"Seeking Smart, Sexy & Sometimes Submissive"
Do you think a tattoo can be a sign from the gods? A while back I saw a CL ad entitled "Seeking Smart, Sexy & Sometimes Submissive".
I like chatty ads; this wasn't that but he struck a few right notes and the title - hey! that's me. I was having a hard time coordinating the DP I was after. Kevin, the sexy Canadian attorney, said 'yes' but never followed through. I booked (and cancelled) a babysitter 5 times for him. Every time we were supposed to be in a hotel room - fucking -, he was actually in an airplane headed off to calm some nervous client or other. Then there was the farm team - Dennis and Willi. Willi was satisfactorily filthy minded and edgy looking to keep my interest. Dennis? Not so much. Especially after he wanted me to call him 'dirty boy'. Ugh. But once again, industrious Willi, who managed some swanky restaurant on the peninsula, was never available. I was beginning to feel ancy, wanting something - anything - to happen.
So now there was "Napa Guy". He made it clear he did not 'hot chat', as he put it. Too many flakes in the D/s scene. Women who liked to talk the talk but not walk the walk. He was a philosophy major (oh no - loser?) so I asked about his favorite philosopher. Answer: Thomas Aquinas. I reared a little at my computer. Medieval theologian = failed seminarian/kinky (ex-)priest? He's pleasantly surprised I recognize the name. I poke around a bit more in his past. What does a philosopher do for a living in Yountville? Turns out he got to Yountville via a detour through Yale Law. Now I'm pleasantly surprised, even more so when he sends a pic of his tattoo with the quote from the Angelic Doctor. Ladies and Gentlemen, we have a winner!
We agree to meet for brunch - 10:30 the following Friday at the Boon Fly Cafe. He asked how he'll recognize me. I tell him - tell me what to wear, then you'll know. Muted dress, preferably burgundy. No clunky shoes. I have just the thing.
I know where the Boon Fly is - on Carenos Hwy. attached to a very expensive hotel. I'm late but when he sees my shoes I can tell he doesn't mind. He's younger than his picture made him look, handsome, and very nervous. I like that because I am, too. I've never interviewed to be someone's sub before, don't have any clue how it's done. He asks a lot of questions about my sexual history. When did I know I was submissive? (Who knows? Who cares?) Did I have any experience with this sort of thing? My mouth is dry despite the manhattan I'm drinking well before noon. That depends on what 'this sort of thing' is. His eyes twinkle. It's clear he's not going to the let the cat out of the bag though he may let me see the tail.
We discuss limits. No marks, I say, I can't explain that . He chuckles and swears he's not going to whip me. What he likes is sensation play. I shiver a little. That sounds like it's right up my alley (if only my alley weren't so dark - I have no idea where it leads, having only been down it part of the way). Surprisingly, I find myself telling him all sorts of things I've never told anyone before: that I tied my barbies up, that I have rape fantasies my better feminist self despises. None of this seems to faze him. We have this weird conversation right in front of the bartender and I think we look nothing like some master and his prospective slave girl. We look like very successful white people trying to organize a hookup.
Which is true. To a point.
When he kisses me up against my car (he's here on a harley), he puts his hand on my neck, ever so gently, but I know what it means and my brain and my cunt sizzle.
He books a hotel room for the following Friday. This is all going very fast but I need it to or I'll chicken out. I drive out to Napa shaking in my flats. I have sinfully high heels in a bag. Or at least, I think I do. As it turns out, I've only brought one so I'll have to face him in flats.
This 'failure' makes me even more nervous, a feature he does not help when he instructs me to wait in the lobby for 'further instructions'. The Marriot is full of old folks and I am certain every old lady who eyes me knows for a fact I am only there to get laid. My blush is furious. Thank god he finally texts I am to get a bottle opener and champagne flutes (???? - I am not allowed to ask questions) and proceed to room 1027. And keep my eyes down. Oh, and call him sir.
I can do this. I can do this, though I almost giggle as I stand there staring at my little ballet flats. The room is so dark I couldn't see him even if he let me look. His voice is so much lower that - for a minute - I fear he's given me to a stranger. Well, even so, now I'm here and there's no going back. He blindfolds me almost immediately, making it very difficult to pour the champagne he opens after I fumble with it, trying so hard not to cheat that I can't manage. Before handing him the flute, I stretch out a hand to find his general area in the pitch blankness.