Soap

Well I figured my mouth would get me in trouble sometime. The words that Master doesn't like slip in and out of my speech at time. I don't use them badly I guess in my mind it doesn't always sound bad. I never use the big swears. I think that my mind is trained to use only the ones that wouldn't get me kicked out of class in high school. We could get away with 'hell', 'damn' and 'shit'. I think it was because of where I grew up. Everyone was really laid back including the teachers.

So anyway, the soap. At the time I only had caress soap in the house. Very nice to wash with really bad to have to put in my mouth. I went in and sat down on the toilet in the bathroom. Looking at the soap. I remembered back when I was little and my step dad did this to me or my mom did. 'Soap in two minutes, then out.' I could see the clock on the night stand. As soon as the number turned over I opened my mouth and put the soap in.

I instantly started blinking my eyes because the soap is just gross and nasty. I pretty much decided that I never would buy the soap again. Having such a small mouth and that was a new bar of soap, there was really no where for my tongue to go but directly onto the bar of soap. I started counting off the seconds in my head. I was mad at myself because I looked to stupid with the bar of soap sticking out of my mouth.

I hated it. I hated that He made me do it and I hated feeling stupid and worthless. I run into a problem with punishments. They slam full force into the past. I pushed the thoughts of the stupid reasons and excuses that were used when I was little to make me have to do some humiliating punishment.

Looking at the clock I realized that only a minute had gone by at this point. I wanted to scream but obviously couldn't because the soap was in my mouth. I noticed too that I was crying. Stupid girl, keep your mouth shut and in check and you won't have to sit here stupidly with a bar of soap in your mouth. Burning your mouth, throat and making your stomach hurt.

I vowed then that I would not use language that would get this treatment again. Especially if I had to do it in front of Him or others. I was humiliated enough. And I knew that I would retreat into my shell if he made me to it in front of Him or others. Then I would get in trouble for that. I couldn't 'win'.

Finally the time went away. Getting the soap in was one thing. Pulling it back out meant that I had to scrap it against my teeth. I finally managed to get it all out and promptly proceeded to throw up in the toilet. Great, soap and vomit in my mouth. Moving over to the sink I proceeded to clean out my mouth. I rinsed it out with water, realizing that activated the soap inside. I held my nose to desensitize my tongue. I grabbed my toothbrush, wanting both tastes out of my mouth immediately. I brushed my teeth three times trying to get the soap out.

I knew from the past that there was just no way to get it all out. I sighed at that point and stopped brushing my teeth and used some mouthwash. I went and got some tea. I sat down drinking it and writing this essay, still vividly tasting the soap that just doesn't go away.

Master I will try to be a good girl in the future and not use words that will make you angry. I know that you don’t want me to swear because it’s not lady like. I will try really hard not to disappoint you in the future. I will try to be a good slave. I understand that you discipline me to make me a better slave and even though I really hate the punishments I am glad that you take the time to do them so that I will be a more pleasing girl to you.

Master a slave thanks you for taking the time to punish me, a slave will be more pleasing in the future.