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Chapter 18

On Thursday morning, Helena's gardener saw a car he didn't know pull into the car park. Visitors usually parked in the circle at the front door. The car drove back to park beside Rob's old Volvo instead of nearer the house. It prompted him to wonder when he'd last seen Rob, who'd been away been some days.

Then a familiar figure got out of the car. Rob greeted him, "Morris, how are you?" They chatted briefly, Rob knew the dog walking fell to Morris when he was away. They both liked a good wander out through the wood on the back half of Helena's property, the dogs gave them an excuse to do it.

Rob turned and went in through the kitchen door. There was no one in the kitchen, so he walked through to the living room, where he found Marion and Helena, each with the newspaper on their laps and coffee on the table beside their chairs. Rob swept in, took Helen by the hand and led her into her library, firmly closing the door behind them. Once the door was closed, he enveloped Helena in an embrace and kissed her.

He took her hands then said words she dreaded. "We need to talk."

"Is this about your time with Michelle?"

"Yes."

"Then let me ask Marion to join us."

His hand held her back. "Helena, I came here with one purpose, to talk, privately, with my fiancee. Will you do this with me? After you and I have talked it out, then I might talk with Marion."

There was a fire burning in the fireplace to ward off the chill of the morning. They sat in chairs by the fire.

"Is this about the night she tried to get you into sub-space?"

"Slow down, Helena, let me tell you the whole story. You must understand the context of everything that's happened." He started with the day of his arrival, going through each session with Michelle in turn. He got to the attempt at sub-space, describing his fainting, his anger and how he recovered.

Helena shook her hear. "Oh, I just knew it was a bad idea."

He stopped telling his story to learn more about her reaction. "What makes you say that?"

"Michelle and Marion were talking, this was back a few weeks ago as we talked about how to structure a week with Michelle that you could handle. Marion said she'd had you in sub-space. I don't like to question her, she has so much experienced than I, from her years with John. But I must say, I've never seen anything except the Rob who is looking around, paying attention."

"Interesting. Don't let the thought get away. The attempt at sub-space was Tuesday night. Wednesday morning, Michelle called here, she wanted to talk with you about her ideas for changing the shape of my training, but you weren't available. Apparently she talked with Marion instead."

"What? I was here all day Wednesday. I was available!" She stopped to think. "I remember Marion was on the phone for a long time, in the late morning. Over lunch I asked her about the call, she said Michelle was checking in, they discussed a few details." She frowned. "I wish I'd known the sub-space thing hadn't worked out, why did she wait to tell me until Wednesday night if she knew hours earlier?"

"Michelle tried her best. She clearly is one of the best. If she can't then apparently I'm not going to get there."

"Yes, she's well known as the one who takes excellent care of the people who would take no interest whatever in a BDSM club. That's why it's surprising she was elected head mistress, she actually doesn't like the club events herself."

Rob thought it odd an inexperienced mistress like Helena know so much about the politics of the BDSM community. Saying nothing, he stored the observation in his mind beside a few other tidbits of similar nature.

"So, last night, Michelle did a series of things Marion suggested. Care to guess what they were?"

"Oh, I've no idea."

"Marion told her to try pissing on me, pissing directly into my mouth to be exact. Also, hot wax play and offering to pierce my nipples. The good news is, hot wax play isn't an issue, within reason. Marion also advised locking me in the little cage in the dungeon to spend the night, but Michelle had better sense."

He paused to let her think through the bad news.

"No, she wouldn't want you pierced, it was settled months ago. You could have just walked away."

"I was bound, quite securely, I couldn't even move my head. I was gagged or I'd have said the unkind things I was thinking about Michelle."

"Oh, I'll bet you did anyway, you and your temper."

"Actually, we had quite a civil conversation after."

"Seems you've learned something from her."

"I don't blame her for any of this, even though she'd read our agreement. She was following advice she got from this house."

He took a copy of his agreement from his jacket pocket and led her through the consequences of the mistakes made.

"Ten months, doesn't it seem extreme? Are you going to do that to us?"

"I'm going to take a few days to get some advice and to think on it. I don't want to, but a long separation may be necessary to force us to a different relationship. Helena, I'm sorry, but if we continue as we are now, I don't foresee our relationship last much longer."

"I hate that damned agreement! I wish I'd never signed it!"

Softly, Rob reminder her of the alternative. "If you hadn't signed it, we'd already be separated.

"Look, Helena, I want to tell you the primary reason for my doubts about our relationship is - you. When you want me to get more experience, you send me to another mistress. You weren't even the person to tell me you were sending me to another mistress. When you want to ask me about giving another woman a child, you had another person ask the question."

"Rob, let me tell you who - "

"No!" Rob held up his hand to cut her off. "Not relevant. Who wants this from you makes no difference to me. My point is I do not see you, Helena, I don't see YOU working on our relationship. I've said this before, I see you delegating someone else to address central issues about you and me. This isn't one of your corporations, where you can have your people do things. This is to be your marriage, I'm to be your husband. You must do it for yourself.

"I must raise again a question you're heard me ask in the past: do you have plans for me? Do you have a picture in your mind of what I'll be to you in one year, in three years? No, don't answer now, think for a few days about the secrets you should be finally telling me. When I'm back, next week, if you want our relationship to continue, I expect you to tell me everything you haven't told me, absolutely everything."

When they finished talking, an hour and a half had passed. After more kisses Rob left Helena in her library to think on the challenge before her. At least he wasn't simply running off, he had come to talk it over with her first. At least she had no reason to worry about whether she'd see him again. He promised her he'd call no later than Monday to check in with her.

He closed the doors to Helena's sanctum behind him and headed up to his room. As soon as he reached the top of the stair, Marion appeared before him. She slapped his face, scolding him. "A very disrespectful thing to do to your mistress, taking Helen away like that! I insist you come to the dungeon with me right now, for your punishment."

Calmly, Rob said, "I do not consent to a session with you today, indeed, not any day in the foreseeable future, Marion. I was here to tell Helena the awful consequences of decisions you made."

She tried to slap him again, but he easily caught her wrist, gripping it firmly. He held up one finger, right in front of her eyes. "Bad dog!" He said, punctuating each word with a tap if his finger on her nose. "Bad, bad dog!" This was exactly how he'd dealt with Nikki or Inca when they were puppies. He was at least able to stop himself from calling her a bitch instead of a dog.

"How dare you!"

It was a perfect time for Marion's private conversation. Keeping her hand firmly in his, Rob led her to the farthest guest room down the long hallway, closing the door behind them. He pulled a chair into the middle of the floor and sat her in it. He stood close to her, looming over her with hands on hips.

"Well, what did you find so awful this time, instead of taking your training and learning from it?' She was putting up a bold front.

"I see no reason to tell you the whole story. You already know exactly what you did wrong. Did you really think something good would come of my sleeping in a cage all night?"

Her eyes lit up. "Oh, she did that?"

"That's as good as a confession, Marion, thank you for confirming. No, I didn't spend the night in her cage, Michelle isn't so stupid. But, innocent and thinking she'd gotten good advice, Michelle attempted to piss in my mouth."

"As is her right as mistress."

"Bollocks!"

She started to stand, his hand on her shoulder put her in the chair. "There is more, as I am sure you know. She ended the evening by piercing my nipples."

"Let me see!"

"You have no right to ask that!" He was not working on staying calm, he wanted Marion to feel his anger. "Listen to me, your foolish advice to Michelle, according to my agreement with Helena, will now cost Helena a ten month separation."

"I never took that seriously, why should I now?"

"You signed it. Ask Michelle, she's a solicitor. Ask her if you can sign an agreement you're already planning on ignoring. In a business contract, it would be called fraud. Helena takes the agreement seriously, the fact you don't means you're undermining her, right here in her own house."

"Nonsense! You couldn't possible stay away from us for ten months, you need us."

"Marion, in addition to the agreement, you're a fraud of a mistress. There is a damned good reason I avoid a session with you at all costs. You and I will never be together in any playroom, anywhere, at any time, not ever."

"It comes down to this. I'm telling you this privately, I will tell no one else. I'll not come back here to live with Helena, if you're here. It's up to you, you can stay, I'm sure you'll be welcome for some time. But I won't come back to Helena if you stay. I'll give her my own reasons, she'll not hear from me it's you keeping me away. But only if you're gone will I come back to Helena. You hold Helena's happiness in your hand. You decide Helena's fate, no one else."

"I'll tell Helena you're forcing me to do this."

He tilted his head. "I suppose I won't mind you telling Helena."

"Pff, bold talk coming from a submissive."

Rob leaned down over her, close to her face, looking her in the eye. Marion saw nothing to suggest he was the least bit submissive, quite the opposite. "Hear this, Marion: I am not a bloody submissive!" Again, the finger tapped her nose to punctuate each of the final few words. He stepped back, looked at her coolly. "I'm done with you. You're free to go." He went to the door.

"Yes and you'd like it, wouldn't you? You'd like me to go!"

Hand on the doorknob, he turned back and spoke calmly. "Yes, Marion, I would like you to go."

He left her sitting in the chair.

In his room, it didn't take him long to pack everything to be away for a few weeks. He took mostly men's clothing, little of his crossdressing wardrobe. He collected his dogs and soon was driving away in his new car.

Chapter 19

A few hours later, Rob parked on the street in front of Cathy's house in Winslow. He had a sudden memory of getting out of his car and being kidnapped. It seemed like a lifetime ago. After talking with Helen and Marion, he'd called Cathy to make an appointment. He needed advice, especially from Cathy and Iris.

She had a patient in her office. Rob sat in her little waiting area, reading the Financial Times. He made a point of not looking up when she saw her patient out, giving them the last of their time together without intruding.

Suddenly his newspaper was swept from his hands, scattering on the floor. Cathy dropped into his lap, arms around his neck. Their kisses went on for some time.

Finally she paused. "You came at just the right time for me. I am so tired of keeping a professional demeanor."

Rob pulled her close for another kiss.

"So," Cathy said, rising and pulling him to his feet. "What's the issue with your training from Michelle?" She took him to her private living room, instead of her professional office.

"No issues with Michelle at all, she's excellent."

"Hm! Then you didn't flee from the training in anger?"

"No, we parted good friends, better friends than the day I started. Cathy, she is such a good mistress. Michelle and you, you're the ones who are insightful, keep me from blowing up. Look, I did leave because of anger, just not with Michelle. Let me start from the beginning."

Rob recited the story of his time with Michelle, from Saturday afternoon to Wednesday night. He described his talk with Helena. He told her he confronted Marion and got confirmation she intended the bad advice she gave. He said nothing of the ultimatum he'd given her.

"You know Cathy, I'd rather it be you, those lessons, I trust you far more than anyone else. You've played with my mind a bit, but I quickly learned you did everything with planned purpose. You were always honest with me and you've always taken my limits seriously. It seems you've been keeping a low profile recently, but you've always stood by me."

"I know Rob. I'd have moved heaven and earth to do this training for you. But it was Helena's decision. I think she was afraid we'd end up in bed and the distance of a Mistress-sub relationship would have died, we'd get too close. I've heard Michelle is not permitted to have sex with you?"

"She's not, but it was my decision." He chuckled. "Helena's not happy about it. You recall I declared I'd be monogamous with Helena a while back, she was getting too free at giving her toy to friends. So the rule with Michelle and anyone else, is no sexual contact."

"Just as well, when Michelle wants to play rough, it's easier to bear when you're aroused."

"Michelle plays rough, but she does it very well. The only thing I couldn't bear was when she decided to take me into subspace. It didn't go well."

Rob grimaced. "I think she may be hiding something from me, some secret plan between her and Helena for my development. Do you know anything? Michelle mentioned Helena might take me to an event at a private club. She said she had to make me get used to being dressed in my woman's clothes in the company of people, strangers, who are in the same scene. Do you know what's going on?"

Cathy was dumbfounded. "No, sorry. It could be fun to take you out, but I don't know about any events. Could it be she plans to take you to something like the meeting Iris dragged you to?"

"It sounded that way. I'm going to ask Iris about it as well, she's next on my list.

"You talk with Iris?"

"I thought I'd let the secret out but everyone is still surprised. I drop in for a chat with Iris over lunch or tea once or twice a month. She has given me excellent advice. What do you know about this private club, these events?"

"Not much, any more. I visited two places in the past, not often. Then I found a few regular clients who meet my needs. Now I have found myself a group of close friends. It's enough for me, so no, I have no idea of what is around the clubs these days." She paused, thinking. "I can call a few people. I'll do some checking, see what information I can get."

"Typical. Helena is full of surprises. One day she will have one surprise too many."

"Don't say that, Rob. Whatever Helena has gotten wrong in the past, I know she loves you the most of all of us, except me of course." Cathy had a sad smile when she said these words.

Rob knew she was unsure about him, his feelings towards her. He took her in his arms and whispered in her ear, "I love you Cathy. My heart is big enough to love you as well. I do love you." He kissed her with passion.

It took a moment for Cathy to recover her composure. "Rob, what happens next?"

"I'll spend this weekend thinking. I may call you again. I promised Michelle I'd check in with her Monday, I might call you in the afternoon as well. I told Helena I'd be back mid-week to tell her what I've decided."

"Just a moment, I have an idea." Cathy picked up her mobile and dialed a number. "Michelle? Hi, Cathy Mahan here. Say, I've been chatting with Rob and I have an idea." She left the room, gesturing to Rob to stay where he was. He could just hear Cathy was talking, but couldn't make out the words. He relaxed, trusting Cathy was not keeping a secret that could make him unhappy.

She came back into the room with a smile on her face. "You're invited to dinner at Michelle's Sunday night. I'll be there as well. We'll have a good meal, a little wine and we'll talk. I think something good might come of it."

"No scene!"

"Oh, no. Just talk among people who care for each other."

After holding her in his arms for a long minute, then a heartfelt kiss, Rob said goodbye. As he went to his car, he called Iris about coming to visit. She was not available until the following Monday. They agreed on where to meet and talk over lunch Monday.

Chapter 20

Sunday evening, Rob parked in front of Michelle's house and walked to the front door. He could hear a deep bark from Boris after he rang the bell. Michelle opened the door. "Rob, I expect you to just let yourself in, you aren't required to knock."

She led him to her living room, where he found Cathy refilling Iris' wine glass. "What are you people up to?"

"It's a conspiracy, Rob." Iris smiled. "We've been discussing what to do with you, long enough that we're on our second bottle of wine." She stood, Cathy and Michelle were surprised by the comfortable familiarity as she and Rob greeted each other, a warm hug and kissing each other's cheek. "I canceled going to hear the Symphony in Albert Hall so I can share in this conversation."

Soon Rob had his own glass of wine and was sitting with them. "Okay, seriously, what are you up to?"

"You said some things that told me I didn't know everything," Cathy answered. "Tonight we've a plan to learn more. Iris has made some suggestions about how to prepare."

Rob turned to Iris. "Have you, dear? I thought we agreed you and I would stick to a social relationship."

"And we shall. I'd never want to be your mistress." She gave him a wink. "You'd be too much work.

"But I know you well by now, and as it turns out I've known these two ladies for quite some time as well. I've asked some pertinent questions and made a few suggestions." Iris leaned forward, emphasizing her words. "Rob, in our own ways, each of the three of us love you. We all value your friendship. We value you. You're a good man, something we don't often see. Each of us wants you to be happy. Tonight, let's talk about your happiness."

After some casual chat, the man from the restaurant knocked on the door to deliver food. Either he didn't recognize Rob or he was great at not reacting, they exchanged containers for a few pound notes without the slightest hint they'd met before.

Over dinner Cathy began to map out the plan. "Rob, this event Helena would like to take you to, there's one every three or four weeks. She has said nothing to me and little to Michelle, but it's our guess her plan is for you to go with her to many, if not all of them."

"Well, this is interesting." He nodded. "I've told Helena she must tell me all the things she hasn't told me when I visit her mid-week. We shall see if she has anything to say on the topic."

"There is one next Saturday night, part of what we would like to discuss with you."

"What we have in mind, Rob," Iris picked up the thread. "Is a series of experiences for you to help to clarify what you want from all this. We think it's high time you stopped trying for what Helena wants and do this for yourself.