with the whole package of what made up James. And feel free to think dirty thoughts about my choice of words in choosing 'package' and 'James'. Truth be told I had thought about it more than once or twice myself based on what he said about his role in the program. He remained true to form when he pulled my chair out for me but thankfully did not order for me, although he did select the wine after we made our dinner choices. The place was also laid out in such a way that you felt like you could have private conversations. We made small talk until the first course arrived.

"So Deb, how would you describe yourself sexually?"

"I uh, beg your pardon?"

"Sexually are you outgoing and open or on the other end of the scale?"

His blatant and direct question threw me off so I tried to deflect.

"Didn't all those surveys that I completed tell you already?"

"Surveys are good for what they are good for, but I find that it's most helpful when people just talk. So how would you describe yourself?"

"Well open I guess."

"Tell me why you would characterize yourself that way."

"I guess because Mike and I have tried bunches of things to spice up our intimate life."

"Such as?"

"Oh, the stuff normal people do. Lingerie, role play, toys. Things like that."

"Normal people Deb? Do you think that people who are into pain, latex, or bondage are exhibiting aberrant human behavior?"

"I don't know James. I don't want to sound judgmental but it isn't what normal people do. Is it?"

James looked deeply into my eyes and shot me that warm and disarming smile.

"After you've worked with as many people as I have you find out that normal for human beings has a much broader definition than what we initially think. Much of what we define as normal is based on our own personal upbringing and life experiences. It is also shaped by certain perceived cultural norms which do serve a valuable purpose in society since children would certainly be confused or frightened by public display of some fetishes. In any case, discussing the whole topic makes you uncomfortable doesn't it?"

"Yes. Yes I guess it sorta' does. No wait, Jen told me I needed to be totally open and honest in this process so I'm going to change that. It really makes me uncomfortable to talk about it."

Again the killer smile came out but this time he reached across the table to touch my hand.

"And there's your first giant step Deb! It's the very crux of what we need to work on and the admission is the first step."

A little laugh escaped my lips.

"You make it sound like an alcoholism step program!"

"I've never thought of it in those terms but any behavioral modification requires the admission that there is a need to change. So in that respect you are right. My role in all of this is to help you reach your desired outcome and you'll find that you will become more comfortable the more you talk about the things that make you uncomfortable. Even though my syntax is horrible, does that make sense?"

"Yes of course it does. Just like what they do to help people get over phobias."

"That's right Deb. Now, tell me about how and when you lost your virginity."

"Excuse me? Oh, sorry. Please be patient with me. I'll come around. This is just new to me and not the easiest thing to do."

James looked at me with soft compassionate eyes which put me somewhat more at ease and so I proceeded to unload all the boring and sordid details, albeit somewhat uncomfortably.

"So how do you feel now that you've shared that with me?"

"I don't know. Maybe a little embarrassed. It was all very clumsy and not at all satisfying. But I guess I also feel a little liberated?"

"Let me assure you that it's clumsy and not satisfying for virtually everyone. And that feeling of liberation is good. It's what we are looking for. Now tell me what you enjoy during sex."

"Um, you mean like what position?"

"Sure, you can tell me that, but I also want to know what elements of sex you enjoy."

"Mostly we just do Missionary. And I guess I like the closeness."

"Are you multi-orgasmic?"

"Not that I know of. I don't even orgasm every time I have sex with Mike. Please don't tell him though."

"I won't, but you will need to one day. Once Mike understands that then he can help you climax other ways or maybe be content with you not having an orgasm. Western culture places too much importance on the orgasm and not enough on all the other elements of sexual intercourse. It's certainly an area that we will need to explore."

My face flushed with embarrassment but there was something more. I was tingling, like a low electrical current was flowing over my whole body. And yes, I was getting wet. Part of me hoped that we would have some sort of intimacy and another part felt guilty, like it was a betrayal of Mike. In reality James was running the show and I was just along for the ride, which I was hoping would be the operative word. What was happening to me? I would never have had thoughts like that before and here I was making dirty jokes. I found myself enjoying the idea of being a naughty girl and the thought just served to make me a little wetter. James looked at me intently, like he was reading my thoughts. That's why what he said next startled me so much.

"You're thinking about sex right now aren't you? With me in fact."

The certainty with which he said that last part would have made me buckle at the knees had I been standing.

"Uh, no. Why would you say that?"

"Deb."

The look he gave me said he knew I was lying.

"James, this isn't right. I'm not that kind of girl. Decent girls don't think that way."

"Are you saying decent girls don't think about sex? We both know that's not true don't we?"

There was a part of me that wanted to jump up and run out of the restaurant. And yet I didn't. A larger part kept me glued to my seat and I found that intriguing, if not just a little unsettling.

"Well I guess they do sometimes but it's just not polite society. You just don't go around blurting out things that you like about sex."

"Of course we don't do that. But that societal convention shouldn't extend into the sexual dynamic of two people in a committed relationship because it causes a breakdown in communication. That very openness of feelings, likes and dislikes is vitally critical to emotional health. Do you see what I'm saying?"

"Yes I completely get it. It's just easier said than done."

"Yes Deb, you are correct in that. But most worthwhile endeavors are easier said than done. I will say that it's obvious to me that you want to do this and as I've mentioned before that's a big step. So shall we continue?"

This time there was only a moment of hesitation before I nodded assent, which also caused a favorable reaction with James.

"So do you like oral sex Deb?"

"Giving or getting?"

"Both."

"I guess neither really."

"Why do you think that is?"

Nobody had ever asked me that question and in reality I had never given it much thought. James was patient while I pondered my response.

"The men who've done it to me just didn't know what they were doing and it either did nothing for me or it just plain hurt. As for doing it to guys, I know they like it so that's why I do it, but I don't care much for it myself."

"Do you swallow?"

Wow! These questions were getting really personal and tough.

"No, I normally spit it out."

"What about when a guy comes on you somewhere?"

"That normally doesn't happen, but when it does I wipe it off with a towel or tissues. Based on your questions it sounds like I'm doing the wrong things."

James gave me that compassionate and disarming look, and yet he seemed so genuine. Perhaps that was his real talent. He seemed to really care so being with him didn't feel like being with a therapist and that was making it easier to open up.

"Let's not use the word 'wrong' and instead go with something like 'optimal'. There are certain elements of the male psyche that probably have their roots in the animal kingdom. Most men view their semen as something that defines their maleness and masculinity. Not only are they insecure regarding penis size they are also concerned about the quantity of ejaculate and how far it shoots during ejaculation."

"That's kinda' dumb James. Who cares how much and how far as long as it is enough to fertilize an egg? Besides, it's just that much more mess to clean up."

"Sex isn't supposed to be logical Deb. Regardless of whether or not it makes sense it's the reality of being a male in our species. Women who understand these differences are much better equipped to make the men in their live happier."

"But this is supposed to be about what makes me happy isn't it?"

"Of course it is. But what you are going to discover is that by making Mike happy you are going to make yourself happy as well. By changing your focus to the other person rather than yourself, you will find that your whole outlook changes and you will reap great contentment. I know that sounds really mystical or Zen but it is so very true and well-proven."

"I guess I can see how that makes sense."

"Anyway, back to the discussion at hand. Men also share another characteristic with the animal kingdom which is territory marking but fortunately for all of us we don't do it with urine."

"Are you saying that Mike shooting semen on my breasts is marking his territory? I'm not anybodies territory or property!"

"No you aren't Deb, but the more you study mating behaviors in the animal kingdom the more you'll see the similarities. I'll send you some reading assignments later that I think you'll find very enlightening. Just take my word for it that Mike probably has no idea why he does it and for sure he doesn't view you as property. He does view you as his mate and in human genes that means a whole range of basic behaviors."

"I'm just confused James. Other men will never see the semen marking me."

"That's true Deb, but animals don't see the marking urine, they smell it."

He could see the obvious look of bewilderment on my face so he continued.

"As I mentioned it's all very deeply imbedded in the genes and the animal part of us knows about smells and pheromones, which aren't easily washed away. The truth of the matter is that other males may be able to sense that you've been marked, and for sure in Mike's inner self he feels better that you've been marked. I should also mention that you should make an effort to not wipe the semen off."

"If guys can sense it regardless then what does it matter?"

"Look at it this way, how would you feel if you kissed Mike on the cheek and it left a lipstick mark and he quickly reached up to wipe it away?"

"I'd be hurt. It would be like he was ashamed of me and didn't want any evidence of me on him."

James just sat and looked at me intently while the impact of my own words sank in.

"Oh. I think I see. If I rub it in it's like I'm saying that I'm proud he's my mate and I want his 'maleness' all over me so that the other males know I'm taken?"

"Yes, in a nutshell that's it. And in return you will find that it excites him which means better sex for you. In some cases the excitement will be high enough that there is an almost immediate second session, which benefits you since most women need more lead-in time and foreplay."

"So I take it that swallowing is the same as him not wiping away the lipstick right?"

"Now you're getting it. And the smart male will wait for the female to wipe away the lipstick."

The light bulb over my head was getting a little brighter and I was excited in having learned so much in just a few minutes. Feelings of eagerness to learn more began to infuse me. Of course the wine was infusing me as well. We finished dessert chatting about less serious topics, but James had me mostly talking about myself which was having the effect of making me feel very warm and relaxed.

After dinner we walked in a nearby park for a short while and then made our way to his car, which he again opened the door for me and helped me in. We continued to talk as we drove and I just assumed we were headed back to my house until we pulled into the parking lot of an apartment building. My first instinct was to object until I realized what Mike and I had signed up for. He again helped me out of the car but we really didn't talk as we rode the elevator up. I don't think I could've said much anyway since I was so nervous. He unlocked the door and it was barely closed behind us when he grabbed a handful of my hair and roughly pulled me through the apartment and into the bedroom. At the edge of the bed James wrapped his other hand tightly around my throat, pulled my head back and pulled my mouth to his. I had to stand on tip-toe to reach and almost immediately he thrust his tongue into my mouth. My core melted and effused its way through my whole body and my knees went rubbery. His strength was amazing since he was now basically holding me off the floor by my head and neck. He threw me back on the bed and in all truthfulness I was powerless to object, and I doubt I would have in any case. Within moments I was floating above myself and looking down as events unfolded.