"At baggage claim. Home in about an hour."
The empty carousel spun as I jockeyed for position; the sooner I could get my bag and be home, the better. I was tired and frustrated. The trip itself was too long at two weeks, and I slept poorly during it. I always did when I was away from home, but especially this time. My phone dinged.
"See you soon."
Well, that was faster than Linh had responded in a while. When I was out of town this time, it was a coinflip if she'd respond at all. If she did, it was sometimes hours later. We'd fought before I left. We almost never fought. I'm a big believer in discussion and consensus; even when we strongly disagree, we almost never raise our voices. This time, though, we did.
I finally saw my bag and leaned out to grab it. I'm tall, with a good reach, so I had an advantage over the other folks there. I had made the mistake of buying a very common plain black case, so I checked the tag and found the expected "Alex Lancaster" before I started to make my way out of the terminal. I stopped briefly to help a small elderly woman that was struggling to get her comically large bag off the carousel, then headed to the parking garage to get my car.
For the entire drive, I thought about what was likely awaiting me at home. The argument. It was the same one we'd had a number of times recently. Kids. It always came down to when we should have kids.
Linh and I had been together for a little over seven years and married for nearly six of them. We had gotten together through a mutual friend. Linh had been in a bad relationship a few months before we met, and I hadn't been with anyone seriously since my junior year in college. I was quiet, analytical, and reserved. Good qualities in a researcher, not so much when trying to meet women. But our friend decided I was just what Linh needed, and it turned out she was right.
Linh is very attractive, albeit striking more than conventionally beautiful. She's petite and athletic, with an almost boyish body, expressive eyes, and long jet black hair. She captivated me from the moment we met. She has a wicked sense of humor, a kind manner, and a complete lack of tolerance for dishonesty. We shared a number of interests: fantasy and science fiction, electronic music, fitness, and a guilty pleasure programmed into me by my older sisters: trashy romcoms. We spent hours together on our first date, until the restaurant staff were putting the tables on the chairs. She kissed me at the door of her apartment, a sweet kiss with a promise of more, a promise that would be fulfilled very soon. I felt like I'd found the person I was meant to be with. We were inseparable almost immediately.
I found that we had a number of differing interests as well, which is good; it's important for people in a relationship to have things that are just their own. But on our third night spent together in Linh's bed, she confided in me that she had certain predilections that I didn't share. I've tried to indulge her since then, but it's been difficult for me.
I took the off ramp that led to our house and mentally prepared for my homecoming. I hoped that it would be loving: a kiss, small talk about the trip, perhaps a night spent making up for lost time. That would be nice. But given how we had left things, along with the fact that Linh had seemed distant while I traveled, I expected we'd get right back into the fray when I opened the door. I hoped not, but I had to be prepared.
The whole situation was frustrating. Not long after we moved in together, we had discussed when we'd like to have kids, and we had agreed to a plan: when we had a house, were established in our careers, and at least five years had passed in our marriage, we would start trying. But we had hit all of those milestones months ago, and Linh was still resistant. Her arguments weren't based on any kind of tangible reason, but on a fear of being tied down. Ironic, really. When she said this, it made me question whether my wife was as committed to our relationship as I was. I said so, and our discussion turned into an argument, then a fight. That was almost a month ago, and I didn't see a way around it.
Only a few lights were on downstairs. After getting my suit bag and suitcase out of the car, I slung my laptop bag over my shoulder and headed for the front porch. I had hoped that, perhaps, Linh would be waiting for me. But when I unlocked the door and headed inside, she wasn't there. I called her name and heard nothing. Great. She had probably used the hour head start to get out of the house before I got here.
I shook my head and started to stack my bags in the foyer. I'd deal with them later, but I was tired, unhappy, and lonely. As I went to toss my wallet and keys in their usual place, a tray on the entryway table, I saw something unexpected: a note. It was open, not folded, and in large, swooping cursive, merely said, "Upstairs." The was a lipstick print on it in Linh's favorite "Fuck Me" shade of red. Well. Perhaps this homecoming would be a friendly one after all.
I grabbed a bottle of water from the kitchen. I was dehydrated after the trip, for one, and figured that if things went well, I'd need to be as hydrated as possible. But for the other... it was kind of petty, but I felt like making her wait. Not the best way to approach our problems, certainly not what the marriage guides would say to do, but Linh had treated me like an afterthought the whole time I was gone. She could wait for me now. It's not like I was going to leave her for hours or not respond at all, as she had done with me.
I frowned at myself. I was better than this. I wanted us to be better than this. I should take the olive branch that was being offered. Perhaps we could reconnect tonight, and that would let us approach the problem with a new attitude. I started to climb the stairs, but the house was still eerily quiet.
I called her name again. No answer. I saw a sliver of dim, flickering light under our bedroom door. Approaching it, I listened for any sounds but still heard none. I pushed it open.
