Groomed During A Massage

It was really after it happened that I realized I may have been groomed. I think about it often.

It all started when I asked a girlfriend of mine where she goes to get massages. I was tired of the gentle massages that many masseuses deliver. She told me where to go and who to go to. She said he was a whiz with his hands and used a lot of pressure, which is what I typically like.

The first time I went to Luke, I was so tense. He had me undress and start face down on the table. I was excited because my friend had told me how great Luke was and I wanted to experience it myself. He started on my back and shoulders where I often hold so much tension. He worked his way down to my legs, oiling up in between. I was in a trance with his hands. No one spoke. I just received. I wanted to scream out several times, the pressure was so deep and it hurt. It was painful. But I didn't say anything. "Take it," I told myself. "You need this, it will feel so good afterwards." I remember my pussy becoming wet during these sessions. They were turning me on. I wondered if it was normal. But then again, I really didn't care if it was normal. It was something I wanted and I enjoyed every second of it. I went to Luke every month for about a year. The massages became more intense as time went on. Looking back, I can see a pattern and things changed from the first massage to the last. I remember going home with bruises on my back and my arms. They weren't where anyone could see them when I wore clothes. But I knew they were there. I thought maybe he was working my muscles too hard, but I kept talking myself out of telling him anything because I was realizing I liked it. I liked what he was doing to me. I liked how rough he was with me. I liked the control he had over me for that hour..that one single hour. I would go home and masturbate after these massages. I would cum over and over again while thinking of his hands inflicting the pressure and pain that they did. I enjoyed feeling his slick hands all over me..bruising me..hurting me. He had to have known, right? He had to have known he was hurting me. I'm sure he could feel me tense up when he put the right amount of pressure. He wanted to break me. I'm certain of this now. He must have liked it, too. I wonder sometimes if he ever jacked off after a massage. Was he as into what he was doing to me as I was into what he was doing to me? I distinctly remember the massages changing over time. But I didn't care. I was his for that hour. He started spending more time on my front, my breasts in particular. He wouldn't quite go to the nipple, but just above. I remember asking myself if this was ok. But I was so engrossed in it..in his rhythm..in his hands. And the way he touched the inside of my thighs. His hands were strong and in charge. He did what he wanted with my body. I felt like every massage he would get closer and closer to sticking his fingers in my wet pussy. He would have felt how much I wanted it and how much I wanted him. I wanted him to continue to hurt me. I also wanted his cock in my pussy. But he always stayed to the parameter of my juicy pussy with those hands. He ran them up and down my inner thighs. He kneaded my ass. He massaged my chest, being sure not to graze my nipples. Each massage, the message became clearer as to what he wanted from me. I would remember for days because of the bruises he left. The soreness in the inner depths of my muscles. Did he want me as much as I wanted him?

So this was inappropriate. Was it inappropriate if I wanted it? He was a professional masseuse. Is it acceptable to slowly but surely cross boundaries with a client? I felt hypnotized by this man. I would wonder where the entire hour went while his hands were on me, enjoying me. I half expected for him to whip out his penis and put it in my depths during these massages. What would have happened if he did?