Being slutty on the internet sometimes leads to beautiful moments.
We started talking on a Dollification Discord server. Even played a couple times before and it was ok but once we introduced bladder control and desperation play, it just clicked.
He would build the feeling of desperation in me even before I started to drink. Setting up triggers that made me drink water without being aware of it. We messed with the ability to tell the difference between real and simulated desperation. Each bit of play rolling into the other. Pushed to desperation and begging and agreeing to meet in person, anything for permission to burst.
The night he used my desperation to get me to agree to a date he woke me from trance and tied full awareness to his permission for me to pee. I woke up bursting with an overwhelming wave of delicious relief.
"You absolutely evil fucker!! What was that? Such a mindfuck. Haha thank you and fuck you. That was a trip. You don't even know what that desperation is like, it's so intense you can't...uuuunnff. Also I'm nervous and looking forward to our date this weekend."
"Wear something you can walk around the city in all day, I'll make the plans. And we'll end up at one of my favourite dive bars to hear this band I have been into recently. Stay hydrated and I'll touch in tomorrow."
Choosing what to wear for a day of squirming is a game of self inflicted predicaments. I show up in ripped up light jeans and an old cropped local pickle logo tee. I clock him coming out of his train and feel frozen as I watch him walk over. I shake myself and give a little wave as he approaches. He smiles and holds his arms out for a hug, cocking his head in question. I nod and he steps into me. Smooth. The hug is powerful. Contact all the way down my body. Close. Strong.
"DESPERATE"
His lips brush my ear and he holds me tighter as I squirm in desperation. It feels so real. I want to hit him. I kiss him instead.
Moaning "please."
"You are going to say that so many more times tonight, slut"
Chuckles, "RELIEF"
I sag in his arms
"Good toy"
I laugh and push him away playfully, fake outrage to hide the wildly beating heart and very real arousal.
He hands me a bottle of water and snaps his fingers. I take a big drink of water and wonder why he is looking at me like he has already won.
"Lets go"
He grabs my hand in his. It's big and cool and I know mine feels clammy in his. He squeezes "I've got you"
We head out, the chatting and flirting is cute and I am trying to keep my balance, mentally.
We go to an old bookstore and browse. Reading blurbs to each other in exaggerated voices. He comes up behind me when my head is down reading the back of a paperback in the mystery section. Slips his arms around me and loops thumbs into my front belt loops.
"DESPERATE" he growls into my ear. Holding me through the initial shiver as a wave of desperation hits me. "You better learn how to HOLD some composure while being a stupidly desperate slut. The next time I trigger you, you'll have to catch yourself. Or not. I get a show either way. Actually let's practice right now."
He checks over his shoulders and takes a step back, leaving me squirming in front of him. His eyes devour my embarrassed desperation, each little squirm. He breathes in my little whimper
"Please" I beg
He steps back into me and runs his hand up my thigh. "RELIEF"
"Oh my god, fuck you"
"Watch your mouth today, my messy little toy. I had planned a day of silly teasing but I can definitely be absolutely cruel to you if you want a reason to swear"
I gulp and try to compose myself as a wave of need flows through me that has everything to do with a life of villain fantasies.
"I-I understand." I kind of shake myself out of his little spell "I'm fucked aren't I" I laugh.
"So fucking badly" He laughs with me and pulls me in for a kiss and walks out of this stack, snapping before turning the corner. I knew that I'd have to be careful about what I drank if I was going to survive today, I thought as I took a long pull on the water bottle I found in my bag.
Sitting in the park, snapping to punctuate the conversation.
"DESPERATE" He sits back and watches me squirm in the grass. Leaving me there momentarily when he runs off to fill his water bottle for what somehow seems like the second time. Coming back to me grinding into the grass and whimpering on the edge of pleasure and pain.
"RELIEF"
Pulling us into an alley after getting ice cream,
"DESPERATE". He steps back to watch me squirm in the middle of the alley. Encouraging me to moan and beg, no one is listening.
"RELIEF"
Into a dive bar, a loud pop punk band playing in the back. Our last stop of the night. In the moments when I wasn't being triggered through the day we had really connected. Vibing on each other's weirdnesses. I was mostly happy he had kept the desperation simulated so we could enjoy the show together, the villain fetishist part was perpetually disappointed. I knew there was intensity to come but I was also excited to see a band that he was into. Date vibes. I wanted to make out with him on the dance floor.
He buys us beers and winks as he orders me a water as well. The beer comes first and he lifts it to toast.
"To villains" I lifted my bottle enthusiastically!
We had been joking about this in the park. Clinking his and following his big sip. I had been good at not getting a drink when we got ice cream, this was ok.
The water arrives and I laugh and cock an eye at him. Dipping my middle finger into the glass and stirring it around, I pull it out and suck it dry. Flipping him off with a giggle. Snap. Big drink of water.
"Thanks for trusting me with today, you're a really fun toy to play with" he said, knocking my elbow with his.
I blushed but let out a laugh and looked up "Thanks! You too...I mean I like how you play with me... good technique."
Snap Snap Snap
I chugged my water.
"This band is great, let's get back there."
The first set is great. The dance floor is full. All the jumping had us both sweaty. Dancing with each other to the music was electric. Falling for him as he loudly sings along. Drinking.
