"Rick?"
I looked up to see Loren at the base of the driveway. It was hot for 10:00 AM and I'd been concentrating on pulling up elm seedlings. My shirt was off - I'm no great looker at 42, but I still have a few good years left in me. Anyway, I was a little self-conscious.
"Hi Loren. Wassup?" She looked a little distracted, maybe even anxious. It was hard to tell sometimes. I looked around for my shirt, wiping the dirt from my hands on my shorts.
"I'm good, thanks..." She said slowly, and continued. "Uhhh, I was wondering...did you cut a branch off my tree?" She was motioning to the huge maple that sat at our property line, its massive limbs arching almost to the middle of my yard. I loved that tree, but it sometimes drooped branches onto my driveway.
"Oh...yeah. I took a few small branches down that were blocking my driveway. I hope you don't mind...I used the rule of thumb." I smiled at the reference, hoping it would break what appeared to be some tension she might be feeling.
She looked completely blank, her eyes searching mine for some kind of meaning. She wasn't angry, just...confused.
"Rule of thumb? No?" I figured everyone knew about it. "It was the old English rule that a husband could select a branch no bigger around than his thumb to beat his wife with...Never heard that?" I stopped. She had blushed so deeply, and her face tilted down to the ground that I was worried I had offended her.
I had known Loren and Bill ever since they had moved in next door - about six years...no it was five years before Marnie's death, so, seven years I'd known them. I never got to know them very well, just occasional barbeques and dinners, and then since Marnie died, not a lot of contact, at least before the divorce. Loren was always so bright and interesting, Bill taciturn and typically Midwest male. I never could figure out how they ever got together.
The divorce was messy. I watched as their marriage deteriorated and then the subsequent several months, just this year, as she tried to put her life back together. Thankfully no kids, but it was obvious she had depended on him a lot. She had come over to the house a few times asking for help and I'd shared a beer or glass of wine. She didn't talk much about the break-up and I didn't talk much about Marnie, but it was fine to have some quiet companionship.
I never really had much in common with Bill. I remember only once that he actually extended an invitation to join him in a beer. Loren was out of town and I was surprised. As we sat on his front porch that summer evening, insects buzzing, he didn't say much, but then, out of nowhere, he confessed that he wasn't very happy in his marriage.
"I'm not sure why we ever got married," he said. "But after we did, I was okay with it; until I found out she was a pervert."
I looked up in surprise - as much at his sudden vulnerability as his revelation of her sexuality. I raised an eyebrow, hoping he'd go on, but he never said another word. That was August and they got divorced the following February.
Here it was June and I was staring at her blushing and looking at her feet. What had I been saying? Oh yeah, rule of thumb...
"Seriously, they were pretty small, diameter-wise, and they were blocking the driveway. C'mon up here and take a look." I waved her up the driveway to the compost pile, forgetting about my shirt. Still pink from the blush, she made eye-contact with me briefly, as if asking if I knew why she was so embarrassed. I didn't acknowledge anything out of the ordinary but continued making my way 'round back to the mound.
"You see," I said, pointing to the mass of branches I hadn't yet chopped. "Go ahead and take a closer look."
I stepped aside to let her pass. The side yard was a little tight, with my roses and raspberries, so she had to slip by me. I got a whiff of her fresh soap smell, and I realized I must have smelled like a wild boar.
I had never noticed her body in detail - outside the usual inspection and judgment: she was relatively tall with a small frame, well proportioned, everything within my taste for "cute." Today, her halter top and shorts revealed a bare mid-riff, a guaranteed trigger to start me thinking. Her odd behavior moments ago, and now her passing so close to me, triggered something else - a feeling I hadn't had for a long long time. Even before Marnie's illness started. Her face was small featured, a sprinkling of freckles making a light mask across her nose. The fading blush accentuated them slightly. Cute.
Loren looked over the pile, reaching down to touch one or two of the branches. I watched as her slender fingers lightly stroked the bark, and then curled around a branch. She struggled for a moment, separating it from the rest, and then dragged it towards me.
"This one," she said quietly, again not looking at me directly. "Would this one fit the bill?"
It was my turn to look confused. I looked down at the branch, and back to her, standing with her arms to her sides, her face downturned.
"Excuse me?"
She looked up, looked down at the branch, and dropped it, as if it burned. "Oh god, I'm sorry!" She started walking away, but I stopped her, my hand on her upper arm.
"What's going on Loren? Is there something the matter? Can I help?" My fingers on her skin, her distress and the heat of the day jolted that long-forgotten feeling up a few notches.
She looked up at me, tears in her eyes. "I...nothing. There's nothing going on. I'm just so damn confused. Th...thanks for helping me with the branches. It looked so much more open and I would have thought they would be much bigger."
That old familiar feeling wasn't the only thing rising. I knew if we stood this way much longer she'd see a lump in my shorts. I dropped my hands, letting my fingers slide across her skin in what I hoped was a comforting gesture; my libido had suddenly taken over: in my mind's eye I was tearing her clothes off and making love to her on the grass.
I stepped aside to let her go, and she thanked me again. I assured her that it was always okay for her to come by, and if there was anything I could to help her through this tough spot, blah blah blah. I frankly couldn't hear anything I was saying by then, wishing she wouldn't look down at the growing bulge between my legs.
I returned to my gardening, puzzled by what had just happened, and excited that my sex drive hadn't been buried with my wife.
*-*-*-*
A week later, another Saturday, another unusually warm spring day, and I was once again getting my plantings together. I was humming a tune, digging and puttering around, when I got the feeling I wasn't alone. I looked up and saw Loren standing just a few feet from me. Her face was a mixture of emotions: fear, near panic, anxiety...
"Loren! You scared the shit out of me! Is everything okay?" I dropped my tools and walked towards her, hoping to give her a hug or something to calm her down.
She swallowed, her breath kind of ragged, like she'd been running.
"I've done something...bad." She squeaked.
"Bad? What do you mean 'bad'?" I imagined killing a cat (not mine, we stopped having pets a while ago), or worse, hitting a child with her car. I looked up past my driveway to her house but couldn't see anything amiss from where I was standing.
"I...I was out trimming my garden, and I think I might have cut down some of your roses." It all came out as one sentence, followed by a cascade of tears. Her hand leapt to her mouth and she looked at me with terror in her eyes.
"Whaaat?" I raced to the common side of our yards to see what damage she had done-imagining my hard work of 10 years destroyed. When I got there, I stopped short. All of the plants seemed to be just fine - there wasn't anything missing that I could tell. "Loren?! What do you think you did?" I shouted back to her.
She walked over slowly, like a dog expecting a beating, and slowly pointed to the far corner of the planting where two long vines from the clinging variety lay on her sidewalk. We walked over there together, and I was relieved to see that they were inconsequential.
"This isn't a problem, Loren. You gave me a real start there."
"When I'm bad," she said quietly, her face to the ground, "I think of myself as Elke. Bill never understood," she continued, "but I really don't like to be bad. When I was younger I used to be punished for my misbehavior. But Bill never understood." She stood, bowed head, hands clenching and unclenching. I kind of remembered she had turned 28 the past year, but standing there like that, she looked almost 20 years younger.
I shook my head trying to clear it. Several things all started happening at once. For starters, I was pretty sure she was bonkers. I'm no shrink, and I'd never seen anything weird the entire time I'd known her, but this behavior was pretty fucking over the top.
Elke?
What the hell was that all about? Best I could figure...absolute tops...was she was having a nervous breakdown over the divorce and just couldn't cope.
Shrink or no shrink, I knew when someone needed a hug. I wrapped my arms around her and gave her as much comfort as I could, thinking back to Bill's disclosure about her being a pervert. Touching her again, and feeling her sobbing into my shoulders started that chain reaction in my groin. I felt my cock pulse. With just my shorts between us, I really didn't want to embarrass myself; especially if I was truly being sincere in offering comfort. Besides, how low is it taking advantage of the mentally disturbed?
"Elke, eh?"
She nodded.
I stepped back, holding her at arm's length and looked at her, to make sure I understood. "When you were younger, your parents punished you for being bad? That doesn't sound too unusual. Did they beat you?"
She nodded, tears dropping from her cheeks to the grass.