After Joe was gone I put on a silk robe and dried my hair. When I walked into the living room I saw the book lying on the coffee table. I carried it to bed with me to read. When I read the table of contents, I was surprised that it didn't have a guide to whips and chains. I guess Joe was right when he said BDSM is much more than that. In the section on Dominant qualities, I wasn't surprised to see characteristics that he possesses. The phrase that caught my eye stated that a Dominant must have control of his own life before he can attempt to control his submissive.
I turned to the submissive section and read for a bit. Everything I read was clicking with me. I have always been a caring, nurturing and loving person that enjoys pleasing others. The different thing about submissiveness within a BDSM relationship is that actions by the submissive are predominantly rewards for the Dominant. The book oozed of the give and take philosophy. I thought all good relationships were that way, this just so happened to be about BDSM.
I looked at pictures of submissive poses, bondage and other things, like some of the art in the club. Some people live the lifestyle 24/7, while others only live it behind closed doors. I knew as I read about submissiveness that Laura, John and Joe were right about me. I do have those characteristics. Now I guess I will have to see if I have the qualities that Joe enjoys and vice versa, with him as a Dominant. The book was completely overwhelming with many different and varied ways to do things, so I just stuck to reading about the fundamentals.
Sometime later, I caught myself drifting off but didn't want to put the book down. I knew if I read in this condition, I probably wouldn't remember much, so I marked the page and put the book down for the night. I set my alarm for work, turned off the light and settled into bed for the night.
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In the middle of the night I woke in a sweat with a very vivid dream in the forefront of my mind. Apparently the pictures in the book and the reading had evoked images in my mind coupled with spending time with Joe that day. In my dream I was kneeling, naked in a submissive pose. Joe stood before me in all his glory. Black leather pants hugged his strong muscular legs and thighs. His bare chest was magnificent. He reached to touch the top of my head. He said things to me but I couldn't remember them from the dream. I just knew the things he was saying were nice and comforting toward me.
He summoned me to rise and follow him. After he sat in a chair he had me kneel in front of him again. Patting his leg, I knew to lay my head there. He stroked my hair and spoke to me further. He pulled a box from somewhere in my hazy dream and opened it in front of me. It was a collar made of pearls with a large black onyx medallion. He told me it signified our union of black and white. The pearls were small and the black onyx medallion was larger to signify his Dominance. He pointed to the pearls and told me they each signified a quality in me that he loved or desired. He told me the one and only piece of black onyx signified that he would be the only Master in my life. He held it before me, asking my acceptance of him in this way. That is when I woke up in a sweat.
I guess the book made more of an impact on me than I realized. I looked at the clock. It was 6:00am, so I decided to get up early and start my day. After a shower, I dressed and prepared for work. All morning I was haunted by the dream.
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When I arrived at work Laura was her usual happy self, while I seemed somewhat distracted in my remembrances.
"Did you read the book yet?"
"Yes, I read some of it before I went to bed."
"And?"
"I have to say, you were right when you told me I am submissive. I could really relate to a lot of the submissive material in the book. Not just the qualities, but the feelings and emotions of submissives."
"See, I told you Sue."
"Yeah, I know."
"So what's wrong?"
"Nothing, I just had a dream last night that I can't get out of my mind."
"What about?"
"Joe."
"OH! Care to share?"
"Not right now. I need to get to work. Maybe later."
"Ok, I need to get busy too."
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Joe arrived at work. John was at the coffee pot when he walked in.
"Hey Joe, Good morning."
"Morning John."
"I'd ask if you had a good weekend, but I think I already know."
"It was a lot to take in, for one weekend."
"Yeah, especially since you have been out of the loop for a while."
"Thanks for introducing me to Sue."
"I didn't introduce you. You found her on your own."
"I know, but you set it up to happen and I'm glad."
"Good, I thought you might hit it off together."
"Oh, we hit it off alright."
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah." He paused a moment. "I need to get to my office. Catch ya later."
John stood there feigning rejection. "What, no details?"
Joe spoke over his shoulder, "You know I don't kiss and tell."
John laughed and went to his office. Joe arrived at his desk. It felt like he had left it a week ago because so much had happened in the last two days. Automatically he pulled things from his desk to work. Having done his job for so long it was like he worked on autopilot. The draft he worked on laid there while his mind drifted. He recalled seeing Sue the first time in the club. She looked radiant in a black dress and heels with brunette hair cascading over her shoulders in soft waves. She wasn't thin but she wasn't overly big, nor was she too tall or too short. She was just right, with padding in all those good places, just like he likes. He knew that looks weren't everything. He had met several women that were very beautiful but they couldn't carry on an intelligent conversation if their life depended on it.
Remembering the moment he approached her, he thought of her eyes when she looked at him. Her dark brown, almond shaped eyes smiled at him without words. In the depth of her eyes he saw so much... wisdom, caring and a love for life. He remembered thinking that she looked like a minx, full of life. He wasn't disappointed when they spoke because their conversation rolled ahead, of its own accord. For her exuberance of loving life she still had a charming quality about her, instead of being brassy.
The next thing he remembered was seeing her on Sunday, in her bikini. She wasn't the skinniest woman there but damn she was hot in her own way. He purposely started a conversation with Nancy to see how she reacted. He despised jealousy and was glad that she didn't throw a temper tantrum when he spoke to another woman. Even if they weren't officially a couple yet, he needed to know little things like that before he would take that leap.
Then he thought of the study. He hoped and prayed when they were finally together in a sexual manner, that the size of his cock wouldn't chase her away. A person can really have too much of a good thing, which he knew full well.
Although he was average in length, the girth of him was more than the majority of women he had been with, could take without extreme pain. He really wanted her in all ways, but he knew the reality if he was too big for her. Their relationship would end, just like the others had. He felt parts of his body voluntarily joining him in his remembrance and thought it best to push it to the back of his mind and get to work.
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I sat at my desk and started inputting the data in front of me in a robotic fashion. My fingers did one task, while my mind did another. I remembered standing in the club looking at some art when I first heard a voice, deep and calmly he said hello. I remember turning to see him for the first time. He was ruggedly handsome with dark brown/black eyes that looked right through me.
His clean-shaven black head made me want to reach out and touch him there for a reason that I couldn't explain. He had a brilliant smile that wasn't overly wide, but more casual. I had to look up at him because he was about a foot taller. He was dressed modestly but nice in a crisp pressed, pale yellow shirt and black silk slacks. I felt a bit odd being in a BDSM club meeting him, wondering what he thought of me. He was chivalrous when it came time for me to go into the viewing room, which put me at ease. But after the viewing I wanted to go find him, rip his slacks and shirt off, and release the pent up emotions inside me. He coolly and calmly pushed me away in my heightened state, which surprised me, but pleased me. It told me a lot about his character.
I remembered seeing him at the pool in his black swim trunks. His body was chiseled and sculptured in all the right places. I never wondered if he found me appealing for some reason, I just knew he did without so many words. It felt good to be accepted as I am. When he talked to Nancy I enjoyed watching him interact with someone else. I wanted to see if he acted the same with other women as he did with me, or if he acted differently. I noticed he laughed more with Nancy, but later I noticed he laughed when he was talking with other men also. I chalked it up to his making conversation and laughing at their comments. When he was around me he seemed more astute and serious, even though we also had our moments of laughter.
I gathered up more papers to input, while I continued reliving the weekend. When he came to the study it was so overwhelming. When he made me squirt I knew he was special. I hate to say it but it's like we were meant for one another in that respect. I have had my share of encounters and that is just something that has never happened. I also have such a desire to be completely filled; I have gently turned away many a beau, telling them that we just weren't compatible. In reality their mediocre sized cocks could never satisfy that hunger in me. I felt his cock through his swim trunks in the study. It was hard to be sure but it was difficult to tell if it was big enough to satisfy me. The fact that he made me come without it was wonderful, but I knew I would need both.
