I stopped staring at my plate, raised my head and looked straight at him "What do you mean we started on the wrong foot? I didn't lie to you. When would I even have had time to lie to you?"
"Remember our chat at the café? I'm sure you do. It wasn't that long ago. Well, when I ask a question I expect to get the truth."
I kept looking directly at him "I don't know what you mean. Everything I told you was true. I had no reason to lie. Besides, what could I possibly have lied about?"
"I asked you why you became the invisible girl an..."
"And I told you" I jumped in not letting him finish his sentence. "I didn't lie."
"Lying by omission is still lying. Who is Mark? And before you answer I'll just point out that you are a sleep talker. Just in case you didn't know"
Mark!
That name just made me sick. I pushed away my plate, got up from the table and went to sit on the sofa.
Even with my back turned to him I could feel his eyes following me, taking in every move I made. I could just imagine him as a wolf, carefully hidden in the trees silently watching as his prey goes about its business oblivious of the imminent danger. Sitting down I avoided looking in his direction and just stared and the turned off TV while playing with my ring.
"Are you going to tell me what I said in my sleep?"
"No. So, who is Mark?"
"My ex. Mr. Prince charming himself. At least, he was in the beginning. Look, I don't know what you want me to say, we were together, then he found someone else and we weren't together anymore. It's like I told you before, either I was too much or I wasn't enough."
"He doesn't sound like prince charming to me. He didn't sound like it last night either"
"What do you want?! I mean really, why are you here? What's the point of all these games and riddles and... Oh, I don't know everything! What do you want from me?! I told you, he's gone. What's the point of talking about him?" by now I was fighting to hold back the tears. I sure as hell wasn't going to cry in front of this stranger.
Is he a stranger though? I'm not so sure anymore. But I don't even know his name. My mind was in frenzy and then all of a sudden I noticed the silence. He wasn't saying anything, and I half expected him to get up and do something annoying like he did last night. I turned to look at him but he just stared at me from his chair at the table without saying a word.
It was a deep silence. The kind of silence that begs to be filled with sound. Any sound. After a couple of minutes I just couldn't take the silence any more. "He wasn't good for me. I thought he was. I was wrong. I pushed myself to be more than I thought I can be because he kept saying that I'm not good enough. And once I was more than before he said I was too much. That he couldn't handle me anymore and so he left. Not before he made sure to tell me how I ruined everything." He still said nothing. Just kept looking at me and waited as if my explanation wasn't enough. I knew it wasn't but I really didn't feel like talking about this anymore.
I turned my head looking for the TV remote and as I moved my hand towards it I heard his chair move a little and I stopped. He still wasn't saying anything and the silence was driving me crazy. Fixing my gaze on my ring and twisting it with my other hand I felt the words come out in an attempt to fill the space with noise. "I don't know what I was saying in my sleep. But the last time we talked was after I found out about the other woman. Honestly, I didn't care. At that point I was just happy to have him out of my life and I told him that. Things were said and he left." I finally turned to look at him "there, satisfied now?"
"Not good enough. Try again."
I could feel my frustration bubbling to the surface but I knew what he meant so I just took a deep breath, pulled my knees up to my chest and stared at an invisible spot on the floor. "I may have told him something about his manhood and the fact that the only way he can keep a woman around is by making her feel worthless without him. He got really angry and tried to show me what a man he is. I ended up with a black eye, he ended up with black and blue balls." I was smirking now "I think I won."
I heard the chair scrape the floor and he sat down on the opposite side of the sofa. Close but too close. The perfect distance in that moment.
"If you won why give up? Not everyone is an idiot like him."
"I know. I just don't think I can do this again. Besides, I'm not sure I'm cut out for the whole relationship thing. I can be very stubborn sometimes and I tend to argue about things"
"No shit!"
I looked at him smiling "Yes shit!"
"I like that smile. It goes well with your face. You need to smile more"
He got off the sofa and went back to the kitchen to re-heat our dinner while I sat there watching this strange man owning the kitchen as if he were in his own home. This was such a weird situation and yet somehow felt normal. Just a couple having dinner. Except we weren't a couple, I didn't even know his name. I didn't know anything about him. Although that wasn't really true was it?
What did I know about him?
He's smart. His eyes spoke of cunning intelligence and wit. They were dark but not dangerous. Not to me. He calls himself the wolf and I can see why. He walks like an Alpha wolf, aware of his surroundings at all times and aware of his place in it - at the top. No fear, no hesitation... no, take that back. There is something there, maybe not fear but something else; I wish I could put my finger on it. He's so fucking good at looking calm and in control.
The noise of plates being placed on the table and the chair being moved brought me back to the moment and I went to sit at the table. We were facing each other but while I could feel him looking at me I focused on my plate. I was trying to steal a few glances at him when I thought he wasn't looking but he was always looking and smiling that annoying smile of his. The one that says
I know you're uncomfortable and I love it
. The one that makes me so angry and annoyed and frustrated because I know it's true.
He still wasn't saying anything. I guess he wasn't joking when he said this is my opportunity to talk and ask him questions. If only I knew what to ask..."So" I said. Finally looking at him "what happens now?"
"What do you mean?"
"I don't know, forget that. It wasn't a proper question anyway."
"No. It was and I want to know what you mean. So just say it."
"What happens now? I mean, we finish dinner and then what? You go home? You stay here watching me sleep again? We start dating like those couples at the café? I don't know what to expect from you. I'm pretty sure dating is not an option. Besides I think we're past that already. So what happens now?"
"It depends. It's up to you. What do
