My husband Will is a wonderful man. We have been married 10 years and he has always been my hero. He makes sure I am safe and loved and cherished. He is my rock. Which is in part what makes my behaviour last night even harder to think about. I wince as I recall what I did. I KNOW he is going to punish me for it... his strong hands never miss an opportunity to spank my naughty behind, usually for play and our mutual gratification. But this time it will be different. This is going to be the hardest spanking of my life, if I know my husband. And I do. This is a lesson he is not going to let me forget.
Will is in the kitchen right now, reading a news update. He instructed me to have a shower and to come downstairs wearing a dress and no panties. As I descend the stairs I can see he has made me a cup of coffee and light breakfast. He motions to the food in a no-nonsense manner. Sometimes I forgo breakfast... but certainly not today it seems. I glance at my husbands handsome features while I eat my toast. He seems furious... but also solemn. I eat in silence and look to him hoping my sincere expression of guilt will soften him. It does not.
Soon he is taking my plate and cup to place it in the dishwasher. He takes a glass of water and places it in front of me.
I notice his hand rubs the small of my back. Maybe he isn't so mad? I hope.
'Did you sleep well?' He asks.
'Yes... yeah really good actually' I smile, trying to remain light and positive.
'You must've needed it after all your exertions last night.' There it is, that stern look returns to his face.
His hand moves lower to pat my bottom.
'I want you standing in the middle of the room naked as soon as you're finished with the water, understood?'
I nod. His eyes follow me as I follow his instructions. He sits on the lounge as I face him. Naked with no where to hide.
'Isabel, you know why you're in this position?'
I sigh and shift my eyes away from his. He knows this is one of the hardest parts for me. To verbalise what I did. I swallow hard.
'Y-yes Sir.'
'Tell me, why are you getting punished?'
'I got carried away last night... I lied to you and took MDMA and then I drove home.. late Sir'.
He looks like he is furious and could be sick with anguish at hearing the retelling of events.
'That's right. Tell me, what is my policy on drugs?'
'That they are unsafe'
'And you knew last night how worried and upset I would be that you took that pill, true?'
'Yes Sir...' I squeak.
He looks at me sternly, his eyes brooking no argument.
'Speaking of safety, it was within our rules, the ones you agreed to, that you would never do anything to jeopardise your safety. What part of ingesting a pill at a bar where you were already drunk before DRIVING home sounds like it is aligned with our rules?'
'None if it Sir..' I lower my eyes.
'What else did you agree to as part of our respect and care for each other, Issy?'
My voice is shaky. 'To always communicate to each other honestly, Sir'.
Will's eyes narrow. 'And I'm assuming that we both agree that you trying to hide the fact that you took a pill last night was breaking our rule?'
'Yes Sir... I'm so sorry'.
Will looks at me with his steely blue eyes, assessing how deeply I regret my actions. I think about how silly I was to try and hide the fact that I took a pill from him last night. This is especially true considering Will is a physician with experience working in the Emergency Department of our local hospital. He is trained to assess for signs of different drug use, so he was never going to be fooled. Not to mention that he hates drugs and has seen too many families hurt by the consequences of DUI's and MVA fatalities. He had every right to be angry. And I knew it last night when I took the pill and got into my car that he would be pissed. Hence the lie and attempt to cover up what I'd done. But in my sobriety this morning I felt like I'd acted like a stupid little teenager, not a 38 year old woman.
Will seemed almost sympathetic as his eyes met mine. I knew he could see my remorse, he could always see how I felt or what I was thinking when he looked at me like that. But then his cool demeanour returned and I could see him harden himself for the task ahead... with fierce determination.
He stood, took my arm in his grip and led me over to the couch before expertly placed me over his lap, making sure to secure me with his leg.
'How many do you think your naughty bottom deserves?'
I sink into him and say nothing. He lands the first blow sharply and I whimper.