Retraining

It was Jack's grocery shopping day. He always went shopping once a week. Saturday mornings was what he was used to when his wife was alive. He could count on two hands the number of times he and his wife had not shopped together through 30 years of marriage. It was more of a social event than a chore. Now it was a chore. Jack was in a different city now. Socializing was a little more difficult when you didn't know anyone. At least one of the advantages was that he got his shopping done quickly. There wasn't anyone he knew to stop and talk with. And he was shopping for one. Shopping for one might be easy, but cooking for one was a little more difficult.

As Jack approached a checkout lane, the monotone voice of the young girl behind the register was asking him if he had found everything. The girl might just as well have been asking him if he wanted a blow job. There was no life or personality in her voice. Jack was barely listening. As Jack paid for his groceries, he noticed a woman leaving her checkout lane. She was attractive, but not gorgeous. Her figure was what he liked in a woman. She was short and petite. But she had great looking legs and a perfect ass underneath her shorts. Her breasts were perfect size.

But there was no smile. God! Did anyone smile in this place? Jack was convinced that she would have been beautiful if she would smile. But she seemed almost withdrawn. Oh well, Jack thought. "I'm not looking for anyone anyway. It still hurts."

As Jack wheeled his cart out to his car, he saw the woman again. "Late 30's, I bet," he said to himself. He opened the trunk and started to load his groceries in when some movement caught his attention. He looked and realized that the woman's cart had gotten away from her. It was a little windy and there was a slight slope to the parking lot away from the building. The woman had not noticed it yet as she was trying to slide some things in her trunk out of the way to make room for her grocery bags. And then he realized the cart was picking up a little speed and heading towards another car. He was closer to the cart than she was. He took a couple of quick steps towards it when she cried out, noticing that it was going to hit a car. Jack caught it just in time. She ran up as he was turning the cart towards her car.

"Oh my god! Thank you! That would have made a terrible dent or scratch to that car."

Jack smiled. "No problem and no harm done. You'd think the developer who built this place would not have created a parking lot with so much slope." He walked back to her car with her, still pushing the cart.

She smiled at Jack and said, "Well thank you anyway. My husband would have been very upset at having to report this to my insurance company."

Jack had been right. She was beautiful when she smiled. "I'm sure he would have understood that this would have simply been an accident."

She didn't respond to that and Jack noticed a look in her eyes that he couldn't identify. Instead, she said, "My name is Kelli. I wish I could buy you a cup of coffee or something to show my appreciation. But I have to be home soon."

"My name is Jack. It's nice to meet you Kelli. And it's really not necessary, but thank you for the offer." Jack turned toward his car and then stopped to look back at her. "But if you insist, I always shop on Saturday mornings."

"So do I," she smiled. "So we'll probably see each other again."

Jack smiled. "Bye Kelli."

As Jack got into his car after putting his groceries away, he shook his head and said out loud, "She's married you idiot."

*****

"Harder! Oh god, please, harder!"

She was on her hands and knees. Her wrists, knees, and ankles were all bound to bolted hooks in the floor. Jack was slamming into her tight pussy over and over. They were both breathing heavy, both sweating. He couldn't stop moaning. She was squeezing his cock with every thrust. He reached forward and grabbed a handful of her hair. He pulled her head back and cried out, "Don't cum until I tell you, slut!"

She barely managed to get the words out. "Yes, Master. Fuck me, Master!"

He released her hair. With both hands, he gripped her hips and pounded her cunt. He was losing control. She turned to look back at him, a wicked grin on her face. She kept squeezing his cock. "My Master loves it when I squeeze his cock like that, don't you?"

Jack smiled back at her, but then his expression changed as he moaned loudly. He was losing it. His balls were tingling, his cock was expanding .... and then he woke up.

"God damn it!"

Jack's cock was throbbing. He got up out of bed and walked into the bathroom. It was always the same. He would dream that he was fucking his wife, Sandy. But he always woke up before cumming. At first, he tried to masturbate to a climax. But it was too hard for him. Tears were already filling his eyes, just as before. He missed her badly.

Sandy had been Jack's wife for almost 30 years. Sandy had also been his submissive slave. It had not always been that way. Jack has always been dominant sexually and Sandy loved that in him. But after about 20 years of marriage, Sandy looked for something to spice up their sex lives. It had started with a little bondage. But before long, they both got interested in BDSM. Jack built a dungeon in their home. He made attempts to sound proof the room, but he was sure that their neighbors could hear Sandy occasionally.

And then Jack and Sandy's sons discovered the dungeon. They were both in college and old enough to understand what might be going on in that room. The older boy, Jim, simply closed his eyes and said, "I don't want to know." But the younger son, Jason, smiled and said, "Alright Dad!"

Jack and Sandy fell in love all over again. She was the perfect submissive. He was the perfect Master. They enjoyed every moment together, whether it was sexually or not. She loved serving and pleasing him. He loved taking care of her and acting as her protector. They started to seek out other couples in the life style and found an entire culture in their city that they had never known about. They made new friends and attended parties. But Jack would never share Sandy with anyone. And she certainly had a number of men show interest in her. Sandy was Jack's and Jack's alone. And they both wanted it that way.

And then three years ago, Sandy was diagnosed with cancer. At first, they stayed very positive. She seemed to be beating it. But it always seemed to pop up somewhere else. And then 9 months ago, it appeared again and it had spread quickly and frightfully. Sandy was in so much pain that sex was out of the question. That bothered her more than anything else. She had even suggested that Jack go out and try to find someone to fulfill his needs. But Jack would have none of that. He was with her every hour until the end. She finally died peacefully a month later.

Jack could not live in the house after that. In fact, he never slept in it after Sandy died. He sold everything. He dismantled the dungeon so that he could sell it. With the housing market, he took quite a loss, but he didn't care. Since he worked from home as a software engineer, it didn't matter where he lived. So he moved to a city that was closer to where Jim and Jason were going to school. He found a small two bedroom apartment and settled in. He figured the apartment would be temporary until he found something he could afford to purchase.

Jack looked at himself in the mirror. These dreams were torture. He wanted to move on. He knew that Sandy's death would not be something he could get over. He knew it was something he had to accept and adjust to. It was so hard for him. He wondered again, as he often did, should he see a psychiatrist. And then he chuckled with wet cheeks. "Yes, Doctor. I was whipping her with a crop before I fucked her. And then I woke up before either of us climaxed." Yeah, that would be real easy to discuss with someone who didn't understand the life style.

After washing his face, Jack seemed to be settled down and went back to bed. He fell asleep without further incident until morning.

*****

Jack was at the grocery store shopping on Saturday morning again. He found himself thinking about Kelli, but put it out of his mind. "She probably does not remember me," he thought. "And why do you keep thinking about this married woman." Jack was still day dreaming when he accidently bumped his cart into another cart at the end of the aisle. He looked up and saw Kelli smiling at him.

"Good morning, Jack," she said.

"Good morning, Kelli," he responded.

"Will you let me buy you that cup of coffee?" Kelli asked.

Jack smiled and said, "Yes. I'd love to have a cup of coffee."

The pushed their carts to the deli area where there were some tables for dining. Jack sat down at a table and Kelli asked, "Black, cream, sugar?"

"Black, please."

"Ok, I'll be right back," said Kelli.

Kelli returned with two cups of coffee before long and sat down with Jack. "I shop here a lot," she said. "I love the coffee here. Sometimes, I'll come in a little early and have breakfast." And then she paused and looked at Jack. "I don't think I've seen you hear before last week. Did you just move here or did you used to shop elsewhere?"

"Yes to both questions, "said Jack. "I recently moved here to be closer to my sons. They both go to college here."

Kelli looked at the wedding back on Jack's ring finger. "That must be wonderful for you and your wife."

Jack stared into his cup of coffee. "My wife passed away eight months ago. I guess part of the reason of moving here was to escape." He looked up at Kelli and tried to smile. "It's not working too well."

Kelli placed her hand on his. "I am so sorry Jack. I can see you are in pain and still grieving."

Kelli's touch seemed to make Jack's body tingle. But he managed to say, "Thank you. I'll eventually learn to get past this." And then Jack saw Kelli's wedding ring and pulled his had away abruptly. "I'm sorry, Kelli. You don't need me dumping this on you. I should get on with my shopping. I'll see you later."

Kelli sat there, a perplexed look on her face. She really didn't understand what had just happened. And then she realized that Jack was looking at her hand, her ring finger actually. She shook her head sadly and got up to do her own shopping.

She never ran into Jack while shopping, which was very strange. Had he left?

*****

Jack had left his cart and walked out of the store. "What the hell am I doing? I can't get involved with a married woman. It was only coffee, but where does it go next? It can only mean pain in the long run and I have enough of that to go around.

Jack got in his car and drove off, thinking that he had to find another grocery store to do his shopping.