The Cannabis Cup

The legalisation of medicinal marijuana provided an unexpected opportunity for the Selentia Group, and after months of negotiation with government agencies were successful in their application to begin production supplying to the local medical centers and hospitals. As is generally the case at Selentia though, one thing leads to another and with the addition of extra security cameras, their web site live streaming took on a whole new dimension with the Selentia Pony Girls over the spring and summer.

As autumn began, the preparations for the Annual Selentia Easter Stampede were well under way with unprecedented bookings, more competition courses, more camping grounds and an extended time frame for the entire stampede. Scheduling the pony girl competition events along with live streaming, commentary broadcasting and the on track reporters had to be well synchronised. Food, drinks, firewood for cooking and heating were all sourced locally or on site, even the eggs came straight from the chickens arses. By the time anyone could stop to relax the stampede was almost over.

As the sun began to rise over the central hub of Selentia on the last competition day of the stampede, those who were awake early enough began to congregate around the familiar smell of bacon, sausages steak and eggs being cooked on the wood fired barbecue for the big breakfast. It wasn't just the smell of food that attracted them to the community area at this ridiculous time of day, the inaugural Selentia Cannabis Cup was scheduled to start at 7.00am. The punters gathered to listen to the live broadcast and watch the race on the big screen under the roof. The bookie regularly called out the updated odds for each of the Selentia Pony Girls, Alicia, Phoebe and Storm but the punters weren't prepared to part with their hard earned, until they had witnessed the pre race Selentia March and heard the track reporters interview with T.O.P. The big screen fired up and the commentary broadcast began.

"Welcome ladies and gentlemen to the morning of the eighth...NINTH day of the Selentia Easter Stampede, it's a bleary eyed 6.00am I'm your host Wayne Kerr and with me this morning is none other, than the manager of Selentia, Avril Montgomery. Good morning Avril."

"Good morning Wayne."

"The stampede has been an absolute cracker this Easter Avril. You must be pretty happy with the turnout and the quality of the competitions?"

"Yes Wayne I'm delighted, the whole stampede has come together nicely, all the camping grounds have been full, the pony girls have been really terrific, whether it was the drafting, short courses, cross country, endurance, sprints or recreation it's been an amazing time."

"Amazing alright. NINE days of it and counting. Did you ever have any doubts when you decided on the extended time period for the stampede?"

"Of course Wayne. I think we all did, but as you know we don't discriminate against others careers or geographical position, which is why we operate 24/7 all year round, but we still wanted to give as many people as possible the opportunity to be here for our annual stampede for the period that suited them over the holidays and full moon phase."

"Glorious weather too. Cool sunny days, comfortable nights, and how about that full moon? Seriously the only time I've been frightened by my own shadow at night. Perfect for night time recreation."

"Haha..Yeh, my shadow sneaks up on me then jumps out at me when I least expect it. Seriously though, our local weather guru kept us informed of emerging weather patterns, and yes, once again the full moon was absolutely fantastic. It was so wonderful to see all the pony girls hooked up to their carts, hooved...harnessed...bridled... restrained...and controlled."

"You almost made that sound pornographic. There are a few people wandering around here this morning looking very feral Avril, but none without a smile on their face. So, your favourite event?"

"Surely you know I'm going to say the drafting events."

"Yep, sure did, and that's why we've put together a highlights package as well as FULL replays, of EVERY pony girl in EVERY drafting event, ready to watch or download NOW Coming up, the much anticipated Selentia Cannabis Cup. We'll cross live to our track 'n' stats reporter pony girl Dasha and catch up for an interview with T.O.P. Selentia's legendary...Trainer Of Pets. Check the web site for full live stream coverage of the Cannabis Cup for just 10 cents a minute. Don't go away, we'll be right back."

As the big screen broke from the commentary the crowd began to start applauding and walking towards the edge of the chopper pad at the central hub. The Selentia Pony Girls paraded around in full equipage without reins or carts and were controlled from the centre by Miss Holly. With two simultaneous cracks of her bull whip Phoebe, Alicia and Storm split to start the perfectly choreographed spectacular known as the Selentia March. For the next four minutes the gathered crowd were silenced, with only the sounds of the bullwhip, stomping hooves and rattling chains echoing through the forest. A display of power, strength and the only chance for the punters to physically view the pony girl their money was going on before the race. When the Selentia March finished the crowds applause continued as the pony girls were led back to the stabling area for final checks and to be hooked to their carts ready to compete for the Selentia Cannabis Cup. The crowd gradually dispersed for the big breakfast and the studio commentary broadcast returned.

"Welcome back to the Selentia Easter Stampede I'm your host Wayne Kerr, and with me of course is Avril Montgomery, manager of Selentia. I have to say Avril your pony girls are looking FIRED UP. How did the Cannabis Cup come about and why the decision to initially only run the Selentia Pony Girls?"

"The course was built for reasons of productivity, and obviously given the product, we needed to ensure that access was inconspicuous, difficult, but still enabled us to transport water. We were then able to connect that track to Buloke Boulevard picnic area, and ultimately reach the main arterial track. The decision to run only Selentia Pony Girls has been purely a safety precaution. The track is still quite dangerous and we're not prepared to risk injury to visitors, particularly in a competitive environment."

"We would expect nothing less, Avril. A wise decision indeed. I'm quite sure the punters would like to know how the race will be run."

"Of course Wayne. As we all just saw the pony girls are all hooved, bound and bridled in exactly the same manner, the carts they will be hooked up to are identical and they each start with four full 20 litre water drums on their carts. For an added bonus each has also been fitted with a pre set multiple shock electro tail plug that will activate randomly during the course of the race at varying levels of intensity.

There are four check points that they need to stop at so the attendant can unload and empty one water barrel per check point then put it back onto the cart fully emptied.

Given the nature of the course and check points the starts will be staggered by three minute intervals with the running order of Alicia, Phoebe then Storm. By the time they reach the main arterial track all the water drums will be empty for the final sprint home. The course distance is 1600 metres or 1.6 kilometers. Quickest time takes the inaugural Selentia Cannabis Cup."

"This is going to be a fucking EPIC BRACE yourselves ladies and gentlemen as we cross live to our track 'n' stats reporter pony girl Dasha and catch up with T.O.P. Good morning Dasha."

"Good morning Wayne and Avril. What a beautiful day for it here on the track side. I have to say that Selentia March was among the best I've ever seen, those pony girls are just absolute fucking units. Talk about psyched up..WOW. Now, I've just finished walking the beginning stages of this course through to the second check point in my hooves and all I can say is O.M.F.G. this is one torturous track. I LOVE it. As we have come to expect from the Selentia track crew it's in really good condition, no debris, dry and bit sandy that might bog the heavier cart weights in a bit, but with some really nice cushioning and leg drive under hoof through the buloke forest."

"Is the crowd starting to build down there yet?"

"Yes Wayne, there seems to be a few early birds getting to the best vantage points now heading down from the central hub, and some are going through to Buloke Boulevard picnic area where the turn for the run home begins...Hang on a second, I'm with T.O.P. now."

"The floor's yours Dasha."

"Good morning T.O.P. are you ready for the interview?"

"Good morning Dasha. Yes, let's do it."

"OK. I want to cover your Selentia Pony Girls Alicia, Phoebe and Storm for the punters. Firstly, my personal favourite Alicia, she looks very refreshed this year and just powered through the drafting events with you. Has there been a change in her lifestyle?"

"Not so much a change but more a refocus on her strengths. With Phoebe coming to us last winter we've been able to split some of the day to day tasks so Alicia has been able to concentrate more on forestry management, in particular drafting cypress pine logs for kindling or milling and clearing debris that has become bush fire fuel."

"I was watching you two during the drafting event and it took me a little while to pick up on why you don't even talk during the event. The signals are very subtle. Is that something you two have developed from familiarity?"

"Familiarity certainly helps, but with the physicality and at times equipment or machinery noise during day to day operations, those subtle signals eliminate the need to talk, yell or even cease production. In turn we can get to the point of keeping oxygen in reserve and increase stamina."

"Alicia's leg drive is just so explosive and sets her up to maintain momentum. She is so composed and very impressive. She is at very short odds to take out the Cannabis Cup. Now Phoebe. She is just as busy as a blue arsed fly isn't she?"

"Yes, Phoebe is one of those naturals that comes around once in a hundred years. She just has that instinct and knack of knowing where to be or when to be there. Very service orientated and very much autonomous."

"I watched her for a awhile the other day, One minute she was hooked up to the flat top cart getting bagged firewood to the camp sites, then off getting fire wood for the central hub. Not long after she was hooked up to the taxi cart near the drinking area running people back and forth. How on earth did she end up at Selentia?"

"Phoebe was born for it and actually found us. As I eluded to earlier she has taken the pressure off Alicia and seems to have taken it upon herself to do the little extra 1% tasks during the day that can otherwise cause fatigue, and in turn create safety issues in the forest."

"She is DROP DEAD gorgeous, very quick, and with you in the drivers seat, pushed me to the limit yesterday in the endurance event. She's at short odds too but Is she capable of snatching the Cannabis Cup?"

"As you say she is very quick, but more importantly quick between the ears, persistent and just will not give up."

"Last but not least, the LITTLEST HOTTIE and your newest addition, Storm. How good is she? Intermediate regional champ, four starts for four wins at the local derby's. How have you been handling her introduction to the Selentia way of life?"

"Storm is a real competitor, grew up locally, she's very aware of the environment in front that needs to be traversed, where the wheels of the cart are and where her hooves need to be. She's very agile through tight spaces and over rough terrain. Worst still, she absolutely hates losing, so it's really only been a matter of getting her to do more of what she loves to do in the rough stuff as well as increasing her sprint distances and decreasing her recovery times between sprints."

"The other day I was right behind her and yourself coming into the first turn of the cross country track and heading into the rocky escarpment and before I knew it she was 20 or 30 metres ahead and hadn't thrown you out of your seat. She is just greased lightening in the rough stuff. Can your newest pony girl beat the strength of Alicia and endurance of Phoebe to win the Cannabis Cup?"

"She is in with a chance, no doubt about that. The track is well suited to her agility so she could easily make up time through the tight spaces and rough stuff, then hope her sprint training has made an improvement to her speed over the run home."

"Do you like what I did with tying in Storm and greased lightening?"

"I did. Very nice tie in."

"Well there you have it ladies and gentlemen, straight from the head horses mouth, irrespective of the odds there's a split hair between the Selentia Pony Girls and in this race, misjudging a tight space by a bees dick is going to ruin someone's day. I'm that excited I'm signing up for next years Cannabis Cup today."

"What makes you think you'll have to wait until next year?"

"What are you talking about?"

"You, me, we could do the touristy thing and do a lap."

"Are you serious? Oh My Gord, you are such a fucking romantic. This is one excited pony girl Dasha reporting LIVE track side. Back to you in the studio,"

"Thank you Dasha. Well Avril, T.O.P. didn't give away too much there for the punters."

"No he didn't Wayne which strikes me as little strange, he's usually got the hot tip but like Dasha said, there's a split hair between them and a whole lot can go very wrong, very quickly."

"Well, we have a few minutes left, now Avril I have to ask, your new project the Pony Girl Rehabilitation Clinic what inspired this it's quite bizarre?"

"You of course would be aware that our drafting and carting lifestyles have been heavily criticised and discriminated against by the indoor latex show ponies for the last dark decade that nearly sent us all into extinction and with it, nearly a century of pony carting history. We decided to set up the clinic as a way to expose Pony Girls to REAL TIME OUTDOOR physical activity and exercise to increase fitness, stamina and strength.

The natural vegetation here in the forest releases volatile phytoncides providing fresh air that when inhaled increase the natural killer cells in the blood stream, reduce health risks associated with stress and disease as well as promote weight loss or control. This forest therapy aspect of the clinic has been in the planning stages so we could collate the physical evidence of proof that each coincides to achieve healthy outcomes."

"This truly is incredible stuff Avril. It should make the indoor latex show ponies feel pretty stupid NEXT UP, the race you have been waiting for, the Selentia Cannabis Cup 7am eastern standard time check the web site for FULL coverage, LIVE stream for JUST 10 cents a minute. It will be an EPIC, that about wraps it up for us in the studio but hang around as we cross live to the stabling area for the final prep, Avril, thanks for popping in and congratulations on hosting yet another awesome stampede."

"The pleasure is ours Wayne and Thank you."