The two scariest words
If you ask a group of submissive women for a list of scary words you will usually hear whip, cane, crazy, sadistic and so on. I have done just that a few times through the years and while it has led to several fascinating conversations the two words that I think should scare them the most have never made the list.
We met on the BDSM section of an adult bulletin board. My last submissive and I had parted more than a year before and my profile was honest about the fact that I was interested in playmates but mostly looking for my perfect woman. It was also clear in the fact that I wouldn't send private messages to any woman who didn't contact me first. Anna found both statements interesting and contacted me leading to three weeks of messages, emails and conversations before we made a date.
The first of the two scariest words should be "observant."
By the time she came over for dinner I knew what sort of woman she was, what she liked, what she hated, what she needed and what warmed her passions. I also knew that she was nowhere near as experienced as she pretended and above all I knew that she was a genuinely sweet and giving person which, I found very appealing. The one thing I didn't know was what she looked like. Of course, we had traded multiple pictures but in the world of Instagram filters that's not to be relied on. If I had seen her at the grocery store, I would have found her pretty and handsomely built. Seen through the natural filter of budding affection I found her beautiful and deliciously statuesque.
Dinner was much more about relaxing her and getting to know each other than eating but she found the simple fare delicious and was impressed that I love to cook and do it well. I did most of the talking while we ate, not out of ego, but because it let her enjoy the conversation more. Most men have no idea how hard it is for a woman to be charming and ladylike with a virtual stranger under any circumstance. Dominating the conversation also allowed me to use the two secret weapons of seduction, a good sense of humor and a decent vocabulary. Over a desert of home-made key lime pie, she shared the fact that in all the times she had pictured our first meeting she had never once pictured herself giggling. Wearing my best deadpan, I told her that she was always welcome to laugh in my presence as long as she wasn't pointing at anything. It took her about three seconds to see the humor then I discovered that she had a laugh so feminine and genuine that it gave me an instant erection.
I consider undressing a woman right after you feed her rude. Since it was a mild evening with at least an hour of daylight left I suggested a tour of my yard assuring her as I did that her shoes would not be harmed. A free tip for any man who happens to read this; if you find cold showers appealing you can guarantee a plethora of them by allowing harm to come to a woman's nice shoes, a bra that really fits or her hairdo before she has to go out. Three mistakes that I do not make. We walked slowly along the flagstone path that winds through my back yard with me pointing out interesting plants and flowers and even bragging a little about growing most of my own spices. After about ten minutes we wound up at the two-person swing on my back porch. As we sat down, I pulled her close but not too close and for a few minutes we quietly watched the sunset together. After a time, she thanked me for the nice dinner then asked, "Are you really going to do all the things we talked about to me?"
I smiled and replied, "All of them would be a bit much for one night but you are about to have a memorable experience."
"Are you going to hurt me?"
"That's kind of a fuzzy term for people like us but I don't think I will do anything you won't enjoy."
"What if I change my mind?"
"I'll walk you to your car and kiss you goodnight then take a sleeping pill after you text me that you got home safe."
"Why a sleeping pill?"
Another smile, "Well, the only other choice would be to beat my dick to death, or I won't get any sleep."
That got me another of her beautiful laughs and she snuggled in a little closer before asking "What happens if I can't" She paused for a moment searching for the right words, "finish the way you want?"
"I will understand that sex is about much more than that and not bruise your most delicate spot trying."
She moved even closer then addressed her last worry, "Will you use zip ties to restrain me? The last Dom I was with used zip ties."
"No, I won't, and he was definitely an idiot."
She gave me a puzzled look seeming to wonder if she should be offended and asked, "What makes you say that?"
"I knew he was an idiot when he let you get away. The fact he used a restraint that can easily cause an injury was just icing on the cake."
That got me a smile and "You don't have to wait until I leave to kiss me."
I kissed her softly and sweetly. Then I kissed her passionately. Then I put my hand on the back of her head and kissed her like I owned her. The third one left her breathless. She was already becoming soft and compliant as I led her into the house.
We worked together to remove her clothing and I made sure she knew that I was very pleased with what that revealed. She didn't have a perfect body, I'm not sure any woman does, but she was all woman. Soft where she should be soft and curved where she should be curved and very very real. I ran my hands all over her both to enjoy the feel of her and to start getting her used to my touch. When I touched her intimately, she gasped just a little at the intrusion, probably slightly embarrassed that she was already becoming moist, but she relaxed when I made my approval clear.
I let her see the wide leather restraints before I put them on her wrists and ankles and took care to adjust them just right before I used a snap clip to bind her wrists together in front of her then I pointed towards the hallway and told her to go use the restroom and come back. When she returned, I led her to the den which I use as an exercise room and bound her to my heavy bag. I positioned her with her arms around the bag and stretched up tall but not on her tip toes. As I positioned and bound her, I used my gentlest voice to explain that she would be here for a while and that she was allowed to speak but I would prefer that she keep it to a minimum. I then reminded her of her safe word but told her that she would not need it since she could simply tell me if something was too much. I also told her that I admired her courage. She could tell from my voice that my admiration was genuine, I can't imagine letting someone make me helpless like that, much less doing it knowing that they were going to beat me.
An observer might have wondered why I kept my voice gentle and my words complementary. In books and movies Doms are always yelling at their slaves and calling them names. In real life, a sane submissive is already scared half to death when you get ready to play and scaring her further isn't going to lead to a good result. By the same token, if surrendering total control to you isn't enough and you need to build your ego even more by insulting her, she isn't the problem.