Surviving the Rich-Sunshine and Sir

Author's Note: I apologize profusely for the delay. I actually had most of this and the next chapter done weeks ago. But I had surgery and unfortunately the medications I've been on have made looking at screens, particularly television and computer, almost impossible. I get dizzy, nauseous, and tired. So please bear with me, I don't have too much of the medication left. On the flip side, it allowed me to really think about the ending, and I realized the original ending doesn't work anymore. The characters and their trajectories have changed, so I'm excited to see where they end up. Thanks for reading!

*****

Embracing Her Desires

"Because she is fierce!"

"As a storm!" Reagan yelled, her tiny fist in the air.

"As a shark!" Jimmy roared.

Reagan sighed and groaned. "Not like a shark Daddy. I don't like sharks."

"As a dolphin?" Jimmy asked.

Reagan giggled, her strawberry blond curls bouncy around. "Dolphins aren't fierce."

"They can be pretty brutal," Rae said from the couch. "Don't be fooled by the smile, they're fierce."

Jimmy nodded, and said, "And what are they singing peanut?"

Reagan danced in her seat singing, "Thanks for all the fish!"

"That's my girl!" Jimmy said, proudly. The two of them were at the kitchen table working on a costume for the living museum at Reagan's school. He had a gift for it, and Reagan was deep in a Daddy's girl phase, so any time spent with her father was treasured.

A smiling Killian flashed through Rae's mind and her heart twinged. She shoved it away and stood. "So how's it coming?"

"It's goin good Mamas," Jimmy said. "We'll get it finished in time for the big day."

Reagan gave her a thumbs up. "Goin good Mamas!" Rae kissed the top of her head as she passed. Mamas was what Reagan called her when she first started speaking, and it became one of those things that stuck.

"Don't forget about tomorrow," Jimmy said.

"What's happening tomorrow?" she asked in a clueless voice. "My lady brain plum forgot."

Reagan laughed and Jimmy straightened up. "Alright smart ass," he said, in his best Scottish brogue, which was pretty terrible. "I drop Reagan off at school, pack our bags, pick her up early, meet my brother at the hotel, swim, and have fun with family."

Reagan cheered and Rae said, "I should be out of work no later than five, hopefully it won't take me more than hour to get to the hotel."

"You can't leave earlier?"

"Not likely, but I don't have to be in until one on Tuesday."

"How generous of him." Coming from someone who missed family event after family event because of work the snide comment was completely uncalled for. She opened her mouth to reply but he kept going. "So, one of my servers told me he was waiting tables at another restaurant and witnessed your boss drive a man to tears."

"That's ridiculous, Killian's merciless but-"

"He seems like the kind of guy you'd hate from what I hear, and now that everyone knows my wife works for him I hear plenty."

"Rumors. Killian is-"

"You've never been able to stand rich assholes who treat others like crap, I'm surprised you can stomach working for him."

"There's a difference between doing his job and treating people like crap. In fact he treats people-"

"You should hear some of the stories. He sounds like a real piece of work."

"He treats people with-"

"Money really make these people think they're better than the rest of us."

He was looking right at her as she tried to finish her sentence again, but he just kept going, getting louder. Rae could keep talking, raising her voice as well, but she'd only end up frustrated and upset so she shut up. What he had to say mattered more than anything she could possibly contribute to the conversation. That was the only conclusion that made sense anymore. It wasn't like she was in another room, she was always right in front of him, eye to eye, and he trampled over her words, without fail. She turned her back on him and grabbed a beer from the fridge, trying to hide the anger from Reagan.

Jimmy finally took a breath and Reagan said, "What were you saying Mommy?"

At six she already noticed how her father cut her mother off repeatedly. When she asked about it, Rae told her it was because he grew up in a big family, and big families have a tendency to talk over one another, which was true, to a certain extent. She'd even told Jimmy that Reagan noticed and he needed to stop, and he had. For a couple days.

The doorbell rang and she exchanged surprised glances with Jimmy. It was close to eight. He answered the door and said, "Rae, you have to sign for a package. It's from your boss."

Rae walked over to the door, and signed for the package. It looked like clothing, which was an odd thing to have sent to her house. Killian had been in New York for a week, and was flying back tonight. The office had been quiet without him and Stella, and she was looking forward to seeing them both.

"What is it?" Jimmy asked.

She ignored him and carried the box upstairs. Placing it on the bed she grabbed scissors and cut the tape. Jimmy appeared with Reagan right behind. "Did you get a present?" she asked excitedly.

Not a present," Rae said, pulling a black wrap skirt, white high collar blouse, and black sweater from the box. "A uniform." While the skirts from the boutique were all form fitting, the black wrap skirt would hang looser.

"A uniform?" Raegan said, bewildered.

Rae smiled and kissed her head. "It's for work. Time to brush your teeth and get your pajamas on."

Reagan made a face but disappeared out the door without another word. Rae hung the clothes on the closet door. She liked the skirt and sweater, but didn't care for the high collar on the shirt.

Jimmy stood next to her and said, "A uniform? The new clothes you bought are unlike anything I've seen you wear before, and now this? None of this is like you, or normal."

"It is for him," she said, examining the ensemble. "Everything, down to what most would consider the most trivial detail, is carefully crafted. He controls the narrative, therefore he controls the story. It's about winning."

"And how you're dressed is part of his strategy? C'mon Rae, you're just a..." He caught himself, but glorified secretary hung in the air between them. He was unaware she knew how he felt. It was pure chance she'd overheard him say it to his brother on the phone, but she had. It came down to the money, she was almost sure of it. If she were making the money she was at a job he considered equal to or a step above his own that would be one thing, but she was making only a thousand less a year with better benefits as a glorified secretary to his management position.

"Well you'd know better than I," she said. "Having dealt with the man for two years before going to work for him."

"It doesn't make you uncomfortable that your boss is picking out clothes for you? I am woman hear me roar, you?"

She shook her head and said, "Look at this outfit. The women I've seen wear this style are professionals who like to express their femininity by wearing a stylish sweater and boots instead of a suit jacket and sensible heels. This is about conveying a certain image to the potential client we're meeting with tomorrow."

"Which brings me to my next question," Jimmy said, crossing his arms. "Why would you be meeting with a client? You're not a lawyer."

She smiled and said, "I'm going to look up Mr. Bennet and find out. Killian has a reason, he always does."

Rae tucked Reagan in and then went downstairs to look up Julian Bennet. He'd built a successful business from the ground up and now had stores all over the Midwest. When the recession hit and many companies established hiring freezes, he did the opposite and gave his people raises. His logic being, they needed the money more than ever. His employee turnover rate was one of the lowest in the nation and two of his three daughters ran the company alongside him. Rae looked up his daughters as well and understood exactly what Killian was doing. She smiled and sat back thinking about the impression he was hoping to make. She could do even better.

*************************

Rae secured her hair right behind the base of her ears and pulled on a pair of black boots. She looked in the mirror and smiled. The ruffle blouse she'd bought over a year ago as an incentive to lose the weight wrapped around her waist and the top of her hips, then tied in the back, the ruffles going around her collar and down the front. Once she put on the sweater it looked like a high class blouse, and so much better than the one Killian sent. She threw on her coat and rushed out the door. Finding the family photo she wanted took more time than she expected and now she was running behind. She was about to throw her bag on the passenger seat and noticed an envelope with Mamas written across it. She opened it and tears almost overwhelmed her. Reagan had drawn a picture of them holding hands, and Rae was in her new outfit. Reagan had written that she liked the uniform and that Mr. Laird seemed nice, and most of all she was proud of her Mamas. The spelling errors were cute in and of themselves, but the sentiment about Killian and being proud meant she'd caught everything the previous evening and she wanted to make her mother feel better.

"I love you so much sweetheart," Rae whispered, keeping the tears at bay. She didn't have time for them.

It was odd that Jimmy hadn't come home after dropping Reagan off at school, but she assumed he'd gone to get coffee and was stuck in line. She pulled out of the garage and headed down the road, already thick with rush hour traffic. At a stop light she texted Killian to let him know she was running late, wishing Stella was at the office. But she was taking Mondays off from now on, slowly phasing herself out.

The light changed and Rae pressed down on the gas. Her car shuddered, coughed, and then died. "No," she said, turning the key. "Not now." She kept trying but it refused to start. Horns started blaring and she flipped on her hazards, still trying to get the car started. "Come on. Not now!"

It was no use. She punched the steering wheel. "Fuck! Goddamn fucking fuck! Fuck!" The cacophony of horns piled up behind her, the hazards only visible to those in her immediate vicinity. She dug her insurance card out of the glove box and called the emergency number. After a couple minutes of back and forth the representative said she'd send a tow truck. She called Jimmy next, surprised when it rang the full seven times and went to voicemail. "My car died, and I'm sitting in the right lane at the route 34 light. A tow truck is on the way, and I need you to drive me to work. Call me."

She texted him for good measure, and then the lights of a police cruiser were suddenly behind her. The cop made sure there was enough space for the tow truck when it arrived while she stood by the side of the road calling Jimmy for the third time. It went immediately to voicemail. She stared at her phone shocked, and then fury swept through her. She wanted to shout, scream, and rage text Jimmy, but she maintained her outward calm and texted Killian instead, informing him of the situation. He was less than thrilled.

The drive to the mechanics was tortuous. They hit every light, and the truck never managed to reach the speed limit before having to stop. She kept trying Jimmy, but her calls went straight to voicemail every time, infuriating her further. Finally she gave up on him and called a cab. She was still forced to wait at the mechanics for another twenty minutes before it showed, her frustration reaching near epic proportions. She envisioned screaming at Jimmy, telling him off, and walking out on him for good. She'd left him once when Reagan was a toddler. Reagan had woken up in the middle of the night with the flu, and just like today he didn't bother answering his phone. Drinking with his buddies was more important. When he finally rolled in at six in the morning she and Reagan were gone. She'd spent two weeks at her mother's house forced to confront the reality that she could in no way support her daughter without Jimmy. He'd sworn to do better, but it was getting the DUI that finally curtailed his drinking. The only good thing to come out of the whole mess.

The entire cab ride she prepared herself for the lunch, going over what she'd learned about Julian Bennet. The driver pulled up in front of The Hillcrest and she practically jumped out of the cab. It felt odd walking in as a guest, and when the phone rang she had to fight the instinct to answer it.

Lucia ran around the desk and gave her a hug, while Ryan answered the phone, smiling in greeting. Lucia held her at arm's length and said, "Is that the coat? Oh my God, it is! And I love the boots. Working for Mr. Laird looks good on you!"

Rae laughed and started unbuttoning the coat. "Thanks. It's definitely different." Lucia took her coat and Rae said, "This feels weird and wrong. Let me hang up my coat."

"That would be inappropriate. I'll take the ticket Lucia, thank you."

Killian's presence at her shoulder was warm, the undercurrent of electricity making the gossamer hairs behind her ears stand up. She closed her eyes briefly, forcing the shitty morning from her mind and relaxed her shoulders. Fixing a smile on her face, she said, "Inappropriate is a bit of is stretch. I'm not one of the elite." She gestured to the desk and coatroom. "This is me."

He smiled and pocketed the ticket. "Not anymore." His eyes drifted over her body and he said, "Nice ruffles."

"Thank you. How was your flight?" She hated the measured small talk, but appearance was important.

"Just fine." The door opened and Killian transformed. There was no sign of the predator, he was loose and relaxed, exuding warmth and charm. He'd even forgone his usual black suit for a charcoal grey pinstripe, which actually lent itself to the friendliness in his demeanor. "Julian," he said, holding his hand out. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you in person. Camilla has nothing but praise, and she isn't easily impressed."

Julian Bennet looked to be in his sixties with thick, grey and silver hair, and when he smiled the lines around his eyes made him look like a kindly grandpa who'd play with the kids and tell great stories. He shook Killian's hand and said, "Killian. Camilla speaks highly of you as well, and all things considered that's impressive. I've never known anyone to have such a high regard for their ex."

"We are friends and colleagues always," Killian said. "Regardless of marital status." Lucia took Julian's coat and Killian looked at Rae. "Julian this is my assistant Rae Ingram. Rae, Julian Bennet."

Julian shook her hand and said, "It's a pleasure to meet you Rae."

"You too Mr. Bennet. Your store is the only one my daughter gets excited about going to."

"The samples?"

"She calls it lunch."

He laughed and slid his ticket into his wallet. Rae fished her phone out of her bag to put it on vibrate, and a photo of her, Jimmy, and Reagan on a sailboat almost fell out. Julian saw it and said, "May I?" She handed him the photo and he smiled. "Beautiful family, and quite the boat. Yours?"

"Maybe one day," she replied. "My father in law was in the Navy and never strays far from the water. He wanted to make sure Reagan knew her way around a boat."

He looked positively delighted and said, "And does she?"

"Well, she refers to the driver's side of the car as port and the passenger side as starboard."

He laughed again and handed her the photograph. "Wonderful. If you'll excuse me for a moment, I'd like to wash my hands before we sit down."

Killian nodded and watched him disappear around the corner while she put the photo back in her bag. When he looked at her, his eyes were full of pride, and appreciation. "You researched."

"Why Mr. Laird, whatever do you mean?"

Killian laughed, and for split second she thought he was going to kiss her right there in front of everyone. Instead he slid his hands into his pockets and said, "Well done."

"Every word was true," she said. He raised an eyebrow, and she fought a smile. "I didn't lie."

"And Julian's already taken with your daughter."

"I am your assistant," she said. "I'm doing what I can to assist."

Killian's eyes flicked to the desk where Ryan and Lucia were trying to pretend they weren't watching. "The ruffles were a better choice, and the hair style is perfect."

"Thank you. Mr. Bennet's daughters are an inspiration, on so many levels."

Hunger flashed through his gaze and she swallowed her breath to suppress the shudder. After Tony's they'd spent a week acting like teenagers, stealing moments together, which with Stella there wasn't always easy. But what he did with those moments left her yearning. Then he flew to New York, and she'd thought of him constantly, even coming up with excuses to call or text, although she didn't do either. She had some pride left, not a lot, but some.

"Right this way Mr. Laird," Lucia said, when Julian returned. Killian gestured for her to go first, so Rae walked with Lucia to a table in the main dining room, which was unusual, the fact that it was in the corner of course, wasn't. But then Killian surprised her further by hanging back slightly and letting Julian choose his seat first, which ended up being the corner chair.

Rae sat next to him and took a chance. She leaned in and said, "Back to the wall-"

"And know where the exits are," Julian finished, his eyes twinkling.

It was a variation of the saying she knew, and she smiled. "The Chicago way."

"The gangster culture has had quite an influence on our city, hasn't it Rae?"

She laughed lightly and said, "It certainly has Mr. Bennet."

"I'd say Mr. Bennet is my father, but I'm too old for that now. Please call me Julian."

Killian sat down and the talk at the table was light, with Rae getting Julian to open up and share some stories. She was right, he had some great ones. At one point she excused herself and went to the ladies room and checked her phone. It was filled with missed calls, multiple voicemails, and texts from Jimmy. He was sorry he missed her calls, he'd gone into work and forgot to charge his phone, it died and he didn't know, please call him he was worried. It was completely plausible, and every instinct within screamed it was total bullshit. He never mentioned going into work, not once.

She walked out of the ladies room and was just about to open the alcove door when Killian came through. "You left Julian by himself?"

He wedged his foot against the door and said, "He's on a call with his wife. The respectful thing to do was give him some privacy."

"What if someone tries to come through the door?"

"They'll have to cope." He slid a hand around her waist and pulled her to him, her body molding perfectly to his. His eyes flicked to the clips holding her hair back and he brushed his fingers down her cheek. "I missed you."

Before she could respond, his lips were pressed to hers erasing the thought from her mind. Something about a door, but she didn't care enough to try and remember. She was exactly where she'd wanted to be since feeling him at her shoulder. Sliding her arms around his neck, and entangling her fingers in his hair, she devoured him, turning the tender kiss into a promise of passion yet to come. Killian returned her fire enthusiastically, tightening his embrace, the strength in his grip a turn on all its own. Suddenly he smiled and looked into her eyes. "No better welcome home could a man receive."

"Oh, I could do so much more," she said, nipping his bottom lip then his chin. "But we're in public."

On cue, something hit the door hard, and Ryan said, "What the hell?"

Rae covered her mouth laughing into her hands and ran into the ladies room, while a grinning Killian disappeared into the men's room. After a minute she returned to the table and Killian followed a few minutes later. Again, nothing about why Julian was in need of Killian's skill set was discussed, the lunch a light, social affair. Except it really wasn't. She understood her part and played it well, which was easy to do. Julian was the kind of person she enjoyed talking with, and getting to know. When the bill was dropped Killian insisted on paying since he'd extended the invitation, and after a bit of back and forth Julian relented.