My Sub Nature

Dedicated to my mentor and friend, the man who opened my eyes to a side of me I didn't know existed.

*

This week was going to be something special. Not that every Saturday wasn't special. Already, in the short time since he had discovered me and took me under his tutelage he had pushed my mind and body to heights I had never thought possible. He was the best lover I had ever had and what boggled the mind even more was that was true even before we had had sex. I fidgeted and attempted to keep my mind off the coming meeting. I showered, meticulously shaved my armpits, my pussy and ass, and my strong legs. Pulling the lips of my pussy taunt feeling for tiny hairs I may have missed I shivered wondering how he would abuse me today, and thought of his cock being in me. Mentally shaking myself I finished my grooming ritual. I applied lotion to every part of my body, slowly rubbing it in, starting with my arms and shoulders, working my way down over ample breasts and my tummy. I applied more to my legs and ass, especially my ass- he loved to spank it and I wanted the skin as soft as satin for him if he chose to do so today. I dressed in a red lacy bra, and matching lacy thong panties. Over those I had chosen to wear in an exceedingly short black sweater dress. I completed my outfit with my best black heels. Approvingly I looked at my form in the mirror. I've always been an athletic girl and my curves were accented wonderfully in the dress, though I blushed at the obscene length of it. I could have worn it as a long shirt. It barely covered my ass cheeks and if I bent over in the thong or if the dress rode up any, my ass and thong would be showing. I grabbed the blow dryer from the counter and felt the hot air hit my face as I styled my sassy hair. I couldn't help but glance at the clock. 1:35pm He could be here any minute. I pulled my make-up bag down from the cupboard and applied just the basics; I was a very pretty girl, I didn't need much. Just some accents for my big blue eyes and a little mascara.

I couldn't help but smile seductively at my image in the mirror. Squaring my shoulders I walked from the bathroom, and sat at my computer to wait. But sitting here only made me think of him. I'd found him online. Or rather, he had found me. We talked at great length of our upcoming sessions. Today was going to be an endurance test. Vibe training was how he had described it. On top of that, I had mistakenly asked for a zipper. I loved the hurt of the clothespins pinching my nipples, it made my pussy wet to think about it. But to have several pinching me connected by a string and then to have them just ripped off? What had I been thinking? I shivered with fear and anticipation and then I heard the knock at the door. As customary he always came to the door. He played such a gentleman, smiling widely at me when I opened it.

"You look beautiful," he exclaimed his deep brown eyes glinting with passion and cruelty as he took in the length of my legs. I loved when he said beautiful. I've always been classified as 'cute.' Puppies are cute. It turned me on to think he thought of me as beautiful. I couldn't help but return his smile.

"Thank you," I replied walking out the door a little taller for the compliment. Swinging the door behind me, I turned and locked it. He led the way to his vehicle, opening the passenger door of the truck for me. Again he played the gentleman, at least for this part of our meetings. I turned to face him, a crooked and cocky smile on my lips as I stood on my tiptoes and inched my ass up on the seat then swung my legs around. "All set?" He asked the frustration of being denied a view of my ass when I climbed in raw in his voice. I wanted to laugh at his response, but knew better, pinching my lips together I nodded and he shut the door. Fear began to grip me and butterflies and desire mingled in my stomach like a corporate slut at a classy Christmas party. I watched him take his seat and put the truck into reverse. He drove a manual and his hand was next to my knee. He smelled great. He always smelled great. Inevitably he reached over and felt the smoothness of my leg. I heard a faint mutter of approval as he caressed it for a minute then gave it a finger snapping slap. I didn't flinch, I just looked at him and gave him one of my sexiest smiles and he grinned back. He knew I liked the pain to a certain extent.

The ride to the motel was uneventful. I was discussing my fears with him about the upcoming zipper and he was reassuring me there would definitely be pleasure today along with the pain. This eased my mind. It was one thing to take pure punishment. It was another thing entirely to have something to focus my mind on besides the agonizing pleasure and pain combination of his vibe on my hypersensitive clit. He laughed when I had admitted I hated the vibe. Well no, I didn't hate it; it felt great... at first. But if he allowed me to orgasm-, which he usually did, then it would begin to hurt as he continued to hold it to me. Since I was easily brought to orgasm anyway and multiples as a general rule, this could happen very quickly and the sensations caused by the vibe could become very overwhelming, frightening and downright painful, especially with the vibe on its high setting. He knew all of this. He reveled in it and today, well, today I would be helpless to stop this torment for as long as he saw fit to punish and pleasure me. I quivered with anticipation. He didn't know it, I had never admitted it to him, but this was a secret fantasy of mine come true.

Stealing a glance at him as we neared the motel, my heart fluttered. I really did adore this man. He had shown me so much, experimentally moving me from one realm of satisfaction to heights that could not even be comprehended and at times I felt guilty and ashamed of. Yet, this didn't stop me. My fear of the pain would be faced. I trusted him utterly and with my life. He had taught me, a good dominant seeks to give the subordinate what their deepest desires are in a safe and controlled manor. This might not always be pleasure. It might be cruelty and abuse. I loved a combination of both, and he was pleased to provide this for me.

The motel was never anything special. But today it seemed increasingly looming as I approached the door; it had a tacky brass number four hanging slightly off center. My backpack was slung over one shoulder, and conscientious of my dress as it began to ride up slightly, I tugged at its base. Hurrying to the room, I pulled the blinds closed and waited for him. He came in, shut and locked the door and we set to work. We laid our toys all out. He had bought me a butt plug, a dildo, lots of rope, which was already cut into predetermined lengths, a blindfold and several clothespins (the good kind with the holes on the end- perfect for a zipper.) I wasn't entirely sure what he would need so I set everything out. His supplies for the day included condoms, saran wrap, a new kind of rope, duct tape, two different ball gags, one with holes- though I preferred the solid one, and of course the vibrating wand.

Sometimes he liked to wrestle me to the ground. So I wasn't sure how to begin once we had everything laid out. So I just sat patiently on the edge of the bed and waited for him to begin. It didn't take long. He selected the rope lengths he wanted and approached me. I stood, suddenly frightened, my fight or flight instincts activated despite my trust. He grinned and grabbed my arms roughly, and I pulled away. He gave me a frown. "So you want to fight?" he asked and gave me a disappointed look. I couldn't help but let a playful giggle out, but said nothing just handing him my wrists. He began to tie them again but before he could get them secured I pulled another back. His irritation was showing as his lips puckered. He was done fucking around. He grabbed me by my throat and pressed hard. Not hard enough to damage me but hard enough to know I shouldn't continue with my antics if I wanted to enjoy today.

I bit my lip and looked into his cruel eyes for a minute, his hand still on my throat. "Take off your dress." He ordered. I obeyed instantly tossing it to the floor the second he let my throat go. A third time he grabbed my wrists and this time he tied them fast. Taking a second piece of rope he attached it to my wrists and roughly yanked me over to the bathroom door. Lifting my arms up over my head with the second rope he went over the door frame and secured it out of my vision. He undid my bra and pulled it away from my large breasts. My nipples were already hard. He pulled my thongs out of my ass crack and then just said, "Get rid of those." I wriggled my hips back and forth and for a minute I didn't think I was going to be able to obey, but eventually they slid from my hips and I kicked them off along with my heels. He was grabbing materials in the other room. Coming back to the doorway I watched as his hand rose to hit my tit hard. I squeaked and backed away, my ass pressing hard against the bathroom door. His hand missed my breast though I felt the wind of the swing caress it. He tried again and I backed away again. "Please Sir," I pleaded flinching and pulling father back as he continued to swing at me.

"Please what?" He asked and I yipped again though he missed yet again.

"I haven't even hit you yet!" He exclaimed in surprise at the fear he could not mistake that was plain on my face and resonating in my voice.

"Stupid little bitch," he muttered more to himself then to me as he began describing to me what he was doing with more rope.

"Stand on your tiptoes." He commanded and I did. Expertly he fastened a rope through my legs, pulling it painfully against my pussy and ass, it too went up over the door and was secured on the other side. If I lowered myself at all, or moved, the rope dug painfully into my tender wet pussy. I swallowed.

It was then he pulled out the clothespins. My mind was racing and excitement washed through me at the sight of those little colored bastards. He placed two on my breasts, one on the nipple directly and another just off the areola. My nipples sensitive for being so large were undergoing excruciating torture from the little pins and I couldn't stop the whimper that escaped me as he put them on.

"Oh I forgot to connect them." He muttered slapping each breast hard with his fingers, wrenching a gasp from me each time before he removed them and strung them together. He smiled lovingly then as he placed them back on my aching nipples. I tried not to cry out this time. I didn't want to give him that satisfaction, so I bit my lip instead but it didn't work. The pins hurt, and my nipples were throbbing. I couldn't keep the little whimpers back. He seemed displeased that I was not taking this better, and quickly he put the solid ball gag into my mouth and blindfolded me. My calves were beginning to burn from standing on my tiptoes and the crotch-rope was digging painfully into my pussy, so wonderfully painful it began to make me even wetter. My heart was pounding in my ears and I felt the wonderful sensation of adrenaline release fill my body. If I could have smiled around the ball gag I would have. Everything still hurt, in fact it almost seemed heightened, but at the same time, I knew I could do this. The rope on my pussy had absorbed some of my juices and it wasn't so bad now, I lowered myself on my toes just a bit and let it dig in. I enjoyed the pain and the easement on my legs. But that wasn't to last long.

It was then I heard the vibe and when he pressed it expertly to my exposed hard clit I couldn't control the little start that pulled the crotch rope even tighter and harder into my pussy then I would have believed possible. I whined at the deliciousness of the sensations. The vibe was on low, and it was building me quickly towards an orgasm. "I'll let you decide when I should pull the zipper dear, but feel free to cum at anytime," he said his voice full of mischief. Then he turned the vibe to high and pressed it cruelly against my quivering flesh. I couldn't stop the small scream that erupted from my throat. The vibe on high was more than I could generally handle as it was. My clit is sensitive. Before I had met this man, just rubbing around it gently with my finger would bring me swiftly to orgasm, even squirting orgasms and now I had this machine stimulating it with ferocity. I came quickly and yet he held it to me. The force of the vibrations made me quiver and I tried to back away from it but this just made the crotch rope to once again dig in painfully. I didn't care, the vibe was so intense it hurt, and I needed the pain from the crotch rope to keep myself from calling red. It was just so intense. You can do this, I told myself again and again, I didn't want to disappoint him; I never wanted to disappoint him. My fear was growing, my nipples hurt more and more the longer the clips were on. He had said eventually they will stop hurting, and go kind of numb but I'd never found this to be true. Certain parts of my body were just too vulnerable to sensation, my nipples and clit being the two most so, and the two he's chosen to train me on today. I could feel nothing but the hurt on my clit and the hurt on my nipples and the rush of adrenaline once again as I contemplated telling him to pull the zipper.

But as I reached orgasm again and yet again, each time the vibe growing more and more painful on my clit, I began to feel as though I was reaching a plateau of contentment. The pain was growing distant as were the muffled screams I didn't realize were coming from my own throat. It was then I felt the vibe taped to my leg and my arms let down and my perfectly painful crotch rope eased. Still being stimulated I was moved to the bed and laid on my back. I don't know how he secured my bonds again, or if he even did. By this time all I could acknowledge was fear of the pull, pain and a strange pleasure pain on my tortured and dripping wet pussy.

My head thrashed back and forth as he pushed the vibe back to me hard and once again turned up the speed. "Tell me when to pull it dear," he reminded me, and began to taunt... "Did you say pull?" "Was that pull dear?" he was asking over and over at my screams. It was then a particularly violent forced orgasm hit me and it jolted me back to consciousness. "PULL!" I screamed around my gag, bracing myself for the pain. I waited, and it seemed like an eternity. But all that came was the agony on my clit after the orgasm. You fucking bastard my mind balked, as I realized he hadn't pulled the zipper and wasn't planning on it yet.

"Did you say pull dear?" he asked innocently as I gazed at him with hazy eyes. Throwing my head back on the bed all I could do was whimper at the pain and pleasure between my legs. I couldn't let this go on any longer... I was at the verge of insanity when the most excruciating pain I've yet to feel pulled at my nipples like fire licking the skin. I heard a scream erupt from someone else it seemed though it ripped from my own throat and I turned to my side, drawing my legs up. The fire burned on, my nipples throbbing and my mind slowly coming back to some sense of order. I realized he'd turned the vibe off, and was holding me. Pulling me onto my back, my ass towards the edge of the bed. I felt his cock enter my slick hot pussy. This was the real satisfaction he knew I would need and he began to fuck my pussy hard. His thrusts were strong and deep as he held my hips. Then, slowed, and I watched in disbelief as he pulled my tortured and bruising nipples taunt and put a clothespin on each. I cried out at the agony of having the clothespins placed back on after what I had just endured. He began fucking me again, my tits bouncing, and the weight of the pins pulling painfully with each bounce. I cried out as I reached yet another magnificent orgasm that clenched my pussy around his thick dick, and I heard him grunting his approval. It was not long until he reached his climax as well cumming deep in my constricting pussy. He stayed inside me a minute longer then one might think necessary as his head sank and he still held my hips. Reaching forward he took the clips from my nipples gently, and pulled me into his arms. His hands caressed my hair and I struggled to come back to reality and to catch my breath.

"That was amazing," he whispered in my ear and my heart smiled, only to drop when he said, "ready for round two?"

Round two? My mind was already racing at the thought of what he could possibly have in store for me now after all that. Then I remembered what we had talked about. I couldn't force myself to answer him, so I just gave him my best-pleading look, letting him see into my soul, and then lowered my head, nodding. I wasn't ready. Not really ready for anything else. I wanted to be held in his arms and sleep for a while together, but that was not to be. My mentor knows me too well. He knows I love the cruelty, he knows I love to be pushed- with pain, pleasure, endurance and the mind fucks.

"Stand." He ordered his voice taking on a coldness it only had when I could tell he was warring with himself, as he began to untie the ropes around me. He had to know how exhausted I was, but it must have been a turn on for him that even knowing it I would subject myself to his every demand, to his every whim, willingly and with adoration. I stood, eyes lowered, waiting for his next command.

I knew what round two would be. We had discussed this. Round two I was to be mummified with the vibe and this would be a 'no red,' portion of our play. I had agreed to this because I was concerned in this situation I might abuse my safety word and call it because I just couldn't 'take anymore,' and the point of this exercise was to bring me past that limit and force orgasms I didn't want. I shivered at the prospect.

"Hold this to you between your arm and your side," he commanded, pulling the saran wrap tightly to me. I clenched my arm down against the plastic and myself, and he began to slowly circle me with the roll. This was the first time I had ever been in saran, and I didn't find it uncomfortable. It hugged me tightly, and I tried to imagine it was his arms around me, holding me like I wanted him to a few minutes prior. But that idea soon vanished from my mind as the saran started to tighten more than I was anticipating and I was covered by it securely from ankles to just under my breasts and then just over my breasts. He had left my tits to hang out on purpose. I shivered at what he would do to my poor throbbing nipples.

"Try to move." He commanded. And I obeyed; struggling against the plastic was useless. I sighed in frustration and he grinned his evil and cruelest grin. Then pushed me backward. As I was falling I knew the bed was directly behind me but I shrieked anyway. And I bounced hard on it, the cheap springs protesting the abuse nearly as loudly as me. He had placed the vibe between my legs before wrapping them up tightly in the plastic and now that I was safely on my back on the bed, he turned it on again, though I could tell it was on low. I breathed a sigh of relief, he would take this slower.

Already though I could feel my body responding to the vibe. My pussy still wet from when he fucked me earlier was juicing once again. I was desperate to cum and I tried to grind against the vibe, though I was still wrapped tight. Unfortunately my struggles dislodged the vibe enough that it was no longer directly on my clit, and the sensations began to lessen even more.

"Oh! Oh no," I protested in complaint.

"What's wrong?" he asked immediately, I could see his eyes scanning me, checking my safety.

"It's moved!" I cried out whining and trying to thrust my hips or open my legs but I couldn't. I felt his hand pressing the vibe back down between them; it was coming close to my clit but not quite getting there. The frustration was maddening as my orgasm that was so close to pulling a gushing torrent of pussy juice from my body began to simmer down.