"You want me to lend you a hundred and fifty for a week? Now why would I want to do that?"
Stephanie had broached the subject when I dropped past for a visit. I'd promised my sister that I'd stop by and see how she was settling into her new house and see if there were any little jobs that required a man's touch. There usually is when you move house.
I had to do a few things that gave me a chance to feel like a real he-man, like changing a couple of washers and climbing on chairs to replace some light-bulbs, but nothing too strenuous was required.
Stephanie had given me a cup of coffee as way of thanks and then hit me for a loan. If I thought that my sister knew she wanted a loan and sent me round deliberately I'd give her a mouthful.
Stephanie was all earnest and pleading, swearing she'd pay it back the next week, but there were a few things she needed and she really couldn't wait until next week to get them.
"Please, Ashley," she said, smiling prettily. "It's only a hundred and fifty, and I get my bonus from Social Services on the fourteenth. That's five hundred dollars and I'll be able to pay you back without any problems at all."
"It's only a hundred and fifty, true, but it's my hundred and fifty. If memory serves me correctly, you don't have the greatest reputation for paying back loans."
That last was a hinted reminder of a fifty I'd 'lent' her about a year ago. I never did see that fifty again, and didn't really want to be stiffed for a hundred and fifty. It's not that I couldn't afford it, it was the principle of the thing.
I considered the matter, dubious about the chance of getting my money back, but weighing that against the fact that she probably really did need it. I just knew I was going to give her the money and probably be stiffed, but she was a friend of the family and it's not as though she was asking for a thousand or so. Still, I like to feel I have some control about what's going on.
"OK," I said with a sigh. "I'll let you have it, but it's to be paid back on the fourteenth, with no excuses."
Stephanie sparked up, all smiles. She'd got her way and things would be a little easier for her until her Social Security bonus came through.
"That won't be a problem," she assured me. "I'll have the money on the fourteenth without fail. Word of honour."
"It won't be your word that suffers if you don't, but your bottom. I'm reserving the right to put you across my knee and paddle your backside if you renege on this."
"That's fine," she said, dismissing the threat away airily. "I'll have the money, so you won't need to get stroppy."
I just smiled at her and reached for my wallet. She might just wave the threat off but I strongly suspected that, come the fourteenth, she would be bent over my knee, bottom glowing in the sunshine.
I rocked up on the evening of the fourteenth, and Stephanie appeared surprised to see me. She invited me in and we talked about mutual friends for a while, while she gave me some coffee. After we'd finished our coffee I casually mentioned it was the fourteenth.
Stephanie looked puzzled, as though she was wondering what that had to do with things.
I put in in simple words for her.
"One hundred and fifty dollars. A loan. Payable on the fourteenth from your Social Services bonus."
Stephanie's face fell.
"I'm sorry," she said quietly. "I thought Carole would've passed the message on to you. I got my month wrong. My bonus doesn't come until next month, and they won't pay it early. I've already asked."
My beloved sister had certainly not passed any message onto me, and I strongly doubted that Stephanie had actually given her one. This was the first excuse, designed to give her a month's grace. Other excuses would follow until I gave it up as a bad job.
Wasn't it lucky that I had a fall-back plan?
"That's OK," I said smiling. "Where do you want your spanking? In here or in the bedroom? We'll probably be more comfortable in the bedroom."