Chapter 13
Jenny lived near the main shopping district in Stratford. Helena could walk to it easily. It was January, the holidays were in the past and the weather was frosty.
Rob pressed the button of the door bell and Jenny opened the door almost immediately. Helena kissed Jenny, gave her a bunch of flowers they'd bought on impulse while driving to her place. Rob was in doubt as to what he should do. Should he kiss her? Jenny decided for him, she grabbed him and pressed her lips on his.
"Hi Rob. I'm so glad you're here. Finally we can talk." She took his arm and practically dragged him inside. Helena followed more slowly, looking about. Her first visit, just a week ago, was a blur. She'd been in such distress she had no memory of what Jenny's place looked like. The dΓ©cor was very feminine; it was obvious she was living alone. The terraced house was narrow and didn't seem large, but it felt like a real home, warm and tastefully decorated.
Jenny left to bring coffee. Helena followed her into the kitchen. She returned with the flowers in a vase that she placed on a cabinet to the side. A framed photo was lying face down on the cabinet. Tilting it upright, she discovered it was down on purpose: the photo was Jenny and Rob's wedding. Even now, she still has feelings for Rob, Helena realized. When Jenny came in with the freshly made coffee, they sat. Helena thanked Jenny for helping her find Rose, confirming where she'd found Rob. Before finishing her coffee, Helena said she had some last-minute shopping to do, she'd leave them alone and be back in less than an hour. After Helena left there was a moment of silence.
Jenny felt the need to get a conversation started. "You'll be very lucky to have Helena as your wife."
"Yes, I will. Still, we have our quarrels, but until now we've been able to make up." Rob looked down.
"You sound as if you have problems. I thought you were happy?"
"I am very happy with Helena. But you know all about my experience with Marion. The two of them, Helena and Marion, are inseparable. Now, Helena is becoming a Mistress, too. Helena is fine on her own, more than one mistress in the house gives me worry, but Marion scares me on her own merits."
Jenny grinned. "Come on, Rob. It's what you always fantasized. I know, I've seen your favorite websites."
"Fantasy and reality are two very different things. Anyway, there's another reason I must talk with you. I was asking myself if I still would feel anger when I was with you, face to face. I must admit, the answer is no, no anger any more.
"Jenny, just one question bothers me. Why did you wait all those years to come out? You could have told me much earlier you wanted to be with women rather than men. I don't understand. I can't get past the feeling we wasted a lot of time, both of us. Well, I didn't think it wasted. But if you were so unhappy with me, why linger on?"
"Rob. I wasn't unhappy with you. On the contrary, we were good together. The problem was my need for women started to grow. It just became an obsession over time. You were so sweet, so trusting, I had a lot of space. I had the chance to go out with women. I could have affairs with some. I did this time and again and it was great, as I had found my true self. But I also felt guilty about you. No matter how you feel now, I knew what pain it would cause you if I told you. So I didn't leave you, at the cost of a bad mood. You must have seen me, angry one day, depressed the next. I blamed you for wasting my time. Looking back, I understand I had only myself to blame.
"Then, at Marion's place, things changed. That pointless game brought me to anger. I was so angry with you, Rob. Now I can say it was nothing you did. But in the moment I had this terrible impulse to take revenge on you. You didn't deserve it. You had done nothing to earn such a treatment. I regretted it so quickly. I've wanted to apologize, but I didn't dare try to face you. I know your temper, I saw your anger when I came to pick up my things, I knew words would be in vain at that point. Then I tried to write you a letter but in the end I couldn't write how I felt. I felt guilty as hell, but I couldn't help myself either. I thought we never could be friends again. But now you're here..."
Rob's looked confused and frustrated, he still didn't understand. "But why did you stay with me? That is what I really want to know and you haven't given me an answer."
"Don't you get it? Because I loved you! Rob, dear, I still love you, but it's - it's different now. I wanted to sleep with women. When you dressed as a woman, it was almost the same. That held me to you all these years. Because you could almost be a woman, you were gentle, sexy and above all, not the typical guy. You were fun to live with you, in your own way. And who knows what could have happened if Helena hadn't shown up..." The words were left hanging in the air.
Suddenly Rob felt great compassion for his ex-wife. She was a victim of her own character, divided between women she lusted for and a husband she loved.
"I think I understand. The bad scene at Marion's place was just out of frustration. Tell me, are you living with a woman now? I recognize some of your old belongings. I've heard Holly doesn't live with you any more. "
"No. I'm alone at the moment. I've had several affairs, but it seems I'm divided between two worlds. After a time I get enough of women, all the jealousy and talk and well, you know how some women can be. Then I miss your strong arms around me, no woman can hold me like you do. So, I'm not dating now. I hook up once in a while, but no relationship." She chuckled. "I put more time into my work so I'm earning better. I'm happy enough."
"God, what a mess we've made." He moved over to her, put his arms around her. "Jenny, I still love you too. We can't get back together, we both understand the barriers." He sat back, Jenny saw his eyes were moist from the emotion of the moment. "Listen, I truly want you to be happy. Please come to me any time you need to feel strong arms around you."
Jenny reached out to take his hand. "So, why the visit now, in a bit of a rush?"
"We're here to invite you to attend our private party, which is to be Saturday next; I have your invitation here." Jenny reached for the envelope, but Rob held it in his hands, not yet giving it over yet.
"Wait a moment, Jenny. There's more. You know I am to marry Helena." Jenny nodded, she knew.
"Saturday is the engagement party. I shall be dressed as a bride for the party, same as Helena. We'll also make a commitment to Marion."
Jenny started to laugh. "You're kidding me!"
"I'm very serious Jenny. The bride thing is of course kinky and fun, but we shall sign legal contracts, Marion will be living officially with us and she's getting lots of rights. They intend Marion, not Helena, will become my Mistress."
"Do you want this Rob? Can you handle these women?"
"That's the barrier. I simply will not accept Marion as my mistress. You were there, you might even have seen the anger on her face as she whipped me. That experience, Marion's and mine, goes unresolved."
"I'm sure you'll be fine."
Rob wished he could be as certain. He saw no reason to argue the point with Jenny.
They went on to catch up with what they'd been doing in the last year. Jenny wanted to know how Rose was, they hadn't seen each other in years. Jenny asked more about Helena, her house, their friends.
"There is more between the engagement and the wedding," Rob told her. "Two more women plan to live with us. In time they will get a contract too, meaning I'll be living with four women. Three of the four are dominas."
Now Jenny started to laugh heartily. The tears flowed over her cheeks from laughing, Rob laughed too; although it wasn't heartily. He knew she didn't mean it badly.
"You have everything you've always wanted. Four women! Are you sure you don't want a fifth? I could help, you know. All those hot bodies..." Again she started to laugh.
When Helena came back from her shopping trip, she found them smiling and in a good mood. Rob told her what started them laughing. "I'll live with four women, but don't worry, only three are dommes."
Helena couldn't do anything but laugh with them. She decided against showing Rob his new lingerie in front of Jenny; who appeared to be more sympathetic than Helena expected. Jenny received her invitation and said she'd be happy to follow the dress code.
"May I stay overnight Helena? I see there will be only women at the party. Maybe I'll get lucky." She gave Helena a smile. Rob saw her do something he'd seen Helena do, she licked her lips like a hungry animal.
When they left, it was as old friends. Rob hugged Jenny, she kissed him on a cheek, then full on his mouth. "I've missed you. I am glad we can be friends again."
She also hugged Helena. "You're a lucky woman," she said. "Take good care of our boy, he's special."
Jenny walked with them to their car. As Rob drove away, Helena told him Jenny kept waving until they were out of sight.
"She still loves you, Rob."