I didn't know how best to describe my desires as I grew older, at least I never truly acknowledged them from fear of judgment until I met Him.
January. Two weeks ago.
I was rushing to class when I first saw Him. He was chatting with a good friend of mine, dressed in a black shirt and blue jeans. He was undeniably gorgeous with bright green eyes and black hair, cut short on the sides and longer on the top. Stubble covered his square jaw, and with only a glance in my direction, I was hooked.
I stumbled, spilling the contents of my bag on the concrete. Putting out his cigarette with his boot, he came over to help.
"Oh thank you," I told him even as I tried to not meet his eyes. I was terribly shy around new people.
"Nonsense. It's no trouble at all."
His voice sent shivers down my spine, the low cadence just hinted at an accent I couldn't immediately place. I had my books back in my bag in seconds.
"Thanks for your help. I really have to get to class."
"But--"
I quickly walk away, my cheeks burning. I've always hated getting embarrassed. My building came into view, the familiar bright blue calming me. I entered the auditorium where at least seventy other students sat, all scattered in the rows.
"Hey Ashley, why'd you run back there?" Denise, my best friend, came to sit beside me, pushing her blonde hair back from her face.
"I didn't run," I deny pulling out a notebook and pen. "I just didn't want to be late?
She rolled her eyes at me. "Don't forget, I was there. Adrian thought he'd done something to offend you."
Adrian. So that was his name. It fit him well. "How do you know him?"
"He's a grad student in my father's class. He came over to dinner once. Totally weird, but he's extremely sexy, right?"
I shrugged as the professor dimmed the lights.
"Admit it, you think he's hot."
I ignored her for the rest of class, focusing on the bland lecture my professor was giving on Health. After our hour was up, I stuffed my books in my bag and stood, ready to get back to my apartment.
"Oh, I almost forgot. He told me to give you this."
Denise passed me a a card with a design of an ink pot and a pen covering the front, on the back was a scrawled number.
"He said you'll need this."
"That's very pretentious." I pocketed the card anyway, a bit surprised that he would be interested in me, even a little. "See ya."
I left and got back to my room after a ten minute walk. I dumped my bag on the floor, plopping down on my bed to open my laptop. I sent a few emails to professors and family before reaching in my bag for my journal. After a futile attempt, I emptied the contents, my heart beating wildly as I realized it wasn't inside. I must have dropped it when I ran into Adrian. Which would mean he has it. No wonder he thought I needed his number, because I did.
All of my most intimate thoughts were in that journal. Every secret desire written in explicit detail. If he read any of it...
Pulling his card out my pocket, I dialed his number on my cell and waited as it rang. He picked up on the third ring.
"Hello?"
"Adrian?"
"Yes, who's this?"
"Hi, this is Ashley. You may not remember me, but I ran into you earlier," I said trying to stay calm though my face was hot.
"Ah, how are you? I wasn't expecting your call so soon." His tone was playful and I had a sinking feeling that he might have read some of it.
"Good, good. I was calling because I think I might have dropped my journal when I hit you. Did you see it?" I wanted him to say no and hopefully I could just go back and search for it. At least that way I could pretend nobody read it.
"I do have it."
My heart stopped. "Oh, can you drop it off or give it to Denise if it's not too much trouble?"
"How about you come by my apartment tonight around seven?"
"I don't know--"
"Here's my address." He began rattling off his address and I quickly grabbed a pen to write it all down.
"I'll see you then Ashley," he said before hanging up without a goodbye.
Either he was very confident or really busy. I glanced at my clock. Only 4 o' clock. I went to take a shower, taking the time to wash and condition my hair.That wasted a good half hour. After dressing, I tied my hair up and began my homework, hardly concentrating on the questions, but at least it took up my time.
Why would he invite me over to his place and I hardly knew the guy? He couldn't be that bad if he'd had dinner with Denise and her father. Denise's father was a very tough professor and he rarely spent any social time with any of his students. So did that make Adrian good or bad?
I decided to dial Denise. "Hey, what do you know about Adrian?"
"Not much. Really cool. He's a writer I think. My dad said he's a really good student and is trying to get an internship at a publishing house. Why do you ask?"
