The fire is warm, cheery and comforting as we sit, talk and eat. I had prepared a light meal of fruits, vegetables and cheese before the trip. Fortunately I had a cooler backpack that I made sure I carried so she would not notice the weight. I present some wine and glasses, that were stowed in the tent, to her now unbelieving eyes.
"You really did think of everything didn't you?" See says with a smile as she reaches for her glass.
"Not everything, but I try to always look forward and anticipate what is needed, and act upon it now, as oppose to react later. For me it helps me not feel anxious about the things I cannot control."
I raise my glass towards her. "A toast. A toast to adventure and the unknown. May we learn and accept the lessons we are taught with grace and wonderment." The clink of the glasses are the only sounds in the night other than the crackle of the fire.
I recline on my side with my back to the fire. I feel the heat pull on me, removing all stress and the worries of life. The unwanted tension that I did not realize I had. I feel them melt out of me, slide from my back and bury themselves into the sandy soil.
She pokes a stick in the fire and lets the end catch. As she pulls it out she brings it up to her face and looks at the flame. "It really is a beautiful thing, fire. She waves it back and forth slowly in front of her face and follows it with her eyes. "It is as if the flame follows the stick when I move it. But, it is actually eating away at the stick.
In order for it to survive it has to destroy its host, the very thing it needs to survive. It is almost like one of the lonesome gods. But, instead of wanting to get attention to be worshiped, it punishes because it is needed and is worshiped. It is like those gods because it wants attention. Fire wants all of the attention. It even wants to take the attention that the other gods may get and claims it for itself. It consumes all it touches." She puts the stick all of the way into the fire and sits there and watches the fire inside the circle of rocks.
I watch the firelight dance off of her face, her hair. The softness that the firelight casts on the front of her body is in stark contrast to the deep darkness that has creeped up on her back side. Laying there I feel like I am watching a fight over her, the fire attempting to pull her towards its light and consume her, the darkness ebbing and flowing from the light trying to slowly lure her away into a dark chasm of emptiness.
I decide to start my game. Not really a game per se but the opportunity for her to either accept the punishment for her actions or the denial that she should be punished.
I need to make sure that she is totally night blind, so I say, "Have you ever heard firefighters talk about dancing with the devil?" She turns her face towards me slightly and shakes her head no.
"They say that if you look closely at any fire you will see a skull or a face in the flames. There are a lot of pictures that people have taken where you can clearly see the images in the fire. They rarely see it in person, mostly in the pictures. But there are times they can see them live. Almost like it is a lonesome god that is wanting to be seen. I bet this fire even has one."
I watch her turn her face to the fire once again. She looks deeply into the flames, expecting to see a skull or face look back at her, beckoning her to come to it, to get lost in its all consuming desire to be worshiped.
By this time I know my eyes have grown accustomed to the dark. I can see rock formations and slight details as I scan the night.
I get up and grab the flashlight, "Come with me for a little adventure?" I ask innocently while holding out my hand.
"Ok. What kind of adventure? It is pitch black out there and we have no idea where we are!" She says as she reaches for my hand.
I hold her hand and quickly go to the trail we were on to reach our camp. We reach the trail and I lead her to the part of the trail we had not walked. I keep a brisk pace and begin to weave between boulders and other maze like areas. I am holding the flashlight down in front of her so she can see where she is stepping.
"Where are we going? What kind of adventure are we going on?" She says with a slight tremble to her voice. "I have no idea where we are, have you been here before?"
I continue to lead her with a few words of, "This way." or "Come on, I believe we are getting closer."
While on the path, I made sure I took many turns to make sure she would not be able to find her way back to camp. I have doubled back on the trail and have brought her to the area that had the many crevasses that I said could be a hiding place for one of the lonesome gods. Once we passed a certain area that had a very deep and dark area I say, "What is that!" I shut off the flashlight, drop it and run away around the bend of a boulder.
I hear her footsteps as she attempts to follow me. "Wait!! Where are you going? HEY!!"
I knew that the area circled around and I was able to navigate myself very well due to not looking in the fire. I quietly enter the recess by where I dropped the flashlight and wait.
I know she will return to the flashlight. She will be able to locate it easily because I dropped it directly into the middle of the path. I stand in silence. Slow my breathing. Close my eyes and listen to the sounds of the living desert so I can allow myself to dig into myself. I become the silence I desired. Deep and quiet breaths, inaudible to the human ear. My mind making the final adjustments to complete my transformation into the primal hunter. Ready to take my prey.
I hear her footsteps as she emerges from around the corner of the boulder. I can feel the apprehension of each step she makes towards the unknown. I taste the fear that has started to form in her and relish the feast I will have when she is caught. My eyes are sharp, focused and alert to every movement out of my dark den.
"Oh no, oh no." I hear her mutter as she gets closer. "I know he dropped the flashlight. oh nooo."
I see her shadow before she reaches the flashlight. My legs tense, ready for the pounce. Arms relaxed at my sides but flexed in a way to make sure my prey will not escape. I inhale for a slow five seconds and begin a twenty second exhale.
Total control.
I hear her make a slight exclamation at the discovery and see her bend over to pick it up.
I pounce with a guttural growl. Grabbing her from behind, my arms wrap around her with the tightness of a straight jacket. Her scream shatters the solitude of the night as I lift her off of the ground. She begins to kick her legs along with screaming even louder. I lower her down just enough as to force her legs out in front of her. I begin to drag her backwards towards the rock where we watched the sunset.
I put my head next to her ear, forcing her head to tilt and in a low and demanding voice say, "Stop screaming, NOW!"
