Lost in the Wind

This is the story of how Cassy met her Master and the events that led to him to send her to the clinic in the series "Finding Home." If you have not already read "Finding Home", I would encourage you to read those stories as well. Enjoy. Xantu.

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

Cassy always knew which stop was hers without even looking up from the book she was reading. She did not even stop reading as she got off the bus.

Nineteen and painfully shy Cassy either had her nose in a book or was at work at the bookstore. She wore too much eyeliner and shadow, her big blue eyes seemed to take over her little girl face.

The whole store was on edge. The manager, Mr. Janings had let everyone know that the owner was coming in to tour the store. Mr. Landauer hardly ever came to the store. Cassy had never seen him. The other employees whispered that he was some kind of vampire or something, that he only showed up after dark.

Cassy stayed in the back rooms most of the time she was at work, going over invoices and restocking shelves. She could deal with customers but she preferred the company of books. She was always the first to volunteer for this job. Cassy avoided talking as much as she could. Even when she did talk, she had a habit of whispering.

Picking up an armload of children's books, Cassy made her way to the children's section. Located in the back corner of the store, it was a brightly lit, colorful area with two big chairs and a table surrounded with child sized chairs.

The books that Cassy was restocking were on a low shelf. Cassy thought to herself that all the shelves in the children's section were low shelves. She pulled one of the tiny chairs over to sit on, reluctant to kneel. God knows what the little sticky fingered monkeys had spilled on the carpet, and anyway at five feet tall and weighing less than 95 lbs, the chair was not that much too little.

"Shit." Cassy whispered to herself, someone had totally buggered up the book order. God she hated kids. She began to sort out the mess when she heard the manager's voice.

"As you can see we have done a great job of making this a welcoming area for children and their parents. Our sales figures in children's books have increased significantly since we have added these features...

Cassy looked up and almost squeaked in alarm. Two pairs of legs were uncomfortably close to her.

"Oh my goodness, Cassy, I didn't see you down there. Let me introduce you to Mr. Nathan Landauer, the store owner."

Cassy scrambled to her feet and backed away quickly, her eyes nervously downcast. She quickly stooped and picked up the books she had been working with and held them in front of her chest, almost a shield.

"Mr. Landauer this is Cassy Chambers. She has been with us for almost a year now. She has never missed a day of work.

Cassy nervously looked up and was transfixed. He was nothing like she had expected. All the vampire talk had filled her imagination with shadows and darkness. What filled her vision now was light, dazzling beautiful light. His hair was perfect icy white, his skin was ivory. He wore a round dark glasses perching alien and mechanical on his perfect angel face. Somehow they emphasized the sense that he was not of this world.

His voice was deep and rich, "Its nice to meet you Miss Chambers. Do you like working here?"

Cassy's voice was tiny and soft, trembling with nervousness, "Yes sir, I like books."

Mr. Janings interrupted, "Cassy is very good with inventory and organization. She knows where every book in the store is, front or back room. We rely on her a lot during inventory."

Mr. Landauer did not seem to be listening to the manager speak at all. Cassy had the oddest feeling that he was staring right through her, like those odd round glasses had some supernatural power to see right inside her head.

"I... I... really have a lot to do..." She began to back away and then practically ran to the back room.

On the way, she heard Mr. Janings say, "She is impossibly shy but damn good with inventory."

Mr. Landauer's voice was thoughtful, "Pretty little thing though."

Cassy had little sense of the passage of time, her life was an endless series of work, bus, home, bus, work... She was hardly aware of her surroundings, preferring the worlds she found between the pages of books. She bought Top Ramen and diet Coke by the case. She never really wanted anything else. Food all tasted the same to her.

The only variation to her life was when the restless fear in the night would drive here out to walk in the dark, walk to the bridge and stand there high above the city lights below. She would stand balanced on the railing, her arms spread wide, the wind blowing her hair, pushing at her body, urging her to step out. Cassy knew it was just a matter of time before the wind would embrace her, sweep her off and she could fall.

Mr. Janings voice was hurried and not just a little irritated. "Mr. Landauer was impressed by your attendance record. He wants to interview you for a position of being a private reader."

Cassy nodded, with a confused look on her face. Her voice barely above a whisper. "Um... whats that?"

He has problems with his eyes. He wants to find someone to read aloud to him."

"Here at the store?"

"No Cassy. He wants you to come to his house." Mr. Janings' voice took a serious tone. "Cassy, I really don't know a lot about Mr. Landauer. He only comes to the store a few times a year. You don't have to do this if you don't want to."

"No, its OK."

"If he tries anything... anything inappropriate you let me know. Not that I have any reason to suspect anything. Its just you are so young and considering your... um... background."

Cassy's case manager had gotten her this job when she had aged out of the foster care system. Mr. Janings really did not know anything specific but he had developed a protective attitude towards this tiny blond girl.

"He seems nice enough."

"Well remember that there are laws to protect employees from sexual harassment."

Cassy blushed and looked down at the floor. She had never dated or had a boyfriend. She had never even been kissed. But she had read plenty of very sexually explicit books. She knew all about sex. At least she thought she did. Somehow the idea of being sexually harassed by that ethereally beautiful man did not seem to be such a bad idea.

A cab picked her up around 6:00 pm from the store. Cassy wore what she wore to work, khaki pants and navy polo shirt with her name pin fastened above her right breast. Her hair was pulled back in a pony tail. She never dressed any different. She did not own any other clothes.

It was quite a long cab drive. Cassy could not remember the last time she had been this far outside the city. She wondered how she was going to get back and forth if he decided he wanted her.

There was a gate standing open. The driver seemed familiar with the drive. He drove past a large dark mansion, the grounds were overgrown and not a single light showed in any of the windows. It looked like something out of a Gothic horror novel.

The cabby's voice was sharp and nasal, "Nobody has lived in that place nigh on seven years now. Mr. Landauer stays in the carriage house. His family has owned this place since the turn of the century."

The cab pulled up next to a more modest sized building with a porch light gleaming small and lonely in the dusk. "Mr. Landauer says for you to go up and knock. He says I am supposed to wait here, until you come back out. Easy night for me. If I am asleep when you come back out, just knock on the window."

Walking up to that door in the fading evening light was on one of the hardest things Cassy had ever done. The door seemed to loom taller and taller as she approached. If she had not been so far from home, she felt like she may have just bolted.

Halfway up the walk she stopped and looked back at the cab. The driver had already leaned back in his seat and pulled down his cap over his eyes. A soft breeze swirled around her, tugging at her hair, blowing a few leaves across the ground. She could hear the rustle and sway of the trees.

A tiny shiver of panic traveled down her spine when the door opened, swinging wide, noiselessly, by an unseen hand. A soft light turned on in the dark hall beyond and he was there, a silhouette in the soft light.

"I heard the cab pull up. Don't be afraid. I won't bite you. Come in."

Cassy cast one last look back at the cab gleaming yellow in the dark, a life preserver in the night, and took a deep breath. She forced her feet to walk up and into the house. He walked ahead of her. "Lets talk in the library. That is where you will be reading. That is, if I decide you will do."

Cassy looked at the back of Mr. Landauer as he led her deeper into the house. He wore a soft dark shirt and pants of a darker shade, his shining white hair hung smooth and straight down his back. Cassy noticed his feet were bare.

They entered into a room with books on all the walls. Books, dark wood trim and heavy red curtains covered every wall except for a softly flickering gas fire place. He turned to face her, she saw that his shirt was open and that a silvery sparkle of chest hair gleamed across the defined muscles of his chest. He wore the round dark glasses. He was looking at her, his lips twisted with irritation.

Cassy's eyes flinched away from his face and looked around the room. One whole side of the library was dominated by a huge grand piano. The only other furniture was a large dark leather chair with a matching ottoman. A straight backed wooden kitchen chair sat facing the larger chair looking lonely and out of place.

His voice held an edge of contempt, "I am curious why you chose to wear that outfit. It is hardly appropriate for an interview."

Cassy looked down at her worn, slightly soiled khakis and scuffed tennis shoes. Her voice was barely audible, "I came straight from work sir."

"You will have to wear something more suitable when... if you come read for me. I will require..." He cleared his throat. "I would prefer you dressed more... attractively."

"I am sorry sir, these are the only clothes I have."

"Don't you go out?"

"Out sir? No not much."

"What do you do when you aren't at work?"

"Read sir."

"Ah, another book lover. I am pleased we have that in common. Sit down please." He indicated the kitchen chair. Cassy sat ramrod straight, her knees clamped together, her backpack clutched to her chest.

"Do you always speak so softly?"

Cassy cleared her throat and forced herself to match his volume. "I am sorry sir, its a nervous habit. I will try to speak up."

"Would you mind if I lowered the lights? These glasses get to be a pain after a while."

"No sir."

He walked to the door and turned a knob. The lights dimmed until the room was mostly dark. He pulled off the glasses and sighed rubbing his hands over his eyes. "Thanks, sometimes it feels like these things are going to pull my eyes right out their sockets."

Cassy looked at him curiously. His eyes were a perfect complement to his finely chiseled features, large and deeply set with thick white lashes. In the dim light she could not tell what color his eyes were. She wondered if they were pink like the rats at the pet store.

He came to sit in the leather chair, propping his feet on the ottoman. His features lit by the flickering light of the fireplace. "Have you done any reading?"

"No sir."

"What kinds of books do you like to read."

"Fiction mostly, but I have read a lot of biographies, history, and true crime stuff. I like most everything except how to books."

"How to?"

"Books that teach you how to do something, like cook books, exercise books, self help books, stuff like that."

"What is your favorite book?"

"Oh, that is hard sir. Sometimes it seems like it is the one I am reading at the time, but if you would allow me to narrow it down to two, they would be Cannery Row and Dandelion Wine."

"Oddly I have read neither."

"I would love to read them to you sir. I think everyone should read them."

"Lets hear you read something then." He got up and picked up a book from a shelf. "This is one I have always meant to read." He handed it to her along with a personal book light that would just illuminate pages of the book.

The book was Robinson Crusoe by Danial Defoe. Cassy blanched, she had read that and found the language and sentence structure horrible. "This is not easy to read but I will do my best."

"You are familiar with it?"

"Oh yes sir, I love the story but its language is archaic and I remember that the sentences go on forever." At first Cassy was nervous and her voice shook, but as the story unfolded she felt herself get pulled in, her voice warming and becoming more vibrant. Forgetting the man sitting watching her, she painted pictures with her voice.

He interrupted her, "I can see what you mean about the way the book is written. You have a lot of natural talent. You love to read and it shows in your voice."

Cassy looked up from the book, remembering where she was. "Does it mean I get the job?"

"Until you displease me. You will continue to work at the bookstore half time and spend the other half of your time reading to me. I will inform Jansen that you have new duties. You will be paid for the time you are in the cab. Get yourself something more appropriate to wear."

"Like what sir?"

"Something pretty, feminine, skirts, dresses, no pants, wear your hair down."

He showed her to the door. "Thank you for coming Cassy. I don't often spend time around people. I am sorry if I seem strange." He held out his hand to shake hers.

Cassy shyly held out her hand. He took it and then held it up to look closer under the lights of the hall. "You bite your nails."

Cassy felt a wave of embarrassment. She was usually careful to keep her hands hidden. "Another nervous habit sir."

"Its unattractive."

"My case manager always said when I really wanted to, I would stop."

"Well now you have a good reason to want to stop."

"A good reason sir?"

"I don't like it at all."

"Um... OK sir." Cassy doubted she could ever stop but at the same time she felt too overwhelmed by the force of this man's personality to argue that point.

Shopping was always a challenge. There was hardly any selection in the petite section at the discount store. She picked out a couple of knee length dark skirts, and a few white and finely printed long sleeved blouses. She chose a pair of low black heels and some nude pantie hose.

Mr. Landauer had left a message at the store for her to bring a copies of Cannery Row and Dandelion Wine with her when she came to read. Cassy felt a surge of confidence. She knew she would do great reading these books.

The store had a nice leather bound copy of Cannery Row, part of a complete Steinbeck library. On impulse Cassy added Sweet Thursday thinking that the pair shouldn't be separated. The store didn't have a hardback copy of Dandelion Wine. There wasn't much of a market for science fiction in hard back.

Cassy changed into one of her new outfits and looked in the mirror. She felt uncomfortable. She had never worn a dress or pantie hose ever before in her life. At least not that she could remember. She put on some extra eyeliner and shadow.

During the long cab ride Cassy pulled out a new book she had recently picked up from the second hand section of the store. Employees could buy second hand stock and return it for a full refund if the books were in the same condition.

The book was the first in a series of erotic interpretations of a fairy tale. There was a lot of graphic sex, with extreme violence. The prince had made a sex slave of the princess, tying her up and subjecting her to endless humiliations, keeping her in endless torment. Cassy found the helpless surrender of the princess very exciting.

The book made the cab ride go by quickly. As they pulled into the long dark drive, Cassy quickly stuffed the fairy tale into her back pack. She ran a comb through her baby soft hair, frowning as the waves refused to to lay down flat, floating soft and airy around her shoulders.

Forcing herself to speak in a normal tone she asked the cab driver, "Are you going to wait here for me?"

"No point in running clear back to town." Cassy felt herself relax a little. Somehow knowing that the cab was here waiting made her feel less vulnerable.

Mr. Landauer opened the door as soon as she knocked, like he was standing right behind it, waiting. He stood looking at her for at least a minute, frowning. "This is what you think is attractive?" His voice was sharp with impatience.

Cassy shrank from his gaze and stared down at the simple skirt and white blouse. "Um... I..." she stammered to a stop, her face crimson.

"Never mind, at least you look like a girl. Never could stand pants on a woman. Come in. Come in."

Halfway down the hall, he stopped abruptly and turned. Cassy was taken by surprise and almost bumped into him. He reached out and put a finger under her chin peering closely at her face. Cassy froze.

"This eye make up makes you look like a six year old who has been playing with her mother's make up. Wash it off." He pushed open a door to a bathroom. "Go on. We don't have all night."

Cassy was mortified. His tone left no options for objection. She stumbled into the bathroom and scrubbed roughly at her eyes with a washcloth and soap. She looked at herself in the mirror. The skin around her eyes was pink and swollen like she had been crying. She could feel her throat aching. It would be easy to burst into tears at any minute.

He was waiting in the hall and again he peered into her face. "Much better, you look much more attractive with your face clean." He patted her head in a strange gesture of approval. Cassy felt a stirring of happiness at this small reward. A tiny uncertain smile quivered briefly across her lips.

In the library, he pointed for her to sit in the kitchen chair. "Did you bring the books?"

"Yes sir." Cassy unzipped her backpack and pulled out the books. The lurid fairy tale came out and fell to the floor. His hand reached out and picked it up as she lunged for it.

He looked at the front cover, a picture of a nude woman with her breasts exposed. "Hmm... Whats this?"

"I am sorry sir... um... its a book I just picked up at the store. Um... its an... um... interpretation of a fairy tale." Cassy was stammering, her voice dwindling down to a whisper. She could feel her face on fire.

"Yes, it is. I am very familiar with it. How do you like it so far?"

"Its OK. I... I just started it." She squirmed in her chair.

He smiled, seeming to enjoy her discomfort. "You will have to tell me what you think once you are finished. Perhaps you could read it to me next." He handed the book to her.

Cassy could not imagine reading anything that sexually explicit out loud to anyone, but once again she was curiously reluctant to protest.

"Here are the books you asked me to bring you sir. I brought another book by Steinbeck that is sort of a sequel to Cannery Row. I thought if you had one you may as well have the set."

He turned the books over in his hands. "I am pleased you brought nicely bound editions. Too bad this one is paperback." He held up the book by Bradbury.

"I could order it in hard back but we only carried that in paperback."

"If I like it, I will have you get one."

Mr. Landauer handed her back the books. "Read the Steinbeck first." He handed her the book light and turned down the lights in the library.

Cassy loved that book. The world of Monterey and Mac and the boys filled her mind. The evening sped by.

Mr. Landauer stood, stretched and pulled out a pocket watch. He flipped up the face cover and ran his fingers over the hands. "Time for you to ride home."