Elly Learns to Submit

Kelly shifted in her seat. Days dragged on at the drab little state office, the mundane list of tasks and paperwork and gray coworkers flickering in the fluorescent light. There would be more of the same at home tonight: dinner, soccer games, bath time, and then appointment television with Scott on the same damned couch in the same damned living room for the last 15 years. Order, sameness: She was Kelly in Charge from the time the lights went on in the morning until they went off at night.

The new job was killing her, as were her duties at home. Scott deferred everything to her: the kids' punishments, vacations, financial decisions - even what groceries came into her house were up to her. At night her head spun with checklists of to-dos. Kelly couldn't remember the last time she had a decent night's sleep.

She checked the clock: Only 5 minutes left before she went to him.

She wasn't even sure that she knew his name.

There was William, the name he used in their email exchanges, but who knows whether that was real. There was his screen name on the website where she found him. Since they started exchanging messages he insisted on being called Sir, and she was fine with that - better than fine. Every time she typed the word she felt a rush of pleasure run through her body. With Sir there would be no drab little mundane tasks.

The first time she met she was disappointed. "You're so mild-mannered," she said.

"What were you expecting, some Daddy Dom in a leather cap?" he smiled.

"You're just so mild-mannered. I mean, why do you think that you're dominant?" Kelly asked.

"What do you think dominant is?" William said.

"I don't know. I guess I expected a guy in a suit who would grab me by the arm and push me up against the wall and take me from behind."

"We're in a sushi restaurant," he laughed. "Maybe we should just stick to lunch."

"I mean, you're nice and everything, but you're not what I expected."

"You've been reading too many books," William said.

Kelly planned on breaking off contact after that, but even if he wasn't a Dom she enjoyed William's emails. He was funny and nice. Hearing from him broke up the day. And now here she was a month later, meeting him again.

She parked her SUV behind the hotel and made her way to the lobby. "Excuse me," she said, and she gave the desk clerk her name. "Do you have an envelope for me?" On the elevator she tore it open, found the room key and a note from William:

"Miss Kelly: You will enter the room quietly. You will remove your clothes and hang them in the armoire near the door. You will kneel on the left side of the bed, facing the window. Do not look around, keep facing the window. Do your job well, precious. Make your Sir proud." She could feel the wetness trickle into her panties.

There's something about a presence in a room. The suite was dark but for the city lights pouring through the big window. She couldn't see a thing in the room, yet she could feel that he was there. The door closed behind her, and she stepped out of her work shoes. The marble entryway felt cool against her stockinged feet. She fumbled with the buttons on her blouse, her fingers not quite as convinced that this was a good idea as her libido was. The silk top slipped from her shoulders, nipples erect beneath her sheer bra. She unclasped it and let it fall to the floor.

She stepped out of her skirt. Should she leave her panties and stockings on? She wore them just to please him, but the note said to disrobe. Kelly hesitated then slid the black thong down her thighs, the crotch glistening from her excitement, and there she stood - nude in a near stranger's hotel room. She shivered, more from the embarrassment of being exposed like this than anything, but she did as her Sir instructed and paced across the darkened room, found her spot beside the bed and kneeled. Maybe she'd finally get the rope and the whips that she fantasized about after reading her erotic stories.

How long she kneeled there she didn't know. Her legs and back ached, but she was determined to please him. She looked straight ahead as instructed. The red light from a radio tower blinked outside the window: on/off/on/off. Kelly fell into its rhythm, a visual song distracting her from the pain.

And then she heard him stir on the bed above her, felt the mattress move and heard his sigh as he stood. She straightened her back and felt her hands trembling on her thighs. Footsteps, the sound of a drawer opening. Finally, her submissive fantasies would be realized. The red light flickered: on/off/on/off. Kelly heard him approaching from behind, felt his breath on her neck as his big hands tied something around her waist.

"Stand up, pet," William whispered. Her legs and feet tingled as the blood rushed back into them. He rubbed her hips gently. "What's around your waist, precious?"

"Is this an apron, Sir?"

"Why are you wearing an apron, Miss Kelly?"

"I don't know, Sir."

"You are such a sweet girl," William said. "Go stand in front of the window, precious. Go on, do your task."

"The curtains are open, Sir."

"Yes, they are. Go do your task." She didn't move. She couldn't move. "Why are you here, Miss Kelly?"

"I don't know. To serve you, Sir."

"Then why won't you?"

"The curtains are open, Sir."

"Are you afraid?"

"Yes, Sir."

William's hands remained on her hips. He leaned forward and kissed her neck. She felt him pressing into the small of her back. "I'm sorry, pet. No one can see you, we are too high up. You are safe, but you are not in charge. Do you understand?"

"Yes, sir," she said, and she did. It made no sense but she felt safer in that moment than she ever did with Scott.

"Place your hands on the desk, pet," William said, and when she did he pulled her hips away from the little table. She jumped when his palm met her bare cheek, but there was no pain, just shock. He slapped her ass again, and again. The stinging set in. She winced, but she remained silent but for one small cry.

"Why are you here, Miss Kelly?"

"To serve you, Sir," she said. She heard him walk away, but she did not remove her palms from the table. Behind her she heard the clatter of ice cubes, the trickle of liquid spilling from a bottle. More time passed.

"You may go stand in front of the window now," he said.

"Yes, Sir." He was right: There was no way that she could be seen from that height, but the thrill of being exposed to the world made her even wetter. Lights flickered in distant windows - office workers, apartment dwellers, people like Scott who were content wasting their nights in front of televisions. "May I speak, Sir?"

"You may."

"Is this all?" Kelly asked. "I mean, it's great, but don't you want me to do anything?"

"You are doing something," William said.

"I'm just standing."

She heard him set the glass down, and then the heavy footsteps coming toward her. "Is that all you're doing?" William said. He grabbed her hands and placed them on the glass, kicked her feet until she was spread eagled like a suspect. She heard the distinct sound of a zipper, felt the fleshy hardness press against her folds.

"Oh, fuck," she said. "Thank you, Sir," but she was too quick. William pulled away without penetrating her.

"Why are you here?" he asked again.

She began to cry. "I don't know anymore. From our emails I thought we were going to fuck. I just wanted to fuck somebody who wasn't boring and inadequate for a change. I just wanted to be wanted."

"That's not what you wanted. Be honest," William said.

"I don't know," she cried. "I don't know what you want."

"That's not what I asked, pet. Why are you here?"

"Because I'm tired," she cried. "I'm tired of everybody coming to me with everything. I'm tired of being the one who has to return things to the store because my husband isn't man enough to stand up to the manager. I'm tired of everybody expecting me to have the answers every fucking minute of every fucking day. I just wanted to be somewhere for a little while where I didn't have to think, solve, do, where I didn't have to be in control. Can't I just be not me for a little while? Can't I just be something else?"

He turned her around and took her face in his hands. "I think you get it now," William said, and he kissed her. "Come on, pet, let's lie down for a little bit." They collapsed onto the bed, her face buried in her Sir's chest, and she fell happily to sleep for the first time in months.