Later that month, I had the procedure to reverse my tubal ligation. Master paid six grand out of pocket because my insurance didn't cover fertility treatments. About the cost, he'd shrugged. "If I can't afford that, I got no business havin' kids," he'd reasoned. He had a point.
After asking him for the tenth time if he was sure he wanted this, he took off his belt and had me grab my ankles. We stood in his still-empty living room so the cracks! of the impact and the stomps of my feet as I caught my balance resounded in the space. "Guess you want me to beat it into you," he'd said. It hurt so much I got emotional and cried a little afterward, but I tried to hide it. He hadn't meant to hurt my feelings, just give me some painful stripes to impress upon me who's always in charge. I was not to question that when he expressed himself, he meant every word of what he said.
After, he held me in a facsimile of comfort. Hollis doesn't understand bringing his body close to mine for reasons other than lust. There was something devoid of meaning in his embrace, but I appreciated the effort. "Ya know," he said at last, "I wouldn't raise my hand to our children. No corporal punishments for the kids. I don't want you to worry--I know how monsters are made. They're gonna be normal."
"I doubt that they'll be normal. But I believe you that you'll never hurt them." Did I? I guess this was the first time he indicated he understood that making me pregnant would result in... parenting. Until that moment, he mostly talked about it like it was a fetish: He wanted to impregnate me, fuck me all through the pregnancy, play with my lactating tits, show off to the world what he'd done to my body with his manhood. I was happy to indulge him in all his desires. I did hope he remembered that they came with the price of a demanding, helpless human being.
I'd given my landlord notice that I'd be moving out. I'd waited until Master forced the issue. My caution about jumping into that part of things too soon just offended him; that I kept my place aroused suspicion. I just didn't believe he was real and I hadn't lost my mind. I waited for the delusion, or spell, or whatever it was to wear off. More stripes from my Master's belt disabused me of that notion.
So, after the surgery, I had to abstain from vaginal sex for two weeks while I healed. After that, it would be three months of "safe sex" before we could try to get me pregnant.
For those first two weeks, I stayed at my place. I didn't trust Hollis to control himself if he wanted to fuck. He was smart enough to understand that it was necessary to wait if he wanted a baby later, but delayed gratification wasn't my man's strong suit. If he was horny and the moon was full (that is a thing with him), he'd have me right then and remember later that we were waiting. It might have been the first time Hollis had ever waited for sex in his life, come to think of it.
One night, I was lazily packing up my apartment. I didn't have many possessions and wanted to draw out the task to stay busy; I longed to tear into him again, too, so needed to occupy my hands, at least. As I puttered around, I frequently found myself in front of a mirror to admire the locked chain around my neck. No object had ever meant more or given me real comfort. I was wrapping newspapers around glassware when my phone rang. It was after midnight, so my heart pounded because I knew it had to be him.
"Puppy," he stated. His voice was thick and sent shivers through my viscera. Then small incision from the procedure ached because I'd done it for him, and it was another reminder of his Ownership.
"Master," I squeaked. "I really miss you!"
"Uh-huh. So much you gotta stay away from me," he teased. "I could come over."
"No, but only because I can tell you've been drinking. I'll be a nervous wreck if you drive anywhere. Are you at home?"
"Yeah, I'm home. I stopped at the bar outta boredom. All I can think about is makin' our baby."
"My love, you know we can't have unprotected sex for three months, right?"
"But I can still fuck you, right? Otherwise, things are gonna get real rough for you." He growled the words, slow and ominous.
"H-how do you mean?" I asked after swallowing hard.
"I'll have to take it out on you in other ways... if it can't be sex, it'll be violent. I'm gon' try to be faithful to ya, but I ain't never gone three months without pussy."
"You don't have to go that long! Do you want me to visit you tomorrow? There are things I could do to get you off--I understand you have needs! You know I love to taste you, Master."
I knew exactly how needy and desperate I sounded. Fortunately, we were at the sweet spot in our love story where that was delicious--I'd descended in submission, but not fallen so far I felt like a ball and chain.
His sudden moan had me weak in the knees. "Keep talkin' to me like that, girl," he said. Now I could picture him stroking.
"If I were there, I'd get on my knees and beg you to let me suck your cock. You'd slap my face for being a whore, then you'd take it out for me to lick until it was wet. Can you feel that, my love?"
"Uh-huh. Your little tongue is so good, Puppy. Wanna feel it on my balls next... lick me all over."
"Mmm. I hold your hard cock against my cheek and stroke while I lower my head to tongue your balls and kiss and suck them, too. I love the taste of your sweat... your scent. I use my fingers on that smooth, taut spot behind... Do you like that?"
"Yeah. You're so sweet I forget what a slut you can be. But I like that ya know how to suck dick. I'm so hard for you now, baby..."
"Oh! I wish I could see you touching yourself, Master," I sighed. "I'm all wet already..."
"I know. I wish this place had internet. I'd put cameras all over your apartment so I could watch my little pet all the time."
If anyone but him said that to me, I'd be creeped out. My Master is too full-on crazy to be creepy. And being Owned was breaking down my natural barriers. Things like space and privacy were less vital than they'd been just weeks ago before I saw my ethereal hitchhiker.
"I'd want to see you, too. Especially when you're jerking off. I bet you look gorgeous with your strong hand wrapped around your huge cock," I purred. I lay on the living room rug, where I'd been pacing with manic energy. I had to be still and focus to make this good for him.
"Your voice changed. What's different?" he asked.
"I'm on my back--it relaxes my vocal cords. What about you?" I asked.
"I'm on our bed. Feels weird in here without you."
"I'll make it feel better soon, Daddy."
"Nghh," he groaned, "need ya here to lick up all this precum," he tantalized. "I'm a mess."
Then he chuckled at the effect he'd had when I moaned naturally. "Dirty girl."
"Sorry, Master. I just want to lick it up so bad, suck you real hard the way you like until you grab my hair and fuck my throat..."
The phone caught his panting breath. It was loud and raspy in my ear. "I love how ya take it. Love seein' the tears run down your cheeks, your face gets all wet from slobber and tears and ya turn real pink... so fuckin' sweet..."
"I want you so bad right now! I think you're the Devil, Hollis."
"Maybe I am, girl. I'll eat your soul and you'll love it..."
His breath started to catch and I could just make out the sound of his rough hand brushing rapidly along his length.
"Mmm, can I listen? I want to hear the sound of you stroking yourself, Master."
"You're a crazy bitch. Here ya go, babe," he breathed and held the phone so I could hear the fleshly sound of him masturbating. There was something vulnerable about this that touched my heart. Sure, lots of girls had been fucked by my Master. I got his secret desire.
"You like that?" he panted when he returned the phone to his ear.
"Love it! It's so beautiful!" I exclaimed.
"Let me hear, too. Show me that you really want me."
I was surprised he couldn't hear the wet squishes as clearly as I could, but I did oblige him.
"Can you hear what you do to me?" I asked.
He half-chuckled, half-moaned. "Ohhh, baby girl. Make me come now," he commanded.
"I'm close, too, Master. Am I allowed to come tonight?"
I shouldn't have remembered to ask.
"No. Not tonight. I don't think ya really want my dick enough yet."
"Ngh! I do want it! I want you inside me filling me up with buckets of cum so it runs out of me for days. I want you to get me pregnant, I want you walk me on my leash when I'm big as a house and then bend me over and fuck me wherever we are!"
That did it, as I thought it would--I heard a loud, complex growl as his orgasm ripped forcefully through his whole body. I heard the thud his body made after his back had arched and dropped onto the hard mattress.
"Fuck, it's everywhere. I gotta get to sleep. G'night." He hung up, just like that.
I lay on the floor laughing like a fool. It didn't frustrate me too much that I wasn't allowed to get off. It made me happy that he needed me to be dependent on him for that. In his mind, it was bad enough I still had my own place where I could do as I pleased; I shouldn't be permitted orgasms whenever the need arose.
I hugged my knees into my chest, rocking to massage my back on the floor. My bruised uterus didn't like that much. I got up and watched TV to take a stab at falling asleep. My lovesick brain wouldn't drift off. Basic cable was showing some trash about housewives, and I imagined the twisted things my man could do to each of them with pain and terrifying pleasure beyond their comprehension. Then he'd rearrange all those plastic surgeons' best work and sign it with cum.
My last thought before sleep finally claimed me was to wonder when I'd kill someone again for Hollis. For Master.
*****
I left the apartment in like-new condition, so got my full security deposit back. I decided to put it into some home improvements at Master's place. I was careful not to make any big aesthetic changes--I didn't paint everything pink or some girly shit like that--but if we were going to raise a baby there, the mold that had been uncovered by the big clean-out had to be dealt with. I had no idea how Mac would cope with a crying baby; a sickly crying baby might cause one of us to snap.
I needed something to do with myself to feel useful, too. Putting up new drywall, repairing some rotting floorboards and cracked tiles, anything that wasn't a matter of taste and just needed doing would be good to keep me active and feeling like a worthy partner.
"How do you know how to do this shit?" he asked. I knew it was because I'm a woman that he was surprised, but I let it go.
"I've had a lot of jobs in my life. I worked for a company that did renovations. I don't know how to do anything advanced, but basic things, I can do. This way the rugrats won't get hurt crawling around," I laughed.
Hollis looked around at his place. "I think this could be... like a home for real people."
I knew just what he meant. Not psychos like us, but respectable types keeping it together. When we finally did get caught the neighbors would tell the reporters, "They seemed like such a normal couple, kept their house nice..."
*****
After eleven weeks, my birthday rolled around. This was going to be a happy one for a change: I'd done none of the things I'd set as goals for myself, and yet I'd found a sense of purpose and place in the world. I never thought that in my waking life I'd find myself an Owned submissive to a master with whom I'd fallen madly in love.
He arranged a surprise for me that was much more than I'd expected, which had been nothing at all. I hadn't told him because I didn't want to put any pressure on him. And maybe I didn't think he was the kind of guy to care about birthdays and I didn't need to set up a situation in which I'd just be disappointed. Then I forgot all about it.
