.Another bust
, I thought. Decent scenery at the club, but no real joy. That's OK. Work tomorrow anyway - damn split shifts.
All of that left my mind, however, for a brief minute, when a new girl came sauntering by. In this lighting all I could see were curves and black leather, but she cut a mighty fine figure.
"-ith my buddy Tom," Al was saying. He was the one that always dragged me here, claiming I'd finally meet the girl of my dreams. The real reason was that I was his ride home after he blew the 401k part of his paycheck getting himself and everyone else around him drunk. Good guy, though; best hydraulic tech I knew.
That was half the reason I actually came along with him; if he got himself hurt in a bar brawl, I'd have to work with Mike, and that guy was going to give me an aneurism with his practical jokes. Don't fuck around with heavy equipment, and you'll live to appreciate having all your fingers, I always thought - but management always found an excuse to look the other way because nobody had gotten seriously hurt yet, and I didn't want to be the one to prove my point by being permanently disfigured. The other half of the reason I came, of course, was I couldn't prove Al was actually lying, and sap that I was, hoped he was right.
So there she was, and suddenly my night was looking up. She even came over my way, giving me a precious moment of beautiful confusion on Al's face after she took the drink he offered and walked straight over.
"Hey stranger!" she shouted over the pounding music.
"Hey your-sexy-self!" I said, smiling.
"You dance?" she said.
"Not if you value your toes," I said.
Truly, I had no rhythm. Hopeless klutz on the dance floor, and as I am emphatically not into being shamed or embarrassed, there was no way I was being dragged out there.
"What about this dance? You know this one?"
She reached out and took my hand, putting my fingers to her throat.
Oh, hot. I'd heard about girls that liked it rough, and this one definitely made a good case for giving it a try. Just one thing I'd learned to be essential, however, was negotiation.
"I might. What's your safe word?"
"You want to know what I do if you go too far?"
"That's right."
And then, without warning, the world spun in a whole new direction, centered around an exploding knot of pain in my groin. I clutched the table in one hand, trying to keep myself from going completely to the floor, and managed to swivel myself to land face-first on it, with my other hand, naturally, trying to keep the nerve bundle formerly known as my scrotum from seceding from the nation Tom Felter. Bile rose in my throat, and the lights were suddenly too bright in time with my pounding headache. Al somehow managed to get me up and put my arm over his shoulder. I fought the urge to lash out and return the pain to its source, no matter how attractive she was. I remembered the morality clause in my employment contract allowing my termination in the case of certain criminal convictions, and more importantly my own code of ethics: never hit a woman in anger. I wouldn't be able to look in a mirror ever again. The urge subsided.
"Jesus, man, you struck out in record time there. What the hell were you thinking? At least get her name before you go getting all into her personal space."
"Stay away from her, she's a fucking psycho. I didn't so much as touch her."
"So, what, she stepped into your hand voluntarily?"
"Pretty much," I gasped hoarsely.
"Look, let me get you to the car at least. You can lie down in the back seat until you're good to drive. Or do you need to hit the restroom first?"
"It's time anyway. Work tomorrow, you know."
"Alright, let me pay the tab and we'll bail."
He leaned me up against the wall near the exit and went to the bar.
"You OK there buddy? Need me to get you a cab?" the bouncer said.
"Actually, listen, I need to report a party foul. Did you see that just now?"
"Looked to me like you need to learn to keep your hands to yourself."
"Got it all wrong. She came up to me and hit me for no reason."
"Sure, I've heard that one before."
"For real, I want you to kick her out and blacklist her."
"Look man, my job is to keep the peace in here. She's not screwed with anybody else and she's been here for three hours, and that means I can't go letting your type go giving this place a reputation where guys can get all grabby. The girls won't come near this place, and then the guys won't come near this place, and then I'll be out of a job."
"You wanna talk about a reputation? Try this. I'll tell everybody I work with that this place lets anybody get assaulted for no reason."
I pulled out my Omnicron Industries badge and showed it to him. As the biggest company in town, our workers spent a lot of money at the bar blowing off steam.
"Kick me out if you want, but if she stays, I make sure nobody comes out anymore. Girls or otherwise."
The bouncer frowned. This was a tough position for him.
"Let me call the manager," he said.
"Come on man, let it go," Al said.
I pushed him away.
"What, I'm not allowed to be offended when I get hit
in the balls
because a few guys fuck it up for everybody else with their bad behavior?"
"Hey, I wanna talk to you," a new voice said.
"God, not you again. Keep her away from me!" I said.
"Miss, this man is saying you struck him for no reason. It didn't look that way to me, but I have to ask if that's true because a complaint has been lodged."
"No, it's true," she said.
"You... are you sure? Looked to me like you had the right of it."
"Listen, I'm really sorry. Can I just talk to you for a little bit?"
"Miss, if it's true, I'm going to have to ask you to leave."
"I know. Just let me give him this for his trouble."
She held up a dollar bill.
"Go to he-" I started. A few bucks wasn't going to change my opinion. Only, as I blinked and took another look, that was a
hundred dollar