The story that follows is a fantasy, containing elements recalling my past. Nobody is under eighteen, and you shouldn't be either, if you're about to read on.
*
My story began soon after leaving sixth form college, when I had just turned eighteen. Well before that, I had offers, but resisted them until I had at least an academic grounding. The offers had been based on what I regarded as my good luck -- I was tall and slim
-- too
slim, in my own view - and had a pretty face, framed by long, thick, shiny, honey-blond hair, which I kept straight, with a centre parting. When I looked at myself in my bedroom mirror, I was always disappointed in my breasts, which were very small, though firm and pointed -- they had just never seemed to grow.
Anyway, when I had finally left college, there was nothing to stop me from accepting a lucrative offer to train as a fashion model, despite my mother's protests -- she wanted me to become 'something decent' like a secretary, where I would 'meet a nice young man.'
Bags packed, I said a tearful farewell to my disapproving mother and silently proud father, and took the train to London and my new life.
Sharing a grotty flat near Westbourne Grove was the best I could do -- my flatmate was Irina, an Estonian model who was working for the agency I had joined, and whose English was minimal.
I soon found that being a fashion model was a tough call -- there was a year of working training, the hours could be long, and the competition fierce, and, at times, bitchy. I loved some of the clothes I got to wear, and the nervously triumphant feelings you got on the catwalk, where you always dreaded tripping in your staggeringly high heels. Sometimes I felt decidedly sexy, and became aroused, knowing that all these people were watching me, my nipples sometimes visible through diaphanous gowns, under which I often went naked, so as to avoid panty-lines etc. But the life wasn't nearly as glamorous as I had believed, explaining why most of the girls I got to know were hankering after 'getting into the movies.' I thought this a distant ambition, until one evening, when I had just finished modelling filmy evening dresses for a store-chain, at a run-of-the-mill salon, a tall, dark middle-aged guy, going grey, dressed in a good suit, approached me in the coffee bar.
'Been watching you,' he announced, without preamble, and with a faint accent I couldn't place. His eyes were wandering between my face and my breasts, which were only covered by a thin layer of green silk -- the last dress, a halter-neck number. It was chilly, and I knew that my nipples poked at the material visibly.
'You are Lisa?' he asked rhetorically, and I nodded.
'I have a proposition for you,' he said.
I gave him THE LOOK. Like, I'd heard this one before.
He laughed, 'Yes, I know. But this is real. I've been watching the way you move, and I like your face too.' Where was this leading, I wondered? I was almost ready to walk out.
He went on: 'Ever thought of getting into films?'
'If this is a chat-up line, I've heard more original ones.'
'I don't blame you for being cautious,' he smiled, and flipped out a card, which he handed to me:-
SINTON PRODUCTIONS
Martin J. Van de Bergh, Director
There was a phone number and website, too. I waited for him to continue. I certainly
should
like to get into films, I thought, but lacked any sort of Drama School preparation, and had a good idea what sort of films that might leave open to me. I told him I had a good job, and was reluctant to risk it by getting into something that couldn't last. He looked me in the eye, a half-smile playing on his lips, and I realised for the first time that he was a good-looking guy. A bit on the old side, maybe, but definitely dishy. Fit-looking, well dressed and smelling of a good cologne --
Monsieur Rochas?
Probably.
'If it's not a rude question, what do you make?' he asked. I told him.
He made a show of taking out a pocket calculator and fiddling with the keys. 'I believe you would be taking home four times that amount, assuming, of course, that we find you suitable,' he said, slipping the calculator back into his pocket.
I wondered about walking out there and then, but there was something hypnotic about the man's gaze. 'Just what sort of films are we talking about?' I asked, then added, 'Porno, for sure.'
He didn't answer, but took a little folder from his jacket pocket, extracted a small stack of postcard size photos, and fanning them out, showed them to me. All were of pretty girls, in evening dress, and every one was a stunner.
'All these girls work for us,' he said, 'do you see any scrubbers?'
I had to admit they were impressive, but I was very suspicious. He went on, 'Look, Lisa, I don't expect instant decisions. Come and have dinner with me tonight, and we'll see if we can come to some arrangement. I expect we can let you carry on with your current employment while you give it a try, eh?'
Perhaps I should have walked, I thought, but I found myself nodding and agreeing to meet him for dinner in a posh West End bistro. I had a definite feeling that I had nothing much to lose. I told him not to come and pick me up, as I had somewhere to go first. I told myself it was for security, but in truth, I didn't want him to see the dump I lived in.
I put on a short black dress which clung nicely to me, I thought. Then, looking at myself in the mirror, I saw it -- the dreaded panty-line. I reached up under the dress and pulled down the silk panties, stepped out of them. Being naked under a dress wasn't exactly a novelty nowadays, after all. I wondered about putting my hair up, and decided against it, brushing it out until it shone. I had got used to wearing heels, on the catwalk, so slipped on a pair of stiletto-heeled slingbacks.