18/March. 10:15pm.
Dear Diary.
The pain has eased now, and there are no marks upon my body. This is how I know I've been forgiven. He likes to see my body flawless and I must alter my manner depending on whether or not my body says I am being punished. If my body is flawed in any way, I sleep at the foot of the bed untouched by Master as I sleep. If my body is flawed I can only speak when spoken to.
Dinner last night –I've been dying to write about it- here's the goss!
I wore my silver collar, the one studded with garnets, with my light silver chain. My black lace blouse over a deep red camisole teamed up with my short black pleated school-girl style skirt, knee high stockings and closed toe heels. I wore my hair up, but left a long fringe out, which I curled. You know men are interested when they'll go out of their way to tuck your fringe away from your eyes.
Alexei bought Grace and my competition, Hannah. I'll get to her in a minute.
Sean came too, which was a surprise to me, he has not come to dinner for over a month, possibly more. Simone, his girl, came half a step behind him sporting a new gold plated chain and collar. I began to wonder if they'd been married during the absence.
Simmy smiled at me quickly in greeting before gluing her eyes on the heels of her master's shoes.
Now for Hannah. Diary this girl is a skank, I don't care if I get 50 spanks per cheek for saying so either. I wanted to grab her filthy paws and stuff them down her whining throat. I was horrified at Master's reaction to her. You've heard of love at first sight? Well this was stiff at first sight. Her tan boobs were literally busting out of the leather corset that was almost cruelly tight around her body. I greeted her in the way I'm required to greet all dinner guests; a kiss on the cheek. Her perfume made the air around her thick and meanly I wondered how she could breathe through that coupled with the corset. I left her kiss till last, the only way I could show my disapproval of the situation.
Later I decided that even if I'd met Hannah under different circumstances I still would dislike her with a passion surpassing the fires of hell. Dinner is always the ice breaker of the evening, giving everyone a chance to get comfortable before the fun begins. So we were sitting around listening to our masters discuss their work, I was sitting to Master's left, chained to his chair, Hannah sat to his right, meaning she was opposite me. I wondered if she felt uncomfortable, being the only girl without a chain, but if she did she didn't show it. She kept speaking out of turn, and the other girls saw it too. Simmy shot me a look that said "What is this chick crazy or something?" I heard Grace shift uncomfortably beside me and knew she was worried at this girl's disobedience too. I wanted to ask if she had been trained, but of course, I could not.
"Do you work?" Hannah asked me. The question caught me off guard. It was not the sub's turn to speak, I knew that too well, but I didn't want to be chastised for being impolite to a guest either. My first instinct was to look to Master for permission to speak, but stopped myself knowing that all eyes where on me. I didn't want my training to show as incomplete by not knowing how to handle this situation. My eyes flicked to Simone for an answer. She looked nervous and very slightly shook her head to signal "No". I met Hannah's blue eyes, but did not speak. Grace shifted again, the clink of her chain loud in the quiet room. "I said do you work Myesisha?" repeated Hannah, speaking slowly as if I was mentally dim. I did not show any sign that I had heard her, or my discomfort at the eyes burning into my flesh. Hannah shifted uncomfortably and locked her gaze on her plate.
Finally Alexei broke the silence by laughing, and nodding at Master, "If you can train this one as well as Lady here you'd be doing her quite the service, wouldn't you say?"
Master seemed displeased. "You mentioned she'd been trained already."
"Oh I have!"
I swear I heard Grace groan then. Hannah reached out and touched Master's forearm, looking into his eyes, "But with a strong man like you..."
"... A strong man like me" Master parroted in a mocking voice, "would not stand for your insolence" I knew then that I'd made the right decision not to speak with her.
Dinner moved along, and soon it was our turn to speak. Master turned to me, almost ritualistically, and invited us subs into the conversation "Lady, Hannah would like to know what you do for a living."
"I work part time as a checkout chick; down at the 7-11" I told Hannah, "I also instruct yoga classes twice a week." I paused, but when no reply was forthcoming I asked "Do you work, Hannah?"
She looked at Master as if he had spoken and told him "Yes, I'm a dancer at club X working 5 nights a week"
To this Grace, the eldest of the four of us, responded "So you let men other than your master feel you up for cheap thrills hey? If you don't mind me asking, is that why you're seeking a new one?"
I thought Hannah's eyes were going to pop out of her head as she leaned across the table to reply, but instead her boobs finally broke free and flopped straight onto her nearly cleared plate. I bit down on my bottom lip to hold back my laughter, but Alexei and Sean had no need to restrain themselves, Sean even applauded. In a panic Hannah attempted to scoop her boobs up and stuff them back into her corset, but lightly Master held both her wrists in one hand. "Leave them," he said. "I want to see."
"But uh..." Hannah started to protest, but was cuffed lightly on the cheek.
"Don't." Masters voice was deceptively quiet.
Everyone appeared to have finished eating, so I gained permission to clear the table and bring the deserts and wine in. As I was returning with the tray, I noticed the evening had started heating up. Master had moved Hannah to his lap and had started to examine her.
I took my seat by Master's side, and he re-attached my chain to my collar, stroking my face lightly before he returned his attention to the skank sitting on his lap. Through the general chatter I watched MY Master gradually strip and tease this girl. I controlled myself, showing no sign of possessiveness, but I felt hurt and angry.
I betrayed myself once though. I'd been talking to Simmy, discussing the best brands of bikini wax actually, when Master must have done something particularly nice and Hannah let out a moan. I felt the muscle in my jaw twitch irritably, and quickly spun my head in Master's direction in the hope his attention was fully focused on Hannah. He gave me the "I saw that" look.
He removed my chain and placed it on the table. "Lady, a small bowl filled with warm water, soap, and a wash-cloth, please." I complied without hesitation or complaint.
I returned, noticing that Simmy and Grace's chains were now on the table with mine. I laid out the objects Master had asked for, and turned to Simmy remembering that I'd wondered earlier if Sean had tied the knot with her. "Simmy, I love your collar by the way! Special occasion?"
"I thought you'd never ask!" She exclaimed, sounding much younger than her 20 years. "We're engaged!"
There where congratulations all round, and torrents of questions for the pair, but for me it was bitter sweet, not knowing if tonight Master would turn away from me; wondering if I'd ever experience the elation that Simmy was. Could I face going to her wedding only to see Hannah on Master's chain?
Master used the cloth and water to clear away Hannah's layers of make-up displaying not only skin in poor condition, but love bites in a line beneath one ear. He said nothing, undoing her hair, ignoring her protests.
"Stand, remove your shoes and stockings" He ordered. Grace raised one eye brow but said nothing. We knew when to be silent.
