Loraine's Self Bondage Re-Creation

The following is my re-creation of an event that happened a few years ago. I had been a sissy slave to Mistress Marie for over 2 decades during which I become a totally submissive slave to Her every desire. I think of Her often as She has passed now. While doing Self-Bondage activities shortly following Her passing my wild imagination conjures up the Mistress in my head and She takes charge. Any references to Mistress in the story are the imaginary Mistress controlling me.

This session was the last of the intense self-bondage sessions I had become so dependent upon. About 6 months after this session I was beginning to feel the desire to by dominant. My life's experience was that of the submissive but I was discovering that there are so many sissies out there that need a dominant in their life. I certainly had the life's experiences to give a masochistic sissy the session they lust for. My metamorphosis was complete in another 6 months and I had discovered the true joy of dominating a masochistic sissy slave. The rest is history.

Now here it is.

While surfing the Internet for pictures the other day I found a picture that brought back vivid memories of a day many years ago. This is a true story told as accurately as memory allows. I was locked in my Neosteel shemale chastity belt and garter belt with seamed stockings, a pair of 4" high heels, a sissy bra and waist cincher.

I was sitting at the computer preparing the document I am to use for this bondage. This document is being dictated by the Mistress in my head. Now, I am not normally permitted to know what my beloved Mistress is going to do, so Mistress has ordered me to forget what I have written as soon as I put the completed document in the envelope. My head was covered with a latex hood with eye holes and a pumped up breathers/feeding penis gag with the inflator removed from the built-in Schrader valve, so speech was just about impossible so I nodded in response.

Mistress informed me that I was to follow the instructions that would be sent by email to get ready. She also informed me that I had been under total surveillance for the last month or so. During that time a number of infractions had been documented and I was to be punished for them. Mistress loves latex and humiliating and tormenting Her sissy slave, so it was going to be an interesting Self-Bondage session.

I was standing there wondering what She caught me doing, or not doing. Was it the time I took off the high heels that hurt so much, or the time I was using a vibrator against my Neosteel chastity trying to get some relief for my incredible horniness. Oh my, what did She catch me for?

The email signal announced the arrival of the email.

I opened the email and was instructed to down load it directly into the word processer without reading it. It was properly paginated so that I could go from page to page when directed to do so. I loved these games and my clitty was throbbing in my Neosteel chastity. I printed the document and page one was on top. I stapled them together and looked at the first page.

Page 1 sent me to Mistress's Bathroom and under the sink was a large bag that was stapled closed. I was to take the bag, 2 - 18 inch spreader bars, the cloverleaf nipple clamps with the short connecting chain, the latex blindfold, a length of large link chain, snake bite cups, the 6 inch high heel shoes that are so painful, 7 matching locks with unique keys, and the handcuffs and go to the garage. It was February and cold, but the attached garage was probably 45-50 degrees inside.

I entered the garage and noticed a new full length mirror had been added with a narrow table perpendicular to the wall next to the mirror. I was instructed put everything I brought on the table and to stand in front of the mirror.

I was instructed to straighten the seams on my hose, tighten the garter straps and to remove my bra and waist cincher and place them on the table. Between every step I was to model in front of the mirror like a sexy sissy bitch. I just knew that Mistress was watching me as I did so I acted the part, I was a sexy sissy bitch slut!

The next instruction was to remove the shoes I was wearing and put on the 6 inch heels. I stood there in the shoes and strutted my best stuff. I was to pick up the snake bite cups and lube them and put them on each of my nipples. I was to open the large bag and remove the contents placing them on the table. When I opened the bag I found many sequentially numbered bags inside and lined them up on the table in numerical order.

Page 2 instructed me to open bag 1. I found a pair of heavy latex shoe locking straps and as instructed placed them on my feet and using 2 locks locked the ankle straps. Those shoes were not coming off until unlocked. Next, I was instructed to remove the snake bite cups, re-lube them and reinstall them. This step always caused my nipples to really get large from the suction.

Next was bag 2 which contained my favorite heavy black latex steel boned under bust corset. I was directed to go to the dungeon where my corset lacing helper is installed and put on my corset. This device is a wall mounted chain with an "S" hook attached. After I lace up the corset as tight as I can, I slip the "S" hook into the corset laces and lean forward using my body weight to tighten the corset laces. I am able to lace the corset very tight making my breathing shallow and bending over difficult!

I walked through the house with my chest proudly displayed with the snake bite cups starting to hurt from the suction. I went to the dungeon where I have a chain with a large smooth hook on one end and the other end attached to a ceiling eyebolt.

By this time I believed that Mistress was watching. I imagined Her in the second floor guestroom engaged in all manner of foreplay with one of Her stud lovers watching sissy slut me on the large screen. It seems that all my submissive behavior had Her stud all hot and eager. All this imagery running through my sissy brain had my clitty rock hard in my Neosteel, I was breathing heavy and very horny!

I walked over to the corset lacer and stood proudly. I removed each snake bite cup from my already much enlarged nipples, already leaking white fluid, and re-lubed each one and reapplied them. My nipples would soon be almost enlarged so they reached to the end of the snake bite cups.

I loosened the laces on the corset and placing it around me hooked the 6 front busk hooks. I pulled the laces as tight as I could and stepping next to the helper I inserted the hook into the laces and leaned forward using my body weight to draw the laces closed. It took many cycles, but the corset was closed at the back and the latex was stretched very tightly around me. My waist was the smallest I had seen in years and breathing was labored. I wrapped the laces around my waist and finally tied them in a big bow with a double knot at the small of my back.

I strutted around the dungeon looking at myself in the mirrors very pleased with the sensual small waist and I loved the way the corset pushed up my breast meat so the snake bite cups were tilted upward. I looked at the figure with the latex hood and corset, with the garter belt and seamed hose with painfully high shoes locked on my feet. I looked very erotic and my clitty was throbbing in the Neosteel as I headed back to the garage.

Page 3 instructed me to put an 18-inch spreader bar at my ankles and above my knees. Now, the corset did not permit much movement to work on putting a spreader bar between my ankles. I am sure Mistress was smiling at me struggling with this difficult task. I struggled and found myself on my knees reaching back to close the leather straps with the slots over the u-shaped steel loop and finally closing a lock to secure it. It must have taken 15-20 minutes of struggling to get the spreader locked between my ankles. I was breathing heavy from all the exertion.

The knee spreader was a lot easier as I was able to put it in place and squeeze my legs closed to hold it. I could slide my hand down the side of my thigh and close the leather strap and put on the lock. Finally, sweating profusely under my corset and hood the spreader bars were in place. I was breathing heavily and the air whistled through the penis gag and nose holes in the hood. I was glad that this hood had the larger nose holes.

I stood proudly in front of the mirror and the instructions were to pull the snake bite cups off and put the clover leaf nipple clamps on my swollen nipples with the jaws closed on the top and bottoms of the nipples. I pulled the snake bite cups and they released with a large "pop". My nipples were very swollen and the snake bite clamps had to be opened wide and my nipple squashed a little so the jaws would go almost an inch over my nipples. The nipple clamps were standing out from my body angled up a little with the chain hanging in a gentle arc. I was amazed by the amount of nipple flesh in the jaws of the clamps and the pain was already beginning.

Page 4 instructed me to open bag 3. Bag three contained the key to my Neosteel chastity belt and a spiked parachute ball stretcher. In large bold fully capitalized print I was warned not to fondle my clitty after the chastity belt was removed or the penalty would be a painful branding on the end of my clitty. I cringed at the thought of a hot branding iron disfiguring my clitty and shuddered at the thought.

The instructions directed me to remove the chastity belt immediately placing my hands behind my head and modeling in front of the mirror. My clitty was suddenly very hard and erect and I placed my hands behind my head and fought the urge to grab my clitty and masturbate. I slowly turned and tried to look sexy. Soon I had my urges under control and went to the next step. I was to put the spiked parachute ball stretcher on, which I did. I could feel the pin pricks immediately.

Next I was to lock a length of chain to the "D" ring on the spreader between my ankles. I knelt and reaching behind me was able to close the lock attaching a chain to my ankle spreader. I stood up holding the chain and read the next step. The chain was to be passed behind my knee spreader and locked to the loops at the ends of the straps on the spiked parachute ball stretcher. But I must half squat first and then lock the chain to the spiked parachute ball stretcher. This left me standing with my legs bent unable to stand straight up because the chain was taut and pulling on the spiked parachute ball stretcher.

Next was bag number 4. I found a long, narrow wire cock trap. One of those things made from stainless steel wire that worked like a finger trap. One of those things you push your finger into and pull and it tightens around your fingers. There was also a heavy latex posture collar in the bag that buckled with 3 straps. I was to put on the collar first and soon my head was immobile. I pushed the wire cock trap over my hard clitty until it was touching my balls. I pulled it and the stainless steel wires squeezed tightly and I had diamond shaped clitty flesh bulging out of the stainless meshed tube. I was to take the last lock and scrunching my shoulders over and leaning forward pull the wire cock trap until it could be locked to the chain between my nipple clamps.

I had now placed myself in a very uncomfortable bondage from which there was no escape without the keys. I couldn't stand straight and had to stand with my legs bent, I couldn't pull my shoulders back or the wire cock trap would tighten and so would the clover nipple clamps on my very sensitive nipples. I was in a real fix and I was sure the cramps would soon get me.

I imagined Mistress with Her stud giggling at my helpless bondage. His face buried in Her pussy making Her cum over and over. All while I was on the big screen trying to figure out how to stand without pain.

I picked up page 5 and was instructed to open bag 5. In the bag was a double enema nozzle with a long hose attached. I twisted as best I could and finally after much cock, ball and nipple torment got the end in my ass and inflated both bladders. There I was bent over and helpless with a hose from them hanging from my sissy ass. I looked around and saw the enema bag hanging at the center of the garage, the hose held closed by a solenoid attached with a long wire to a laptop computer. I also noticed the keys, all 7 of them on a ring hanging from a magnetic holder connected with another wire to the computer.

The tight corset was no help and the unnatural position was torturous. I read page 6 and couldn't believe my eyes. I was instructed to push the enter key on the laptop and move to the center of the garage where the 3 quart enema bag was hanging. It was filled with Mistresses special coffee blend. I connected the hose from the bag to the hose from the inflatable enema nozzle. I looked at the last instruction again and placed the latex blindfold over my head just above my eyes, the handcuffs on my left wrist with the keyhole facing toward my hands. As instructed I reached up and pulled on the white string as instructed.

I pulled and pulled and finally I had the bungee cord stretched tight and I removed the white string and inserted the extra long nose hook into my nose. As the stress in my nose started I pulled the blindfold over my eyes and reached behind me and closed the handcuffs over my right wrist.

I was in the most painful and stressful Self-Bondage in my life. My feet ached from the shoes, my balls were being assaulted by a pincushion, my clitty was stretched and feeling the pain of the wire mesh, the wires were cutting deeply in my clitty flesh and my poor nipples were squashed and pulled and in serious pain. My body was helplessly posed in an awkward half squat hunched over position with my nose being pulled and distorted; the hook could not come out because my head could not tip back. I was in misery and incredible pleasure all at once.

I imagined Mistress engaged in some incredibly hot sex as they watched me suffer. I heard the loud "CLICK" as the hose was released from the grip of the clamp. The enema rushed into me. Three quarts filled me and I was having trouble keeping my balance and my nose was being seriously abused.

The tight corset made the enema horrible. Cramps hit me over and over and fought to keep my balance. The coffee had me wired and I knew if I fell I would seriously hurt my nose. The computer had been programmed to release the enema between 20 and 30 minutes after starting the timer, and the key drop sometime between 45 and 90 minutes. I was sweating profusely begging for early release from my self-bondage. The time dragged on and I was shaking from the stress of the bondage.

I heard the click and felt the keys bounce off my arm. It took a very long time, probably only 10 minutes, but it seemed like forever before I finally got the handcuffs off and removed the torturous nose hook! The enema hose was clamped off and I was free of the empty enema bag.

I waddled over to the table to read the last page of my session. I was ordered to remove the nipple clamps and lock the trap on my clitty to the corset laces so the trap remained tight on my clitty. I could at least stand with my shoulders back as the pain in my nipples exploded the instant the clamps were removed.

I opened the last bag and found several size 109 large rubber bands. I was soon putting a rubber band around me. I screamed nooooooooooooo into my gagged mouth, as I realized what I must do to please the strict sadistic Mistress in my head. The wide rubber band was placed so it was directly over my swollen and very sore nipples.

I stretched the rubber band until it was pulled as far as my arms could. Mistress screamed in my ear to let go and I did. Both nipples exploded in searing pain at the same time. I gasped, screamed into my gag and couldn't catch my breath. I repositioned the rubber band and did it again and I was jumping and pulling my poor balls trying to escape the white hot pain. I did it three more times! There were 5 awesome welts across my sissy chest that passed over my nipples. Mistress will be very proud.

I released the chain from the parachute ball harness and finally stood erect. I was ordered to remove the ball harness and the cock trap and immediately lock myself back into my Neosteel chastity. There I was locked in my chastity over my corset; the enema was the only thing I could think of. I begged Mistress and She allowed me to waddle to the bathroom and release the enema.

I sat there for the longest time.

Mistress told me to put on the latex bra with "F" breast forms and come in to the front room. These huge breast forms have a coarse fabric liner that Mistress glued to them many years ago when She was still alive. She loved how tender my nipples got when I wore them, because She said a sissy should know what tender nipples are like.

I walked into the front room with giant tits, incredibly small waist and those evil 6 inch heels. Strut like a whore you sissy bitch, She said as I tried to walk and shake my ass and tits. My nipples screaming at the new torment!

I knelt on the floor and Mistress interrogated me about my TG/CD ordeal and I admitted that I was very turned on when I had put myself into inescapable and very uncomfortable bondage. I confessed that I liked it when I learned that it turned Mistress on and gave Her pleasure. I was very surprised at how I created such severe bondage and how helpless I was.

I loved wearing my latex corset and I loved the Mistress in my head for inflicting this painful experience on me. Mistress ordered me to spend the next 4 hours dressed as the slut I am surfing for pictures and stories that get me aroused. Mistress loves me all aroused and locked in my Neosteel, horny and helpless, and my nipples suffering incredibly!

Finally I was allowed to shower and dress in my silken pajamas. As I lay in bed gently massaging my incredibly sore nipples and rubbing the Neosteel, I reminisce the time when I was bound this way for real. I replay in my head how I put myself in this Self-Bondage and my clitty swells in my Neosteel as I am aroused. My Self-Bondage attempt was very much like the time when Mistress was alive, intense, painful, made sissy cry, but sadly not the same.

Following this session my journey took a big turn and my metamorphosis from masochistic submissive to sadistic Dominant had begun!