I still remember the day when everything changed.
It was a Saturday in early November. The weather was shit -- cold and rainy -- but our fridge was empty. I knew Jackie wouldn't want to go out in the rain and she was still sleeping in anyway. It was the weekend after all; her policy was to sleep in. Sometimes we'd go grocery shopping together, but I liked surprising her. I loved spoiling her.
It was nearly noon by the time I got back. I could hear music playing from the bedroom; I assumed she was probably taking a shower. As I headed into the kitchen, grocery bags rustling about my legs, I paused as I set them down on our kitchen counter as two things slowly occurred to me. I didn't hear the telltale sound of the shower in use, but I did hear her soft moans coming from our bedroom.
My cock twitched as my imagination barrelled ahead on its own. There have been a few occasions when I came home and found her playing with herself. I loved secretly watching, I found it so sensual to see the way she enjoyed herself...and then I'd join in the fun when I couldn't stand it anymore.
I walked to our bedroom quietly, silently inching down the short hallway before carefully peering around the corner at our bed. As my eyes adjusted to the dim lighting, the excited voyeur in me looked on eagerly, impatient to take in every detail while lurking in the shadows. By the time I could regret taking in the scene before me, it was too late.
Another man was grunting on top of Jackie as his hips pistoned into her rhythmically. I could hear her little pants and moans from beneath him, her little mewled cries of "Yea, nn-yes, right there, oh fuck..." but I couldn't tear my eyes away from his chiseled ass, watching the muscles clench and unclench as his heavy balls slapped against her wet cunt.
I realized, in hindsight, that I was numb with shock. I was rooted to the spot when my first reaction should've been to go over there. I should've angrily pulled him off of her, told him to fuck right off and punched him out.
But I didn't. I was frozen and I couldn't look away.
My eyes slowly traveled up past his thighs, up his toned back, taking in his wide, muscled shoulders. I felt a pang in my chest as I realized that I was mentally comparing myself to him. Where did I stand in her eyes? Was he better than me? Was it because he was more built than me?
Numbness started to slowly be edged out by nausea. The longer I stood there, with each passing second, the more I realized that I felt a little sick -- sick with envy. How long had she been cheating on me? Was this the first time, or...?
I didn't want to think about it.
We'd been dating for over six months then and while my friends joked that she was out of my league, I'd always been confident that I could make her happy.
Or at least, I'd thought I could.
Now I couldn't help but wonder and uncertainty crept into the mix of roiling emotions in my chest.
It all froze like icicles in my gut when my eyes made my way up to her. At first, I could barely see her face, hidden under the bulk of him. Then, with startling clarity, I realized that I was looking straight into her dark eyes -- they were glittering with laughter.
How long had she known that I'd been standing there, watching her get fucked by another man? Was it just my imagination or did her moans seem more emphasized now? Almost as if she liked knowing that I was watching while she writhed under another man.
Her slender legs wrapped around his waist, toes pointed like a ballerina's. Her hands slid down to her sides, traveling under his thighs to spread her labia further apart, showing off her slick pussy to me as his girth violated it in front of my eyes. I watched, eyes wide, as his thick cock stretched her tight hole each time he buried himself in her.
Too late, I saw her toes curl as her thighs squeezed tight against his hips. Too late, I saw her fingers dig into his back as she breathily whimpered under him. Too late, I heard their intermingled cries of ecstasy as he came deep in her core.
There was a brief moment of silence as their panted breaths intermingled, foreheads pressed against each other, before it was broken by a shared chuckle. Far too intimately, she kissed him on the lips -- soft and sweet -- it lingered for just a second too long before he pulled away and rolled off of her. His thick cock was still hard as he slid out of her, leaving her well-used pussy a sloppy mess as his cum slowly dribbled out. As he settled on the other side of the bed and laid back to relax, she shifted upwards so that she was held upright by the mound of pillows behind her.
I refused to look at him. Refused to let my eyes drift over and acknowledge him. But I couldn't tear my eyes away from her.
"Did you like that?" Her question was obviously aimed at me, our eyes connected as I stared stoically at her. I wondered what my expression looked like. Was I keeping a poker face? Or could she see right through me? Was she aware of the crazy mix of emotions I was experiencing?
"I know you like watching...so I thought I'd give you a treat this time." She laughed and it felt like a slap to my face. It was strange that she still looked so beautiful to me, smiling coyly at me despite what I'd just witnessed. A cold and selfish beauty. "I missed Alex's cock in me," she purred before sighing wistfully.
Alex. The name was another slap to the face. Her ex.
He leaned in to kiss her on the shoulder before grinning over at me. "Hey man." I couldn't stand seeing his smug face.
At the same time, I found myself remembering all the times she'd made passing comments about him. Comments that I had always shrugged off with a laugh, because they hadn't meant anything...or so I'd thought...
The way he fucked her like a ragdoll. How his cock was so thick she was surprised her pussy was still so tight. How he came so heavily and in such copious amounts that she could feel him filling her with cum like water in a balloon.
"It's been so long since my pussy's felt full," she gave a satisfied sigh. "I needed a proper fuck."
I could tell that she was being purposely dramatic, that she was enjoying every second of belittling me. She was practically purring, like the cat that got the cream, except it was spilling out between her legs rather than dripping from her lips.
"It's too bad you weren't here to see how wet he made me, but look at how much he's stretched my little hole~" I couldn't look away as she spread her legs wide for me, as her fingers spread her cum smeared lips apart to give me a perfect view of her used pussy as his load dripped out of her.
It was like my words had frozen in my chest along with my emotions. Or maybe it's better to say that I was so numb, I couldn't even think. I stood silently before the two, struck mute and dumb. I couldn't muster the anger to rush at them, couldn't even manage to turn and walk away.
"Mm~ I love how sloppy I feel after he's done with me. Just look at how many fingers I can fit in myself now." Her slender fingers slid into herself to demonstrate. First two, which was typically a tight squeeze for her, then three. "I bet your little cock could fit too, even with my fingers inside~"
I hadn't realized how dry my throat had gotten. I tried to swallow, only to cough uncomfortably. Her giggling began like a musical peal only to cut off abruptly before her voice pitched low and seductive. "How long are you going to stand there gaping like an idiot? Get over here and lick me clean already. You know you want to..."
Looking back, maybe this was the moment that everything changed. Or maybe I was already doomed.
Why I did what I did? I can't say.
Logically, I should've walked away.
Instead, my feet moved robotically forwards. Hesitantly at first, even defiantly almost. But her encouraging smile drew me forwards like a puppeteer pulling an invisible string and I realized, almost shamefully, that I could feel my rigid cock straining against the zipper of my pants.
I found myself standing next to her. She looked up at me quizzically, looking slightly annoyed. With one swift motion, her hand was gripping my crotch through my pants. My breath hitched as I felt her grip me firmly, cupping my balls and giving them a squeeze before roughly stroking my erect cock. Her smile only broadened as she confirmed how hard I was.
"Pathetic," she sneered, the smile never leaving her lips. "See Alex? I told you he'd be hard. I knew I was right. You really are a cuck~" She giggled after she said the word. Cuck.
It rang strangely in my ears. Foreign sounding on her tongue.
But maybe I knew, deep down, that it was simply the first time I was hearing the truth. My raw essence, exposed.
With that word ringing in my ears, I let out a surprised, strangled gasp as her fingers dug into my balls through my pants.
"Well, cucky? What are you waiting for? A formal invitation? Get your face where it fucking belongs already!" Her command was barked out followed by a sharp slap to my balls and I found myself obeying even as I winced in pain. My body was on auto-pilot as I found myself kneeling between her, her calves resting behind my shoulders.
